Steve goes Deadwood on some people who richly deserve it. The “Draft a Pundit for Jesus” movement has been going on for a while now, mostly focused on people like Jonah Goldberg, who says he can’t afford to go to Iraq. I’d like to propose a similar program for bloggers like the fine folks at Powerline and Little Miss Michelle, who are so quick to call journalists on the ground liars and murderers. Go to Iraq, Ass Missile. Go to Iraq, Michelle. Report from the ground on all the schools being painted, all the successful counterinsurgency operations, all the wonderful … Continue reading Mr. Moran, meet Mr. Wu

From Holden: A little tid-bit regarding today’s baboon-a-palooza event in New York: Tickets allowing lucky audience members inside to hear the president at the school were colored red, blue or gold. James Bock, 12, of Livonia, Livingston County, and five members of his family learned they had “golden” tickets, which mean they’ll sit on stage with the president. Cited at Froomkin’s place. Continue reading Chimpy and the Chocolate Factory

A friend once told me about a corollary to the “freshman fifteen.” The “newlywed fifteen.” Get married, gain weight. Well, it was certainly true in my case. I try not to do the chick thing of obsessing about my figure, because really, it’s not like my work is dependent on my hips being a certain circumference. But when I was single, I rarely ate more than a bowl of pasta or a salad every day. I subsisted on coffee and the day-old bagel bin at my friend Steve’s bakery. Then I moved in with Mr. Athenae, got hitched, and suddenly … Continue reading Love Is Good For You

From Holden: Sen. George Voinovich is circulating a letter to his colleagues opposing John Bolton. The letter from Senator George R. Voinovich was sent to all senators, but it was aimed particularly at fellow Republicans in a chamber in which the party holds a 55-44 majority (with one independent). At least five Republicans would have to join Mr. Voinovich in opposing Mr. Bolton if the nomination were to be defeated. In the letter, Mr. Voinovich said that while he had been “hesitant to push my views on my colleagues” during his years in the Senate, he felt “compelled to share … Continue reading Voinovich!

From Holden: Commenter Silleigh points me to this post in which Keith Olbermann finally discovers my buddy Les. Continue reading Olbermann Should Read First Draft

From Holden: Two head-spinning lines from Chimpy’s little embryo adoption event today: The children here today are reminders that every human life is a precious gift of matchless value. And: We should not use public money to support the further destruction of human life. I could post some shocking images of the dead and mutilated children of Iraq, but what is the point? Why rubber-neck at the carnage? The man is the biggest ass on the planet, we all have known that for some time now. Continue reading Ass

From Holden: Attaturk has the skinny at Eschaton. Continue reading Feith Aide Charged With Removing Top Secret Documents on Osama

From Holden: Just a quick gaggle today aboard Air Force One as the president flew to upstate New York to lie about Social Security. And and for those of you playing at home, the shot-words in today’s Little Scottie drinking game are “real progress”. Q What is the reaction to the filibuster? MR. McCLELLAN: I talked to a few of you — or a few of your colleagues last night. I do expect that the President will say something at the beginning of his remarks today, at the conversation. Yesterday, these judicial nominees that the Senate is now moving forward … Continue reading Today on Holden’s Obsession with the Gaggle

From Holden: Nightline will do it again. One year since honoring the American service men and women killed in Iraq and Afghanistan, Ted Koppel and ABC News “Nightline” will again pay tribute to the fallen by devoting an extended broadcast to reading the names and showing the photographs of more than 900 service members who have been killed in those countries over the last year. Titled “The Fallen,” the special “Nightline” broadcast will air Memorial Day, Monday, May 30, 2005, at 11:35 p.m. ET on the ABC Television Network. ABC News Radio will air excerpts of the program. Last year … Continue reading Maybe Ted Koppel Did Not Get The Note

From Holden: Chimpy took his Social Security demolition derby to Greece, New York, today where we witnessed a startling brush with the truth. THE PRESIDENT: I’m sorry Laura is not here. Yes, you’d probably rather have her here than me, wouldn’t you? Q We didn’t say that. THE PRESIDENT: Well, no, but you thought it. You didn’t say it, but I could tell you thought it. You’re not the only person here who feels that way, I want you to know. We also saw the old Baboon-a-palooza standard denial that there is indeed a Social Security Trust Fund. Your payroll … Continue reading Baboon-a-palooza Heads Upstate

From Holden: Compared to the Coalition Provisional Authority, when it comes to stealing the country’s oil wealth the Interrim Government of Iraq was amteurish at best. But at least they tried. Iraqi officials cannot explain what happened to $69 million worth of fuel oil produced in the second half of 2004, raising fears that it was smuggled out of the country for private gain, according to a report by UN-appointed auditors. The report, by the auditing firm KPMG, was released Monday. The auditors said Iraq’s recorded exports of fuel oil mysteriously declined by a comparable amount during that same period … Continue reading Iraqi Amateurs Steal Only $69 Million

From Holden: This morning I asked, “On what day did we last experience no U.S. troop deaths in Iraq?” The Answer: December 17, 2004, 158 days ago. Of course your president thinks this is a sign that the insurgents are being defeated. Continue reading Do You Remember When? The Answer

From Holden: Your president, yesterday. Afghanistan is no longer a safe haven for terrorists. Um, uh – George? Continue reading Looks Pretty Safe To Me

From Holden: At least we got Priscilla Owen off of the Texas Supreme Court. Continue reading Glass Half Full

From Holden: On what day did we last experience no U.S. troop deaths in Iraq? Answer later. Continue reading Do You Remember When?

Harry said today: “We have sent President George Bush, Vice President Dick Cheney and the radical right of the Republican party an undeniable message….the abuse of power will not be tolerated.” The deal that was reached is good for Democrats in the following ways. They might very well have lost the vote, and been stuck with James Dobson’s choice on the Supreme Court because we would have had no chance to filibuster. Given the choice of Owen and Brown or Mr. Justice Gonzales, I’ll take Owen and Brown, thanks. The nuclear option is no more, folks. It’s gone. Thank you, … Continue reading God For Harry, The Filibuster, and St. George

From Holden: I usually try to cover the gaggle in the order that the questions were asked. Although the following question came late during today’s festivities it is such a good one I’m bumping it to the top. Q Scott, last week you said that claims in the leaked Downing Street memo that intelligence was being fixed to support the Iraq War as early as July 2002 are flat-out wrong. According to the memo which was dated July 23, 2002, and whose authenticity has not been disputed by the British Government, both Foreign Minister Jack Straw and British Intelligence Chief … Continue reading Today on Holden’s Obsession with the Gaggle

From Holden: TBogg already covered the all-to-predictable Freeper reaction to the Tillman family’s very public complaints about Penatgon lies and presidential opportunism. I expected to hear nary a whisper of the affair voiced by the denizens of The Corner, which has been their pattern whenever facts collide with their worship of Dear Leader. But I forgot about the new kid, and sure enough JohnnyPod filled the gap left by his more intelligent (and hypocritical) comrades only to retract the post after checking the dictionary. Continue reading Fools Rush In

From Holden: Your president hosted a visit from colonial governor Hamid Karzai today. So, how do you identify a democracy? PRESIDENT BUSH: And so Mr. President, thank you for your leadership. We’re looking forward to watching and helping make sure these elections go forward in a peaceful — peaceful manner. It’s a — the number of candidates that — who have filed are — is quite impressive. I think you maybe told me over 5,000? PRESIDENT KARZAI: Over 5,000. PRESIDENT BUSH: Yes, 5,000 people have filed for office. It’s a — it’s a — democracy is — democracy is flourishing. … Continue reading Your President Speaks

From Holden: Palm Beach County prosecutors who want to examine Rush Limbaugh’s medical records for their prescription drug abuse investigation are going to court Monday in hopes of having that evidence released. [snip] Limbaugh’s attorneys fought the seizures [of his medical records], claiming a violation of privacy rights. But last month the Florida Supreme Court declined to hear his appeal, clearing the way for prosecutors to finally look over the records. Link. Continue reading Pill-Popping Fat Ass Back In Court Today

From Holden: Looks like the Department of Fatherland Security pioneered the Coalition Provisional Authority business model. Since fiscal 2001, annual spending on contracts managed by the Department of Homeland Security or its precursor agencies has more than doubled, to $5.8 billion, according to data from Eagle Eye Publishers Inc., a company that analyzes government contracting data. The beneficiaries include Unisys Corp., Boeing Co., Lockheed Martin Corp., General Dynamics Corp. and Accenture Ltd., along with such lesser-known companies as Veritas Capital Inc. and Datatrac Information Services Inc. At a recent gathering of contractors in northern Virginia, the chief contracting officer for … Continue reading Are We Safer Yet?

From Holden: Fanatical supporters of American traitor Jonathan Pollard got pretty darn close to Laura Bush over the weekend. Photo by Brian Snyder/Reuters She may have tried to downplay the hostility she faced, but there’s no hiding her discomfort. AP/Emilio Morenatti Continue reading No Joking

From Holden: The Iraqi insurgency realizes that without security there will be no reconstruction, no political reform, and no peace. So they are hitting the hired guns, hard. These contractors and officials point to the surprising level of planning and brutality involved in a May 8 attack on the British security company Hart Security Ltd., which provides protection to convoys, homes and individuals in Iraq. [snip] Twelve out of 18 Iraqi and international guards were killed in the attack, in which insurgents ambushed a convoy escorting cargo for the U.S. forces from Baghdad to a base in al-Asat, about 90 … Continue reading No Security, No Peace

From Holden: TBogg writes the post about the Tillman family’s reaction to the Bush assministration’s use of their son’s corpse that I would have written if I blogged on weekends. Yeah, that’s just what I would have written. Continue reading Tillman

From Holden: Tell me, would a three-month sentence for a torture-killing help or hinder U. S. efforts to bolster our image in Afghanistan? Continue reading Newsweek… Musta Been Newsweek

From Holden: You can’t be more Bobo than small town Texas. A North Texas school district has apologized to a student who was listed under the name “Black Girl” in a high school yearbook photo of the school’s National Honor Society. All white students are identified by name in the photograph in the Waxahachie High School yearbook, which was distributed Friday. The teen identified as “Black Girl” is the only black student in the photo. The label was apparently meant to be a placeholder until the yearbook staff could track down the student’s name, district spokeswoman Candace Ahlfinger said in … Continue reading Bobo’s World

From Holden: What tangled webs we weave. A Congressional committee investigating whether Mr. Abramoff defrauded Indian tribes has subpoenaed records from Mr. Norquist’s group, Americans for Tax Reform, after he refused for six months to turn them over voluntarily. The Justice Department is reviewing records of an advocacy group Mr. Norquist started with Gale A. Norton, now secretary of the interior, after reports that Mr. Abramoff instructed Indian tribes to give it $250,000. And Mr. Norquist’s name appears over and over in newly disclosed documents outlining Mr. Abramoff’s work in the Northern Mariana Islands, an American protectorate in the Pacific, … Continue reading Abramoff Taking Norquist With Him

Harry listens to Oliver. Everybody should listen to Oliver. Look, I’ve been following this NARAL nightmare over at Kos and this is where I come down on it. An anti-abortion Democrat as part of the overall pro-choice Democratic majority will not act in a way that will outlaw abortion. Harry Reid opposes abortion. If by some remarkable turn of events we take back the Senate in 2006, will Majority Leader Harry Reid introduce parental notification legislation and a host of other measures designed to punish poor women in order to make points with white men? Would Harry Reid, had he … Continue reading This Would Be Pretty Smart, Actually

Nice. A. Continue reading Department of Why They Hate Us, Vol. 357,001