claimed CNBC shirked its journalistic duty by believing corporate lies,
rather than being an investigative “powerful tool of illumination.” And
he alleged CNBC was ultimately in bed with the businesses it covered _
that regular people’s stocks and 401Ks were “capitalizing on your
For his part, Cramer disagreed with Stewart
on a few points, but mostly acknowledged that he could have done a
better job foreseeing the economic collapse: “We all should have seen
Cramer said CNBC was “fair game” to the
criticism and acknowledged the network was perhaps overeager to believe
the information it was fed from corporations.
You monumental dick. You still think this is about you, about who loves who more, about who has the most successful show. You still think that this is all just a big ironic joke, that this isn’t actually real. You still think the money you talk about is what, like Monopoly money, just paper, just numbers, just stuff you can spout and not have to deal with any actual consequences. That’s not Grandma’s retirement or your dad’s pension, it’s just Jim Cramer having a wacky good time! Money’s just like basketball or Britney, it doesn’t really exist except in the magic box called the TV.
Being fair, though, Jim, you cheesedick, why shouldn’t you, really? You’re gonna have a job no matter what the market does because you can always convince somebody you’re ratings gold, especially when you’re basically that drunk dude at the party making a bong out of an eggplant. Why shouldn’t you act like the biggest thing that anybody could ever think to call you on is wanting to be successful? It’s not like anybody lost anything listening to you, right? It’s not like the whole economy went down the shitter and some people can’t afford to buy their medicine anymore while you got all bug-eyed and red-faced and yelly into the camera like a meth-huffing Muppet screaming buy or sell. Right?
You jackass. You wanna go make out with the mirror, fine. But don’t ask the rest of us to watch. It’s gross.
And while we’re at it, why the fuck is it I spend all day listening to print journos beefing about the lack of standards for opinionating on the Internet and garnering an audience while clowns like this choad and Glenn Beck pollute the airwaves with barely justifiable bullshit every day for the last decade? Have we just basically given up on TV “news?” Are we still pretending it doesn’t exist? Is it beneath us to notice that while bloggers lack standards and a stylebook of their own, you can say completely fucking anything on TV and nobody will ever call you on it, ever?
In fact, if you say enough barely justifiable shit and once in a while slip right over into genocidal racist maniac territory, they might promote you. Hire you to do special football analysis. Give you speaking fees. And you don’t need to worry about being repeatedly wrong, not even in the age of YouTube, because it’s like the whole exercise is so stupid we’re just skipped right over it to hate on bloggers for some reason. Maybe we could get on that if we’re not too busy repeating one another’s stories about beer pong herpes and Jesus appearing in people’s bowls of Lucky Charms.
ps. Watching a bunch of people just right now figure out that the Daily Show has always been a satire of the network news is never going to stop being fucking hilarious.