After watching this, I just have to say, to all the moral-values voting, Bush-supporting people out there who equate decent and patriotic behavior with hating gay people:

FUCK YOU.

Ray’s bags may be packed for Iraq, but there’s work to be done here at home before this soldier boy reports for duty.

Interior Design

Ray’s apartment is practically a blank slate, and the few items he has are hardly childproof. With Carson along, he and Thom select a table with kid-friendly rounded corners and a bright red couch.

Back at the apartment, the transformation is astounding. White walls and “bleh” furniture have been replaced with bold reds, soft greens and great new pieces that perfectly fit the space. A curtain over a bare wall creates the illusion of a window in the living room, while a new crib for Sabrina is a big improvement over sleeping in the playpen.

Fashion

Most of Ray’s fashion needs for the next year and a half will be taken care of by Uncle Sam, but before he ships out he needs to get decked out in something formal. Carson helps him select a sophisticated blue shirt matched with a chocolaty brown shoe.

Food

Ted gives Ray a tour of the posh hotel suite the Fab Five has reserved for their second honeymoon, complete with a sky-high view of Central Park. Since no special occasion is complete without a little bubbly, Ted shares a few pointers on how to store and open champagne.

Grooming

A trip to the spa with Kyan almost always means a mani-pedi, and usually entails a lot more. (Adam, we still feel your pain.) Not this time. Instead, he surprises Ray with a rose-petal bath…with Maria.

Culture

Any occasion is made more special by a gift from the heart. Or, in this case, a gift of the heart — a keepsake charm of a split heart, half for her and half for him.

No wedding would be complete without a wedding shower, and the Fab Five have come bearing gifts. Thom presents a $5000 gift card to provide for Maria and Sabrina. Jai adds a digital video camera and a pair of laptops to keep the family connected even when thousands of miles apart, plus a box full of DVDs to keep them entertained while alone. Carson offers an olfactory exchange — his and hers cashmere sweaters; wear once and swap, so the familiar scent-of-spouse is always at hand. To help Ray deal with his insomnia, Kyan gives him a good night’s sleep kit complete with mask, book and CD. Ted, ever the traditionalist, has picked out small appliances, including a fancy red toaster and a shiny mixer, to which he adds a year’s supply of free groceries. Finally, all five offer Ray a crate of necessities for his stay overseas, including cross-training shoes, military-approved eyewear, a two-week supply of underwear and lots of sunscreen.

The Event

The wedding takes place in a rooftop studio, resplendent in flowing purple drapes and fall foliage. Before the ceremony, Ray takes a moment to write his own vows, then greets his mother and sister.

Here comes the bride, a vision of loveliness. To him, she says, “thanks for teaching me the meaning of family…and most important, the meaning of love.” To her, he says, “no matter where I’m sent or how far, our love will be together.” Smiles in public give way to tears in a private moment as Ray presents Maria with their split heart necklace.

The Results

When we ask our finest sons and daughters to put their lives on the line for their country, the least we can do is make sure the needs of those they’ve left behind will not weigh heavily on their minds. Although no one knows what lies ahead for Ray, Maria and Sabrina, the Fab Five was honored to be able to make his send off a memorable one.

Show your thanks to our servicemen and women with your own care package or donation. See our Culture Hints & Tips to find out how.

Can someone who thinks gay rights are a plague upon society lecture me on how high their moral ground is again, how much they love what America is all about and how Hollywood and its gays and liberals are against all that? Because, after watching a group of guys the military wouldn’t have in its ranks for their moral turpitude laud the military and the people putting their lives on the line for their country, and giving gifts to the family of a serviceman, I’ve sort of forgotten just what it is here that I’m supposed to hate so much.

Motherfuckers.

A.