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Jeebus. Even Mr. Burns Isn’t This Bad


Good Boss.


Bad boss.

Sweet mother Mary’s braided armpit hairs. The turkey-necked motherfucker above is Jimmy Cayne, Chairman of Bear Sterns and Fucksocket Extraordinaire. While his company was tanking, what do you think he was doing? Well, because the Guys At The Top always work so much harder than everyone else, he was off playing cards. Or golf.Seriously.

Bear Stearns Cos. Inc. Chairman
Jimmy Cayne was playing cards in a tournament late last week
while his company’s future appeared to be at risk, according a
published report.

As the bank hammered out an emergency funding deal on
Thursday with the Federal Reserve and JPMorgan Chase,
which resulted in Bear’s shares falling by as much as half,
Cayne was playing in the North American Bridge Championship in
Detroit, The Wall Street Journal reported on its Web site on
Friday.

Cayne, who in January stepped down as Bear Stearns’
long-time chief executive, is no stranger to controversy about
his hobbies. Last year he was criticized for spending too much
time playing bridge and golf while Bear stumbled on wrong-way
bets on subprime mortgages.

Cayne played cards last week during a period in which Bear
Stearns CEO Alan Schwartz held conference calls with directors
about the pending cash pledge, the newspaper said, although
Cayne participated in at least some of the dialogue.

 

Can’t we bring back crucifixion for these cocksuckers? Or at least scourging? This piece of shit is now responsible for a small town being unemployed. Think about that. There will be at least 10,000 firings since JP Morgan bought Bear Sterns for pennies on the dollar. That’s the size of a small town. Ten thousand people who, like the Enron employees, held portfolios that were loaded with shares of the company where they worked. Ten thousand people, most of whom just wanted to show up to work, draw a paycheck, make ends meet, and enjoy their families and lives. 

Jimmy Cayne, a miserable failure of a human being, just stole from an entire village. And that doesn’t begin to address the larger implications for all of us of his company’s failure. If there were a just and loving god in the universe, he’d be looking at 25 with an L in general population prison. 

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