Since I’m tired of the whole gate thing, I’m working on some new buzz words for the the meltdown that is unfolding in the Garden State right now. I’ve long thought David Wildstein would be the John Dean of the scandal, so what you think of calling him John Deanstein? Yeah, I know John Dean was an uber goy but I like sticking a stein on his name; it beats the hell out of gating it. It evokes images of beer, Tricky Dick’s dog Checkers and Pat’s Republican cloth coat. Oh wait, that was Tricky’s first scandal…

Fat Fuckistan is an obvious reference, but it won’t out live the life of this scandal, especially since Big Pussy sleeps with the fishes. End of obligatory Sopranos reference. It does have, however, the added virtue of fulfilling my FQ aka fuck quotient. I got a heavy load with Jude on maternity leave…

Now that I’ve wasted everyone’s time with this deeply silly post, it’s time for some JERSEY ROCK AND ROLL: