You Can’t Cover MY Contraception, Obamahitler!

Covering something is not the same as putting it in the water supply, okay?

A Missouri legislator asked the federal court on Wednesday to exempt his family from contraception coverage through the state insurance plan, saying it violates his religious beliefs as a Catholic.

Rep. Paul Wieland, R-Imperial, and his wife, Teresa, filed suit in U.S. District Court downtown against the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services and two other federal agencies. It asks the court to declare that the mandate for contraception coverage in the federal health-insurance law, known as Obamacare, violates their First Amendment freedom of religion.

They qualify for the state health plan through his legislative service. Wieland, 50, is serving a third term in the House and has announced his candidacy for the Missouri Senate seat held by Sen. Ryan McKenna, D-Crystal City, who cannot run in 2014 because of term limits.

Wieland said they were seeking a personal exemption from the contraception requirement, not a blanket ruling against the law. But he said a victory would give the same right to other, like-minded people.

There is no actual way this is a thing. “You can cover everybody else, but not me, because if you hold out the possibility of paying for it, it will force my wife to get gay abortions, or something, and Jesus will cry.” I do not UNDERSTAND. I don’t need coverage for prostate cancer yet my health plan provides it, and you don’t see me going in there yelling about how I don’t have a prostate so I don’t need the coverage and exempt me from it and … what, give me my six cents for that particular part of it back?

I hope I will never have to use the coverage I get for half the shit that could go wrong with my body. What is the problem with just not using it, and going on about your day? Does the mere thought of birth control make you want to sex your secretary, mailman, kid’s second grade teacher? Is this like if you show kids condoms they’ll suddenly think about penis + vagina because otherwise that will never happen? Where is the imposition?

I cannot believe somebody paid a paralegal to type this shit up.

A.

10 thoughts on “You Can’t Cover MY Contraception, Obamahitler!

  1. MichaelF says:

    Does Representative Wieland intend to endorse snake handling, marijuana and/or peyote use, animal sacrifice, or other examples of religious beliefs or expressions presently prohibited by law? I for one would like to know.
    Or…maybe Mr. Wieland can forego insurance, and pay the tax penalty if his conscience is so disturbed…

  2. pansypoo says:

    since the publikans en masse are blocking abortion, of course they think WE will force them to not make babies. because we are horrible.

  3. mellowjohn says:

    well, he could always totally decline is government-provided health care insurance and take his chances on the open market.

  4. Snarki, child of Loki says:

    “Okay Wieland, we’ll let you out of the contraception coverage, but you’ll have to double up on the Death Panels”

  5. MapleStreet says:

    Even though I am sympathetic to those forced to do things against their religious convictions, I DON’T GET IT.
    If he doesn’t want to be covered for birth control, he can simply not get a prescription for the pills.

  6. MapleStreet says:

    Oh, I wonder if he has considered that even under the most rigid and dogmatic Catholic Moral Theology, there are times when birth control medications are morally justified.
    I quickly think of the two-fold effect test in morality as well as the hormones being used in the treatment of various bodily disorders.

  7. Tommy says:

    someone needs to tell that stupid holy roller than there are more uses for birth control pills than contraception.

  8. triplepoint says:

    ‘Well, Mr Wieland,’ the insurance company might say, ‘We can’t actually stop your wife or daughter from getting contraception, but we can offer you a free gonadectomy if they do. Would that satisfy you?’

  9. JCtx says:

    I think the real problem is that Mr. Wieland is afraid that the money he spent for his insurance will be used to pay for someone else’s contraception. What he doesn’t seem to get is that anyone that pays for insurance pays for their own coverage up to the limit of the amount they paid for it. In other words, I pay $2400 / year for health insurance; if I need contraception, it comes out of that $2400. Only if I have some sort of health problem that takes me over that $2400 will anybody else’s money be used to cover my problems (and at that time, it really isn’t someone else’s money; it’s the insurance company’s money).

  10. Bitter Scribe says:

    That may be the ridiculous lawsuit ever (although this is a close second).

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