As Wily As A Wolverine

Though she is a fan of the hateful Yankees, Sars reminds us that baseball season is above all announcer-mocking season:

But at least baseball is back, and one of my favorite things about a new baseball season is renewing my love-hate relationship with Bill Simmons’s columns on I yaw back and forth all year between wanting to buy the guy a beer and wanting to stuff the guy into a beehive, and his Opening Day column did not disappoint in the schizo department.

For your reading pleasure, please direct your Intarwebs to Shut UP, Tim McCarver:

McCarver on Yankees pitcher Mariano Rivera: “He’s so impressive with that excellent gait of his, the way he walks. There’s nobody that walks any easier, or comes in from the bullpen with an easier gait than Rivera. And I think that’s part of the reason for his success because the ball just explodes out of his hand – hitters just can’t believe he can do that.”