Another Day, Another Moron Online

Dude. Dude dude dude dude DUDE:

Typing rambling screeds in an anonymous blog he called “Fast Times at Regnef High,” a Fenger High School teacher unleashed his frustration over the chaos he saw around him.

He labeled his students “criminals,” saying they stole from teachers, dealt drugs in the hallways, had sex in the stairwells, flaunted their pregnant bellies and tossed books out windows. He dismissed their parents as unemployed “project” dwellers who subsist on food stamps, refuse to support their “baby mommas” and bad-mouth teachers because their no-show teens are flunking.

He took swipes at his colleagues, too–“union-minimum” teachers, literacy specialists who “decorate their office door with pro-black propaganda,” and security officers whose “loyalty is to the hood, not the school.”

In his blog, the teacher did not identify himself or his students, the exact name of his school or the city where he taught. But like most bloggers, he wanted an audience, so he wrote in his blog that he had leaked news of his site to a few co-workers. Soon enough, the 30-year-old teacher’s name was the talk of the school.

Stupid McJerkperson, man, you were so close! So close to doing everything right if you want to talk trash about your employers on the Internet. You did it anonymously. You didn’t name the people you were bitching about. You did it in relative obscurity. It literally hurts me, man, how close you came to following all the rules for being a total and complete online asshole and totally and completely getting away with it!

But your desire for attention got the better of you, didn’t it? You just couldn’t stand it that your insightful analyses of the Chicago Public School System were going unread, unappreciated. Your constructive criticism was going unheeded! So unfair! So you decided to share. Oh, Dipshit O’Attentionwhore, your hubris was your downfall. It’s positively Shakespearean.

It astonishes me that there are still people who do not know this is not okay, who do things like send profane hate mail from their work e-mail accounts and list their work phone numbers, much less actually say derogatory things about the company or organization they’re involved in on a non-password-protected site. They ALWAYS find out, especially if you’re enough of a dumbass to TELL THEM ABOUT IT.