Dwells My Life and Death

Dear wingnuts: Please leave this family alone.

That’s what they are, a family. Going through one of the most agonizing decisions of their lives. Looking at a person they loved and cherished, who they knew as a daughter and wife, and deciding what should happen to her. They disagree. There’s a reason we have family court. What there is no reason for is your presence on the street, your speeches in the Senate, your signs and your banners and your fucking balloons.

The protesters. The self-appointed spokespeople for one “side” or another. God Almighty. Truly, God Almighty.

Get a life. I’m not kidding. Find something to do with your time other than to insert yourself as a protester on either side of this case. Because it’s not about a woman who needs defending, it’s about you needing to be part of some larger drama, it’s about you wanting to be where the TV cameras are. It’s about you, you, you, you. It’s about the self-satisfied expression on your fat fucking face as you sit in your lawn chair, you fat white well-off slob taking a vacation from your job so you can be part of the spectacle.

It’s about your need to take a stand on something. It’s about your need to hear your own voice talking about how moral you are. It’s about you wanting to feel good about yourself, because you stood up for something. And it’s not that I don’t sympathize with that urge, but can’t you see, it’s unseemly when it’s about some person’s death. You don’t get your own way just because you feel something ought to happen. You don’t get to insert yourself into someone else’s life and demand that they live it or end it according to your rules.

And this goes for people who want this woman to be allowed to die as much as it is for the people who want to keep her alive.

This is a family tragedy. This is a dispute between parents and spouses over the life and death of someone they loved. Let them settle it between themselves. Let them work it out or not work it out. Let them do what they choose. They love her, they know her, they are bound by blood or marriage. There is a reason kin decide these things.

Opinions are like assholes, and a lot of you are acting like it today. You don’t get to have an opinion about everything. You don’t get to decide everything. You don’t get to go to Congress and demand they enact laws because you read about something or saw it on TV. You have no say in this. You shouldn’t.

I have utterly no idea if Terri Schiavo should have her feeding tube removed. And it would be beyond presumptuous to assume I should form an opinion. Who am I? Her friend? Her spouse? Her mother? Who am I to get to even say what I think should happen? What possible basis do I have for such determinations? How dare I even consider the question in light of my own desires?

There are people outside Terri Schiavo’s hospital with placards who are praying.

I hope it’s for humility.

A.