No One Ever Tells You is a torchy blues song that was written in 1956 by Carroll Coates and Hub Atwood. It was first recorded by Frank Sinatra for his A Swingin’ Affair album. It’s peak Sinatra and peak Nelson Riddle.

We have three versions of this swell song. We begin with the patron saint of the Friday Cocktail Hour:

Shirley Bassey recorded No One Ever Tells You in 1959:

Next up, B.B. King and Diane Schuur. I told you this was a blues song.

Finally, some lagniappe with another song with the same title. This No One Ever Tells You was written by Carole King, Gerry Goffin, and Phil Spector:

That’s it for this week. I wrote this as Zeta bore down on New Orleans. After the big blow, one thing is certain: I need a cocktail and so do you. It’s what Bogie, Betty, and Frank would want. Never argue with them.