This will so totally work, you guys:
Claire McCaskill will not be attending the Democratic National Convention in Charlotte, a McCaskill aide confirmed to TPM Tuesday. McCaskill joins a list of vulnerable Democratic politicians whose home districts are hostile ground for President Obama and who will be steering clear of the convention.
This always works. It’s always totally effective for a Democrat to run against other Democrats. I mean, we know it completely impresses the Sunday shows, and that’s who’s really voting anyway! It makes you look all mavericky and complecticated, and it absolutely insulates you from criticism that you’re a babykilling gay-married who wept over Osama’s bullet-ridden corpse while listening to a dramatic reading of Rules for Radicals by Bill Ayers and Al Sharpton. In Chicago. Where you took the bus.
It is just so fucking predictable and sad at this point, watching Democrats fall for this shit. I don’t know who’s advising them. I don’t know who’s sitting them down and saying, for too long in American history we have relished electing bold and courageous leaders who display the values of loyalty and integrity even during difficult times. For too long, Americans have chosen men and women with gusto and gallantry, whose acts of bravery have inspired little schoolchildren and lit the fires of hope in every heart across this dark, dark planet we call home.
Now, as a country, we finally are ready to vote for a bunch of pussies who are askeered of standing at the side of the nation’s first black president whose re-election is only vaguely endangered because his opponent’s asshole supporters have more money than God and blowing it on dressage horses got old. Right now, America is looking for a candidate who knows who her friends are, and wants to be as far away from them as possible. Lest someone on Fox call her a rude name.
WHICH THEY ARE SO TOTALLY DOING ANYWAY. So it’s not even effective politics. It’s not even working.
Look, I’m not saying you should never disagree with your friends. I fight with my friends all the time about stuff and I love them like I love my left breast. What I am saying is that in moments of extremity, say, during an election year when your enemies want to kill and then eat you, you might consider that if you throw your friends overboard you’ll be left with your enemies, alone.
A.