Multi-Cultural Baboon-a-palooza

From Holden:

President HorseWanker took his Social Security demolition derby before the Latino Coalition Conference in Washington today. You’d think that the White House could find someone with a working knowledge of Spanish, or at least the ability to find a Spanish-English dictionary online, to transcribe such an event. I guess that’s too much to expect.

THE PRESIDENT: Thank you all. Thanks for coming. Please be seated. Si ntese.

Chimpy wasted no time bashing Treasury Bonds today…

The safety net will work for them, but there is a hole in the safety net for a younger generation of Americans coming up. And here’s why — first, let me just describe the nature of the system, and that is it’s a pay-as-you-go system. You pay in payroll taxes and the government takes care of retirees, and with money left over, spends it on other programs. And all that is left is a file cabinet with IOUs. See, some in our country believe that the system works this way: you pay in the system, we hold your money for you, and when you retire, we give it back to you. That’s not the way it works. It’s a pay-as-you-go system.

…before he praised them.

The government doesn’t make those decisions for you. The government makes options available for you. And then when it comes time to retire, you can go into a Treasury bond account — a perfectly safe investment, all of which, by the way, all those investment vehicles yield a better rate of return than you’re getting on the government’s money.

Later, while speaking with a scripted participant, Chimpy forgot where he “earned” his MBA.

MR. VARGAS: And I’m a little embarrassed to say, but I think I’ll share with the President that the first time he ran, I didn’t vote for the President. So excuse me for that, sir. But I’m sure — (laughter.)

THE PRESIDENT: I understand a lot of other people didn’t, either. (Laughter and applause.)

THE PRESIDENT: Great job, thanks for coming. (Applause.) The fact that you went to Harvard bothers me more than the fact that you didn’t vote for me. (Laughter.)

MR. VARGAS: We both went to HBS [Harvard Business School].

THE PRESIDENT: That’s right. I forgot that part.

And with two other “guests” he forgot the script completely.

THE PRESIDENT: I mean, think about how great it’s going to be when Jos and Jessica, as they have an investment account — they’re young, new married — we’re about to talk to them here — but on a monthly basis, a quarterly basis, daily basis in some cases, you watch your assets grow.

THE PRESIDENT: It’s great to see you. (Applause.) Jos . Jos and Jessica, welcome. Thank you all. Newlyweds?

MS. GOMEZ: No, five years.

THE PRESIDENT: See, not newlyweds.