From Tena: Good Rest to You Sweet Liberals, Let nothing you dismay – remember down in Austin Earle has cornered Tom Delay, The Hammer’s days are over they’re going to make him pay – O Tidings of Comfort and Joy, Comfort and Joy! O Tidings of Comfort and Joy. And to our nation’s capital an honest man has come he’s gathered lots of evidence and presented has he some, Dear Patrick Fitzgerald has beaten Libby like a drum – O Tidings of Comfort and Joy, Comfort and Joy! O Tidings of Comfort and Joy. Now gather round Sweet Liberals and … Continue reading Good Rest to You, Sweet Liberals

Peter Rabbit wastes the bastards! Happy Holidays, everybody. A. Continue reading Tom Kitten Gave Peter His Anti-Tank Gun Willingly

I’m making a cheesecake and the ferrets are napping in preparation for tearing open their presents later tonight, so here’s a fittingly festive photo of them from a couple of months ago: Stripe continues to gain weight and eat well, and nuzzles all of you for giving him so much love. A. Continue reading Friday Ferretblogging: ReRun Edition

From Tena: the long, jolly slog “I hear they got Rudolph today,” says me. “No!” says Giblets. “Not Rudolph! With his unmatched dogfighting skills and his nose so bright he was invincible!” “It’s true,” says me. “Zombie Judah Maccabee shot im down over the Island of Misfit Toys with his dreidel of doom.” “Damn you Hannukah!” says Giblets. “Will your eight days of madness never end!” “Do you think Santa really has a secret plan to take the Kwanzaan capital an win the war?” says me. “Of course he does!” says Giblets. “And once Christmas spreads to Kwanzaa it will … Continue reading The War to End All Christmas Wars

Google “Hey Crackhead.” Trust me on this. A. Continue reading Entirely Trivial and Completely Non-Political Humor

Via NYMary, who I will get for this later: Seven Things To Do Before I Die 1. See Jerusalem. 2. Finish my next book. 3. Make peace with the people I hate. 4. Finish a bike race. 5. Have a child … maybe. 6. Go skydiving. 7. Get a tattoo. Seven Things I Cannot Do 1. Sing. 2. Sit still. 3. Be late. 4. Let it go, already. 5. Break up with someone. 6. Swim. 7. Drive stick. Seven Things That Attract Me to…Blogging 1. Getting to argue all the time. 2. Meeting smart people. 3. Being read by more … Continue reading All Memes Go To Heaven

Now Harry Walker is the one that manages this crew He doesn’t like it when we drink and fight and smoke and screw But when we win our games each day Then what the fuck can Harry say? It makes a fellow proud to be an Astro. — Ball Four, by Jim Bouton I hate to interfere with a good fanwank such as that going on over this profile of Kos in Washington Monthly, but it was actually something the author said not about Kos but about his readers, his “generation” if you will, that pissed me off: The younger-than-35 … Continue reading Winning

Look. There are Republicans in Congress who are clearly intelligent people. I may disagree with them strongly, I may think their worldview is paranoid and unfortunate, I may think they’ve been supporting a government contrary to their own stated principles for the past five years and there’s nothing I wouldn’t do to see them removed from office and replaced with a Democrat. Nonetheless, they clearly understand our system of government, their own responsibilities, rules and procedures, and how things are done. They recognize that what they do is a job and they’re serious about doing it as they feel is … Continue reading Serious People

I’m enjoying reading the Steve vs. Jen vs. commenters mudfight going on over at the News Blog. And the reactions to this over at the crack den as well. I say enjoy not because I like watching people smack one another around but because this is the stuff we don’t talk about often enough, how much we make and how much we think others make, expectations and class assumptions and how that affects our perceptions of our so-called “service economy.” And it plays into all kinds of political discussions we’ve had: remember Jonah Goldberg cluelessly asking why people didn’t just … Continue reading Gold Digger

Another for the “imagine if Clinton did it” file, this one courtesy of Froomkin: “Working passengers began lining up their laptops to share the power from a couple of working outlets – particularly the reporters who urgently needed to prepare their articles to transmit during a quick refueling stop in England. “But when Cheney said his iPod needed to be recharged, it took precedence above all else and dominated one precious outlet for several hours. The vice president’s press staff intervened so a reporter could use the outlet for 15 minutes to charge a dead laptop, but then the digital … Continue reading Vice President Asshole

Leave the ideological arguments out of it for once and just acknowledge that these people suck at their jobs: The same court that had granted the administration wide latitude in holding Padilla without charges or a court appearance now is suggesting that the detention was a mistake. As a result, the U.S. Court of Appeals for the 4th Circuit said prosecutors could not take custody of Padilla from the military and take him to Miami, where he now faces indictment on terrorism charges. In issuing its denial, the court cited the government’s changing rationale for Padilla’s detention, questioning why it … Continue reading Court To US: Get It Together, Wouldja Please?

I have a question. Why didn’t everyone like this movie? It’s all about the stuff we’re supposed to want and how fucked up it is, and it’s funny and weird in a sweetly hilarious way and I’m gonna go watch it again. A. Continue reading ‘I will be your ninja assassin!’

and sometimes you win: WASHINGTON – The Senate blocked an attempt to open an Alaska wildlife refuge to oil drilling Wednesday, foiling an attempt by drilling backers to force the measure through Congress as part of a must-have defense spending bill. It was a stinging defeat for Sen. Ted Stevens, R-Alaska, one of the Senate’s most powerful members, who had given senators a choice to support the Alaska drilling measure, or risk the political fallout of voting against money for American troops and for victims of Hurricane Katrina. Suck it, Stevens, you worthless sack of shit. A. Continue reading Sometimes You Lose, Sometimes It Rains

NTodd speak. You listen. A. Continue reading As The Kids Say These Days …

Censure and investigate possible impeachment. Damn right. Damn right. Listen. We’ve been moving towards this for years. The president and Jackboot Johnny were arguing in 2003 in court that in matters of national security the judiciary has no right to “second guess” the executive branch. We’ve been halfway here for a long goddamn time and there’s nothing I’ve read over at Teh Stoopid Buffet that’s giving me any comfort in re: the NYT deciding that if the president says it’s legal then it is, which is making the way certain things got ignored over the years make a hell of … Continue reading Conyers

Hi, Russ! Sen. Russ Feingold has become a familiar face in the showdown pitting the White House against the Senate over renewal of the USA Patriot Act. On Monday, the Wisconsin Democrat jump-started his day on the NBC-TV “Today” show. Later, he and two colleagues faced dozens of cameras in giving the party’s response to Bush’s news conference. Feingold capped the media blitz for the day by appearing with an opponent on the Patriot Act issue, Texas Republican Sen. John Cornyn, on “The NewsHour with Jim Lehrer” on PBS. Oh, and can we please put to death this “electability” nonsense? … Continue reading He’s Pretty And He’s Sexy And All The Girlies Want Him

From Holden: OK, before we launch ourselves into Little Scottie’s spin regarding Chimpy’s extra-constitutional spying lend an ear (eye?) to Helen Thomas. Q The President has publicly acknowledged that we went to war under false information, mistaken information. Why does he insist on staying there if we were there falsely, and continue to kill Iraqis? MR. McCLELLAN: Well, maybe you missed some of his recent speeches and his remarks, but the President said it was the right decision to remove Saddam Hussein and his regime from power — Q And a right decision to move in and to tell the … Continue reading Today on Holden’s Obsession with the Gaggle

From Holden: Dammit, I wish I had a good source for the morning gaggle transcript. The gaggle summary written by Wendy Wang of TalkRadio NewsService gives you a taste, but I would love to see that actual give and take between Little Scottie and an aroused press corps. Asked about the President’s authority to issue an executive order giving the NSA authority to conduct surveillance, McClellan cited that Article II under the Constitution gave Bush the necessary and appropriate authority to issue this order as we are facing a different kind of enemy and we are fighting a different kind … Continue reading Morning Gaggle a Doozy

From Holden: Judd Leggum caught Condi defending Chimpy’s illegal spying to Wolf Blitzer last night. The President spoke to this earlier and the Attorney General, who is, after all, the highest legal authority in the country, has spoken to this. Yeah, the AG is the “highest legal authority in the country” alright. That’s why he has to plead before all those federal judges, not to mention the Supreme Court. Note to Condi: the “Supreme” in the name “Supreme Court” is a bit of a tip-off as to just where ultimate legal authority resides. Continue reading OK, Condi Is Just Stupid

From Holden: Yet another of my home county prosecutors, David Escamia, is taking a long look at Ralph Reed for failure to register as a lobbyist. [Ralph] Reed secretively worked Texas officials and the Legislature to kill pro-gambling initiatives on behalf of Washington lobbyist Jack Abramoff — and a Louisiana Indian tribe out to protect its casino. He even pitched Abramoff what he called a multimillion-dollar “TX Political Plan” targeting three Democratic state senators and four House members in 2002. One of Reed’s weapons of choice was automated phone banks, according to documents released by a U.S. Senate committee. This … Continue reading Don’t Mess With Texas

From Holden: Last week’s election in Iraq was a success, if by “success” you mean it furthered the alienation of Sunnis… Sunni Arabs on Tuesday challenged partial election results released a day earlier, calling them a “falsification of the will of the people” and saying evidence of fraud was abundant. [snip] The Iraqi Accordance Front, a coalition of three major Sunni Arab groups, rejected those results, warning of “grave repercussions on security and political stability” if the mistakes were not corrected. If no measures are taken, said Adnan al-Dulaimi, head of the alliance, “we will demand that the elections be … Continue reading More Progress in Iraq

Lewis: Lewis is the first major House figure to suggest impeaching Bush. “Its a very serious charge, but he violated the law,” said Lewis, a former civil rights leader. “The president should abide by the law. He deliberately, systematically violated the law. He is not King, he is president.” The opinion that Lewis should chill: Though it would obviously make me dance the dance of infinite glee, I fear that getting rid of Bush via impeachment would be a hollow victory. The better, smarter way to address the domestic spying scandal (well, it will be a scandal until a white … Continue reading The Impeachment Topic

I say we draft Tena. A. Continue reading Texas Republicans Need An Asskicking

From Holden: No gaggle (yet) today, but Attorney General Alberto “Abu Al” Gonzales and General Michael Hayden, Principal Deputy Director for National Intelligence fought a rearguard action against the impeachment issues nipping at Chimpy’s heals. Their first mistake was inviting Helen Thomas into their briefing. Q I wanted to ask you a question. Do you think the government has the right to break the law? ATTORNEY GENERAL GONZALES: Absolutely not. I don’t believe anyone is above the law. Q You have stretched this resolution for war into giving you carte blanche to do anything you want to do. ATTORNEY GENERAL … Continue reading Today on Holden’s Obsession with the Constitution

From Holden: Government by executive fiat is all one big joke. And your media agree. THE PRESIDENT: You asked a multiple-part question. Q Yes, I did. THE PRESIDENT: Thank you for violating the multiple-part question rule. Q I didn’t know there was a law on that. (Laughter.) THE PRESIDENT: There’s not a law. It’s an executive order. (Laughter.) In this case, not monitored by the Congress — (laughter) — nor is there any administrative oversight. (Laughter.) Continue reading It’s All A Big Joke

From Tena: “The government will make use of these powers only insofar as they are essential for carrying out vitally necessary measures… The number of cases in which an internal necessity exists for having recourse to such a law is in itself a limited one.” Adolf Hitler, March 23rd, 1933 [thanks to pseudonymous in nc in comments at Eschaton for the tip.] Continue reading They all say the same things; always have, always will

From Holden: I hope everyone has their Fitzmas stockings hung with great care, as Jason Leopold updates us on the latest in the Plame case. …Fitzgerald is said to believe that there is a possibility Rove either hid or destroyed evidence related to his role in the leak, lawyers close to the case said. [snip] According to those familiar with the case, in February 2004, Fitzgerald had already obtained the cooperation of a key witness, former Deputy National Security Adviser for Vice President Dick Cheney, John Hannah. Hannah agreed to cooperate with Fitzgerald when the special prosecutor uncovered evidence tying … Continue reading Rove In Deep Shit

From Holden: Here’s my nominee for worst performance on Meet the Press for the year 2005. SEC’Y RICE: The president is acting under his constitutional authority, under statutory authority. I’m not a lawyer, but the president has gone to great lengths to make certain that he is both living under his obligations to protect Americans from another attack but also to protect their civil liberties. And that’s why this program is very carefully controlled. [snip] MR. RUSSERT: The law is very clear that a person is guilty of an offense unless they get a court order before seeking to wiretap … Continue reading The Unbearable Lightness of Being Condi

From Holden: DeLay can forget about resolving his Texas difficulties before the House reconvenes on Jan. 31. A state district judge on Saturday dealt U.S. Rep. Tom DeLay a setback in his quest for a trial in January. Judge Pat Priest canceled a Dec. 27 pre-trial hearing and refused to rule on whether DeLay, charged with conspiracy and money laundering, could be tried in early January on just the money-laundering charge. Instead, Priest will take no action until a higher court weighs in on the question of whether a separate conspiracy charge against DeLay should be reinstated. The decision could … Continue reading DeLay Delayed

From Holden: The following is an incomplete list of individuals whose telephone calls and e-mail messages were monitored by the National Security Agency pursuant to an executive order signed by George Bush allowing surveillance of American citizens without a warrant. Joseph Wilson Valerie Plame John Kerry John Edwards Howard Dean Nancy Pelosi Harry Reid Al Gore Bill Clinton Hillary Clinton Richard Clarke Colin Powell John McCain Chuck Hagel Michael Moore Cindy Sheehan Brent Scrowcroft Think I’m kidding? Think again. Why assume that this Assministration, which revealed the identity of a covert CIA agent in order to silence a political foe, … Continue reading Chimpy’s List