This Is Personal

Lucianne’s idea of idle gossip.

Dozens of conservatives, including Lucianne Goldberg, have been speculating that the Democratic presidential nominee has Marfan syndrome, which is characterized by unusually long arms and legs, tall height and an elongated countenance.

Some have wondered whether Abraham Lincoln had the genetic disorder.

It would be a major concern in the case of Kerry, as some patients suffer heart problems because of it, if it were true. And right-wing bloggers have been speculating that doctors have “prescribed” the Democratic candidate’s active regimen of hockey, windsurfing and other sports to keep him limber. But a Marfan syndrome expert seriously doubts that’s the case.

Dr. Mary Roman of New York Presbyterian Hospital, told us: “I think it’s idle gossip. What Kerry is doing in terms of his physical activity is far in excess of what we recommend for patients. It sounds like he really pushes himself.”

Hey, Lucianne. C’mon over here. Spend some time getting to know people afflicted with the thing you like to joke so much about, one of whom is my baby sister. She’s beautiful and funny and very, very brave, and for the past 10 years or so she’s struggled with this disease. Every day she gets up and goes to school and goes to work and lives with this time bomb, and she does it all with unending cheer, courage and grace. Her shoes are too good for your lying mouth to kiss.

Let’s give the NMF some turkee in honor of this unparalleled and vicious crap.