14 thoughts on “Breaking News coming

  1. Because it’s all about fat Denny, ain’t it?
    Jeebus, who knew the guy was somebody, I always thought he was the worlds largest animotronic sock puppet. Apparently the terrorists win if Denny goes down, er, eww, ick, well, he needs to be put down anyway.
    In a corner far away from humans.
    Duckman GR

  2. A couple of the IMs (ewwww, shudders) implied that he had met with at least one, but I don’t think they have any evidence or corroboration to prove it.

  3. I guess this means the Pope will have to make Foley a cardinal in Rome.
    —Aaaargh

  4. ” Mark Foley is either a lying sonofabitch or he never should have been elected. ”
    Why are these mutually exclusive? I say both are true!

  5. I’m sorry, that excuse is unfuckingacceptable on its face. Mark Foley is either a lying sonofabitch or he never should have been elected. I’m guessing it’s the former.
    A mean kid beat me up when I was young but I don’t threaten minors with violence. God, I’m so pissed off about this. I hope this ruins, absolutely fucking RUINS, the Republican Party forever.
    They’re moral cowards, every one of them. Corrupt, immoral, sleazy, depraved cowards.

  6. OF course they can. If it involves Democrats! It’s really not news until they can turn it into something that ALL politicians do.
    Or:
    He and one of the pages are going to get married.
    Bill Frist has looked at a video tape of Foley and one of the Foley/ pages IM sessions and has declared “He certainly seems to respond to visual stimuli.”
    Condi Rice has stated, ” “No one could have imagined them IMing each other.”
    Foley said he was sorry for what Dennis Hastert and his family have “had to go through” after the Hastert lied to protect him him in this sex scandal.
    Hastert forgave Foley saying, “‘Accidents do and will happen’

  7. You should hear hannity spinning this.
    “The media KNEW!” Back in Nov. 2005 and they didn’t do anything about it!
    If they didn’t do anything about it then they need to cut Hastert slack.
    Also, Democrats are bad too.

  8. Here is my guess at what the news is.
    Congressman Mark Foley has been sent to a “treatment center” in Egypt.
    Treatments include stress positions, waterboarding and wearing adult Women’s underwear on his heads. Because his action are a threat to National Security he has been declared an enemy combatant and will be held indefinately and not be able to see the charges against him.
    Foley’s lawyer strongly protests this treatment saying, “No one could have imagined that the leadership of the country would use extraordinary rendention against us. If Congressman Foley had known what his vote for s.3930 would have been used against American citizens he would have never voted for it. Republican’s who have voted for s. 3930 should ask the president not to sign the bill so that other citizens like Congressman Foley will not have to suffer his fate.”
    How about that? Did I guess right?

  9. Where’s the other shoe? Why hasn’t it dropped? I find the most conspicuous detail missing is him acting on his impulses. It is hard to believe that someone this aggressive in his fantasies did actually cross over and live one out. Did I miss something?
    cry_havoc

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