Category Archives: Stupid Republican Tricks

I want to meet Mick Mulvaney…

I want to meet Mick Mulvaney, this man of billions who has the audacity to call people like my mother-in-law thieves.

She sat in a hospital recliner this week with a giant blackening scar running down her leg as a stream of people she barely knew entered and exited at a rapid pace, spewing information into her stroke-impaired mind. She looked like a child who had lost her mother at the grocery store as doctors changed orders and nurses took readings, her eyes darting from one to the other as they spoke over her in multi-syllabic jargon.

She had put off a knee replacement until she cleared 65 so that her Medicare would help cover the bills. Each day, she rose on two dysfunctional joints that had worn ligaments, cartilage and bone. Her entire left side remained frozen in a tense and contracted state, the result of a massive stroke several years back.

The doctor decided to do her “good” leg first, so it could heal and provide the most support. When my wife protested, the doctor noted it was the only way to move forward with this. He also promised she’d be “good as new” after her two-night stay in the hospital and ready to go home.

My wife knew better.

Her mother couldn’t go but short distances without pain or exhaustion and that was when the “good” leg was working. Her bladder failed her often, as she tried desperately to make it to the bathroom before suffering the indignity of asking for a fresh nightgown. She rarely left the house and her movement was mostly confined to a wheelchair.

She needed a lot of rehab and she would need a nursing home to do it, my wife argued. The doctor didn’t think so at the time, but he eventually came around to it. However, the rule of Medicare is a three-midnight stay, or no nursing home.

My mother-in-law spent most of her two days in a drug-induced haze of opiates and numbing agents as we kept trying to figure out with these people how all this would work. By the time they had us convinced if we were there 24/7, we could keep her at home, they changed their mind and set up a nursing home bed.

The cost was more than $350 per day, not counting therapy and meds. Mom subsists on about $800 of social security and a $200 pension, the result of decades in the Catholic school system.

She cashed in her state pension, earned through years of working at northwoods schools near the UP of Michigan, a total of $8,000, but the nursing home needed two weeks up front.

As these numbers and costs and such flew around her head, I saw her bright blue eyes and I almost broke.

If the eyes are truly the windows to the soul, her eyes showed terror; they had the look of a child witnessing an unspeakable act. They told of loss, panic and fear rolled into one.

This is why I want to meet Mick Mulvaney.

I want him to see those eyes and tell her how this budget he proposed can be anything but a decimating blow to people like her who have no hope but the mercy of the government.

I want him to drive out to this rural town of 3,300, many of whom voted for his boss, and call my mother-in-law a thief. This woman, who once was horrified that her father taught her child to grab a grape from the grocery store and try it before buying it, is a thief?

I want him to stand there and explain how she’s not a taxpayer who put up with so much in her life to support a family of five and worked until she was physically unable to any more.

I want him, with that “Leprechaun-meets-Jack-Torrance” look on his face, to say to her, “I’m sorry you’re hurting, but that’s not my problem. This nation has bills to pay.”

If this country is worth anything, it’s because of people like my mother-in-law. She spent her life teaching Sunday school to poor children and working with the autistic kids whom society discarded. She kept food on the table and her family in line for nighttime meals and homework sessions. She pushed herself out of pure American grit: The idea that you don’t take from others, but you work so you can give back.

When people like her break down, it’s not out of greed or laziness or a sense that they are owed something. It’s because something happened beyond their control and they need the rest of us to say, “Relax. We got this.”

Tax cuts don’t do that. Medicine does.

GDP growth charts don’t do that. Safety nets do.

This is something the Mick Mulvaneys of the world will never get: Money isn’t everything. It’s what we do with the money that defines our humanity.

GOP Impulse Control Blues: Greg The Goon & The Insane President Posse

Trump spawn and Greg the Goon. Photo via the Toronto Star.

A venerable expression of disputed origin that I’ve been using for years has become a cliché or truism. There’s a reason for that: “a fish rots from the head down” is true. It certainly applies to the Republican Party whose members have gotten crazier and crazier since the Insult Comedian became its bull goose loony. One wouldn’t think that impulse control would be a problem for candidates and office-holders, but it is in the New Gilded Age. Trump sets the tone for his party.  It’s an ugly and discordant tone; not unlike skinhead thrash metal complete with guttural vocals. Tremendous. Believe me.

I suspect you’ve all heard about the special behavior exhibited by Montana special election candidate/rich Republican malaka Greg (The Goon) Gianforte. He assaulted Guardian reporter Ben Jacobs last night. Jacobs’ offense was asking a question about Trumpcare. Gianforte does not like the Guardian because they wrote a piece about his ties to Russian companies. (Why is it always Russia with these fuckers?) Greg the Goon has been charged with misdemeanor assault for body slamming the bespectacled journalist. He should be charged with rampant mendacity as his campaign’s account is contradicted by a Fox News crew’s account:

Fox News reporter Alicia Acuna, field producer Faith Mangan and photographer Keith Railey witnessed the incident at Gianforte’s campaign headquarters in Montana, according to an account published on the Fox News website. After Jacobs asked Gianforte his question, Acuna wrote: “Gianforte grabbed Jacobs by the neck with both hands and slammed him into the ground behind him.

“Faith, Keith and I watched in disbelief as Gianforte then began punching the man, as he moved on top the reporter and began yelling something to the effect of ‘I’m sick and tired of this!’ … To be clear, at no point did any of us who witnessed this assault see Jacobs show any form of physical aggression toward Gianforte, who left the area after giving statements to local sheriff’s deputies.”

That’s right, Fox Fucking News; the home of Sean Hannity’s falling ratings. I wish I could say I was surprised that many GOPers defended Greg the Goon. Said defense inspired a brisk rejoinder from Never Trump conservative Rick Wilson. Here are the first three tweets of a 12-part tweet storm:

Yeah, you right, Rick. The president* has brought the WWE mentality to national politics. Only the impulse control impaired party practices it. You guessed it: the GOP. It’s not very grand of them is it? G should be for goon from now on.

It’s a pity that Greg the Goon may still body slam his way to victory. The downside of early voting is that 50% of the ballots have been cast. The race, however, has been tightening and Montana has election day registration. The assault cost Greg the Goon some newspaper endorsements. The Missoulian don’t play that.

Greg the Goon isn’t the only Republican having impulse control issues. The GOP’s bull goose loony, president* Trump has them as well and in a more lethal form.

I am referring, of course, to Trump’s propensity to leak classified information whilst in the throes of braggadocio. In addition to his Oval Office exploits with the Russian Foreign Minister and GRU Rezident/Ambassador. Trump bragged to fellow insane President Rodrigo Duterte of the Philipines about submarine positions. This is a big no-no: loose lips sink ships, especially subs. Submarines by their nature are stealthy. It would be a mistake for Trump to tell the leaders of Britain, France, or Japan let alone a member of the Insane President Posse.

British Prime Minister Theresa May is pissed off at Team Trump for leaking details about the Manchester bombing including the name of the alleged bomber. May plans to admonish Trump but it’s unlikely to have any impact. One doesn’t learn impulse control at age 70. Besides, Trump never listens to women even Brexiteering ones.

We’re at a depressing stage in the history of the Republic. One of our major parties is in the hands of a leader who reflects all of its worst qualities. The few diehard Never Trump GOPers are not office-holders but people like Rick Wilson, Ana Navarro, Evan McMullin, and David Frum. Congressional Republicans are content to be pro-Trump as long as they think he’ll sign anything they send to him. The good news is that scandals like the Russian affair have a way of paralyzing government, especially when the Insult Comedian’s specialty is making things worse.

I’ll give Peter Gabriel the last word with a song from the PG3 aka Melt album. Greg the Goon certainly had a meltdown last night as well as no impulse control whatsoever.

At the risk of being branded a last word liar, I came up with the second part of the post title after it was written. The piece was too tight to disrupt, so here it is. Greg the Goon & The Insane President Posse is a helluva band name innit?  I see them riding off into the sunset on their pygmy ponies after checking out the dental floss bushes. You really didn’t think I’d do a post about the place Gus McCrae always called Montany without mentioning Zappa did you?

Really Disabled

When you get right down to it everybody is just mooching off the system, right?

Everybody on welfare’s driving Cadillacs and everybody on food stamps is buying candy and everybody in Section 8 housing is just dealing drugs. The homeless by the highway are scamming you and kids who need lunch money are scamming you and that woman speaking Spanish in the grocery store might be talking about you and a guy who was panhandling once had a cell phone and oh my Cylon god, basically.

WHO HAS TIME FOR ALL THIS SHIT?

I mean it, who? The other day I was trying to figure out if I could make a haircut appointment for after my kid went to bed so I wouldn’t miss any more time with her because all I do is work and we’re selling our house and moving to a new house we haven’t found yet so we go to house showings and clean our own house for showings, and I haven’t seen my friends in weeks, and I’m emotionally involved with no less than 14 TV shows right now, and seriously at the moment a mani-pedi takes more time than I have free. Every night I am almost too tired to brush my teeth, and I threw my back out again so I’m limping around trying to quote Richard III like it’s funny.

The very last thing I can do is track if some person on disability could take a shift on the factory line or not.

I’m not being deliberately dense, I know there is an entire propaganda machine dedicated to convincing elderly white folks that this is the case, and I know it’s like candy for your brain, the idea that you are Not King because of some minority person or chick and not because you suck, but when you get right down to it half these loony things only take hold because people have time to pay attention to them so I ask you, can we get America a hobby or something?

Do we need classes to teach everybody to paint and crochet or tell them it’s okay to just ignore the homeless guy instead of inventing a whole story about how that guy is scamming you? You don’t have to give him money but you do have to find something else to talk about, you know? My cousin’s brother’s friend saw a homeless guy by the roadside get into an SUV and drive away, so they’re not really homeless, why is that something you need to tell me? I knew someone who knew someone who’d heard of someone who wasn’t disabled, who just had a headache and lived on disability his whole life because SCAMMERS, and we need to stop paying for programs for which we’ve already taxed people.

How broken in the head do you have to be, sure, to think like this, but also how fundamentally intellectually bankrupt and disinterested in life do you have to be that this takes up this much space in your head?

A.

Oh, the Courage of the GOP

They’re going to finish this, one way or another, and then we’re gonna let them do it again.

Really, Nixon should have died in federal prison, and that should have been the end of that party.

Really, murdering Central American schoolchildren and nuns in order to fight an illegal proxy war should have resulted in the GOP being thrown on the trash fire of history.

Really, tens of thousands of dead Iraqis and Afghans and lies to the entire world about why, that should have caused decent people to turn away from the word “Republican” in disgust.

Really, turning the entire mechanism of federal government into a way to interfere in the Schaivo family’s tragedy should have been enough. Shutting down that same government to oppose health care for poor people, stealing a Supreme Court seat from the first black president, letting their surrogates call that same president illegitimate, promoting Sarah Palin as a real person, I could go on. Any one thing, in a sane world, should have been the end of it.

But we let them up off the mat. We said BUT HER EMAILS and UNLIKEABLE and WHITE WORKING CLASS OPPRESSION, and we said BOTH SIDES and SINCERELY HELD RELIGIOUS BELIEFS and we let them be a real party again.

They’re gonna get rid of Trump and it’ll be like it never happened. It’ll be amazing how much it never happened. People will say “Donald Trump” and it’ll be like us Internet grandparents saying “George W. Bush is not our lovable great-uncle, stop it” and “John Yoo should be in chains” and everybody’s all, “Why can’t you let any of that go, God.”

I mean, just look at this shit:

Like others in Congress, Comer would have a week at home on recess to reconnect with his voters. Typically, a recess is a time for town halls. But this time, most members were not holding any. Comer’s plan was different — to hold four over the next three days.

“The perfect storm,” one aide told him, even as Comer’s Twitter feed showed video clips of a few other members facing angry crowds and stumbling to explain themselves.

“Everybody is ducking for cover right now,” he told her. “Everybody’s had the same advice for me — cancel them.”

But he wasn’t going to.

Wow, he’s going to do basic constituent services. Oh, the bravery. Let’s anoint this fucking guy like he’s Shackleton at the Pole.

He cleared his throat and then started talking about the most controversial thing he had been involved with so far, his vote to repeal the ACA. He said the ACA had deepened the problems in Kentucky by opening up such wide access to Medicaid, the health-care program for low-income Americans. He said so many had signed up across the state that nearly 1 in 3 were now covered under that program — and receiving free coverage. Some of those people, he said, desperately needed that help. But many were feeding off the system.

I’m so glad we’re humanizing this racist piece of shit.

The second town hall was in a county where Trump had won 85 percent of the vote. This time, there were no protesters, and Comer went in through the front door of the courthouse. He was cheered when he walked up to the lectern, and when he said, like Trump, that he wanted to make America great again, he saw 75 people leaning in, listening, not ready to pounce.

So he told his favorite Trump story. Two months earlier, he had flown on Air Force One with the president on the way to a rally in Louisville, and hours later he was returning to Washington in the same plane — only this time, with an invitation to join Trump in his private office. “Yes sir,” Comer said he told the president, and there he sat for 1 ½ hours, across from Trump and right next to Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Ky.), as Trump talked about his plane and his election victory and his health-care plans. The plane landed at Joint Base Andrews, and Trump had another invitation for Comer: Did he want to take the Marine One helicopter back to the White House? Did he want to see the Oval Office?

“Why hello, poor constituents! Let me brag about how Trump let me near him to talk about the size of his electoral dick! Doesn’t that prove we’re all right to take your health care away? SHORE DOES!”

He looked out the window and started talking about the differences between being a politician in Kentucky and in Washington, of civilities and incivilities. “We used to ride together, go to O’Charley’s, go to LongHorn,” he said of the Democrats with whom he served in Frankfort, the state capital. “That never happens in D.C.”

I wonder why.

He rolled up to the last town hall, in Calhoun, population 763. He shook hands with some police officers and the county executive, and soon was standing in front of 75 people. “Trump won this district by 55 points,” he was saying, when a woman interrupted to say, “That’s very sad.”

I don’t know what’s sadder, that a Trump victory somehow proves he’s not a disaster as if terrible people never succeed in this country, or that this douche thinks it’s a defense of anything.

But hey, let’s keep pretending Trump is some kind of outlier, and the rest of the sensible Republican party — these people who talk about government handouts and “turning around” a country with 5 percent unemployment and (finally, some form of) universal health coverage just because it was led by a black guy — is just trying to sincerely gauge whether people still love Trump and, by extension, themselves.

Jesus H. Tits, we really don’t want to get better, do we?

A.

THIS is it, right? Finally? This is finally it?

Surely THIS is it, the thing that will make the GOP rise up against Trump: 

In his meeting with Lavrov, Trump seemed to be boasting about his inside knowledge of the looming threat. “I get great intel. I have people brief me on great intel every day,” the president said, according to an official with knowledge of the exchange.

Trump went on to discuss aspects of the threat that the United States learned only through the espionage capabilities of a key partner. He did not reveal the specific intelligence-gathering method, but he described how the Islamic State was pursuing elements of a specific plot and how much harm such an attack could cause under varying circumstances. Most alarmingly, officials said, Trump revealed the city in the Islamic State’s territory where the U.S. intelligence partner detected the threat.

OF COURSE THIS ISN’T IT. WHAT ARE YOU, NEW?

Several reasons why this — like bragging about sexual assault, threatening federal witnesses, ignoring the Emoluments Clause, and a hundred other things — will not be grounds for impeachment with a GOP Congress (or a cowed Dem one). Let’s start with the easiest: Republicans cannot find their ass with both hands, a searchlight, and a posse. They won in 2016 through a combination of luck and racism, they’ve been screaming for 40 years and don’t know how to do anything else, they are not organized around any principle besides HA HA FUCK YOU LIBTARDS, and so their response to Trump’s idiocy is therefore by necessity kind of “… dude, the hell?”

Also, the few who do have an ideology find that Trump’s idiocy does not imperil that ideology one bit. Paul Ryan can kick poor kids off health insurance and give himself a tax cut regardless of how many secrets Trump blurts over the buffet.

AND, I dunno if you’ve noticed, but national security is not actually their thing. When they’re not humping a stack of aircraft carrier contracts, Republicans in the recent past can be found burning covert operatives, ignoring intelligence briefings about imminent terrorist attacks, setting up secret torture prisons badly enough to have said secret torture prisons found out, and generally sticking our national dick in any bees’ nest they happen upon. They’re not going to suddenly start giving a shit about things like the lives of U.S. assets, not when it’s a GOP president endangering them.

Jesus Aloysius Tits, I can keep explaining it for the cheap seats but I can’t understand it for you: THE GOP IS NOT GOING TO SAVE US FROM THE MONSTER IT CREATED. Two or three senators are going to shake their heads on the Sunday shows and not do anything otherwise. I get that it is fun to continue to play Political Sims, where you are suddenly the Hero Who Bucks His Party and Rises Up to Save the Republic, but at this point it’s just embarrassing. Stop it.

Continually hoping for a GOP savior from this mess is not only futile. It actively disappears the people — primarily women, and people of color — who have NEVER bought into Trump’s bullshit, never voted for him, never helped get him elected, and are leading the damn resistance while everybody else is writing fanfic for major papers about how maybe THIS TIME instead of the other 497 times, this time the GOP will grow a spine.

A.

Today on Tommy T’s Obsession with the Freeperati – “Fail to the chief” edition

Well, double-check those airlock doors, because this one’s gonna be a stinkeroo!

Trump Warns Comey and Says He May Cancel Press Briefings
New York Times ^ | May 12, 2017 | PETER BAKER

Posted on 5/12/2017, 8:33:36 AM by reaganaut1

WASHINGTON — President Trump on Friday warned James B. Comey, the former F.B.I. director he fired this week, against leaking anything negative about the president and warned the news media that he may cancel all future White House briefings.

In a series of early-morning Twitter posts, Mr. Trump even seemed to suggest that there may be secret tapes of his conversations with Mr. Comey that could be used to counter the former F.B.I. director if necessary. It was not immediately clear whether he meant that literally or simply hoped to intimidate Mr. Comey into silence.

“James Comey better hope that there are no ‘tapes’ of our conversations before he starts leaking to the press!” Mr. Trump wrote on Twitter.

Mr. Trump appeared agitated

In other breaking news, water appears wet!

over news reports on Friday that focused on contradictory accounts of his decision to fire Mr. Comey at the same time the F.B.I. is investigating ties between Mr. Trump’s associates and Russia.

**************

Trump should get off Twitter. He sounds unstable, not what you want in a President.
1 posted on 5/12/2017, 8:33:36 AM by reaganaut1
Sounds unstable?
SOUNDS unstable???
To: reaganaut1

 

I can’t disagree, just have a high ranking WH official make the call.

2 posted on 5/12/2017, 8:36:01 AM by seeker41 (Free the USA-eliminate globalist causes and return to the constitution)

Meanwhile, there’s battle lines being drawn…
To: reaganaut1

 

You need to put down the Fake Stream News Kool-Aid.

President Trump is doing just fine, and I am glad he’s calling out the swap.

It’s about time!

Go President Trump!

3 posted on 5/12/2017, 8:36:06 AM by Enlightened1

To: reaganaut1

 

This is going south in a major way.

19 posted on 5/12/2017, 8:47:58 AM by babble-on

To: reaganaut1

 

Nonsense.

I hope he doubles his tweets.

20 posted on 5/12/2017, 8:49:04 AM by UKrepublican

That makes two of us. I also hope that he starts screaming at press conferences, throwing things, and cutting himself.
To: reaganaut1

 

I agree, his tweets are making things worse, not better. There are too many “Support everything Trump does or you must love Hillary” types on here.

37 posted on 5/12/2017, 9:25:53 AM by linear (The truth brooks no arbiters.)

And last, but not least:
To: reaganaut1
“Trump should get off Twitter.” 

So, then you’re theory is Trump should not attempt to bypass the enemedia

FreudOnVacation

and communicate directly with the people, but should instead let the people hear only the lying voices of CNN/CBS/ABC/CBS and what they CLAIM Trump said?

Not to mention, the enemedia

Freudianfieldday

proclaims 24x7x365 every day since he was nominated that he is “unstable”, regardless of what he says or does.

Oh, and Trump doesn’t sound unstable to me. He simply sounds like Trump has always sounded.

83 posted on 5/12/2017, 1:21:17 PM by catnipman ( Cat Nipman: Vote Republican in 2012 and only be called racist one more time!)

Unstable. Quelle’ suprise!
Some older stuff below the virtual fold.

Continue reading

Tagged , , , , , , , ,

Tweet Of The Day: Don’t Know Much About (Virginia) History

I’m on some right-wing email lists. I like to know what the enemy is up to. One such group is obsessed with “drafting” Laura Ingraham to challenge Tim Kaine in 2018. If it happens, she needs to brush up on her Virginia history.

As everyone should know, Monticello was Thomas Jefferson’s crib. George Washington lived at Mount Vernon. I bet Ingraham thinks he lived in the White House as well.

Virginians take their history seriously. She hurt her chances in Albemarle County, which is where “Washington’s Monticello” is located.

The Commonwealth of Virginia is afflicted with right-wing transplants who move there and run for office: Ken Cuccinelli, Corey Stewart, and possibly Laura Ingraham. I hope you noted that I was polite and didn’t call them carpetbaggers. I’m working on my manners, y’all.

I suppose I should be gratified that she’s following events in New Orleans. I just wish she’d get her facts straight. If she decides to run against my man Tim, she needs a crash course in Virginia history. Now that I think of it, she shouldn’t bother. I had a twitter exchange on that very subject:

One more thing. Ingraham should learn an old Virginia adage: Virginia history is American history. One would think she’d know better: she attended James Monroe’s University of Virginia, after all. I could do this all day but I won’t. That would be strictly for the Byrds.

I’ll give the Other Byrds the last word with a song dedicated to the Lost Causers sitting hillbilly shiva at the former Jefferson Davis Monument. More on that later.

Easy Comey, Easy Go Redux

Longtime readers are aware of my fondness for cartoon imagery. On Monday, I gave you the Le Pew meets Le Pen post. Hearing the news that the president* had fired James Comey conjured up images of Wile E. Coyote lighting a bomb and it blowing up in his face. Meep, meep. It also allowed me to recycle a classic post title. Heckuva job, Donald.

As the Insult Comedian himself would put it:  it’s so very, very, very nice of him to fire Comey because he was so very mean to Crooked Hillary.  You know, the action that helped elect Trump. I did such a tremendous spit take when I heard that whopper that Della and Oscar ran for cover even though it interrupted their nightly food bowl vigil. Sorry, y’all. Talk about failing the smell test. That excuse was stinkier than a post-Katrina fridge. I somehow think it had more to do with the Russia investigation and the bad news on that front that emerged out of the Yates-Clapper hearing.

I know a cover up when I see one. This is a cover up. The good news for the Republic is that Trump never has a plan, he’s always winging it. If the preternaturally devious Tricky Dick couldn’t run a cover up, what chance does a clownishly inept president* with cotton candy piss hair have? He also has an administration* full of guys like Jonah on Veep. Not even his little buddy Jared can save the skipper from himself:

Hat Tip: Michael Tisserand.

Like Athenae, I’m skeptical that Congressional Republicans will dump Trump in the short term. The most cynical politician in recent memory, Mitch McConnell, has already defended the firing and rejected calls for an independent counsel. Mike Huckabee’s horrid spawn, Sarah, wants the country to move on and Kellyanne resurfaced from exile to praise her master. Astonishingly, the administration* didn’t anticipate the firestorm. I think they consulted with Jonad and he told them not to sweat it.

There have been many comparisons to the Saturday Night Massacre of Watergate infamy. It’s an inexact one with a major exception: both presidents fired someone investigating misconduct by their campaigns and administrations. The comparisons inspired some, uh, inspired trolling:

No, Tricky impulsively fired the AG, Deputy AG, and the Watergate Special Prosecutor. The impact will EVENTUALLY be similar. The wheels of the legal system grind slowly, but I think that some sort of special counsel is inevitable. It’s the only way the DOJ and FBI can regain their tattered credibility. The White House doesn’t have to worry about that. It never had any to begin with.

As to Comey himself, he deserved to be fired but not at this time and in this manner. Timing is everything and firing him in the wake of the Yates-Clapper hearing makes the Insult Comedian look guiltier than a bank robber caught in the act. It’s particularly funny that a man who made his name firing people to their faces on teevee didn’t have the guts to call Comey and use his own catchphrase: “You’re fired.”

It will be fascinating to see this play out. Given Trump’s eerie ability to make a bad situation worse, he may hire a political hack to replace Comey. How about a certain former US Attorney and New York Mayor? Now that would be hilarious.

I have some unsolicited advice for the president* put the fucking phone down and stop tweeting. It’s obvious that the Insult Comedian never learned the first rule of holes: when you’re in one, stop digging.

Programming note: I haven’t written my Americans recap yet. It will go up later this evening or tomorrow morning. I’ve been too busy pondering real Russian spies to write about fictional ones.

I’ll give Stevie Wonder the last word with his 1974 Nixon/Watergate song. It feels quite relevant in 2017:

 

Screaming Makes the Headaches Worse

Your gentle reminder that congressional Republicans could have stopped this long ago:

Trump will be running the country from federal prison, texting executive orders to Jared and Ivanka via burner phones smuggled in from the Russian mob, before Paul Ryan bestirs himself from his seat to issue a sternly worded rebuke. Come on. The reason so many people are sitting back and laughing at this constant shitshow is that ABSENT A GENUINE OPPOSITION PARTY IN CONGRESS THERE’S LITERALLY NOTHING ELSE TO DO. Fuck the GOP. This is on them.

This party pardoned Nixon and cheered on W’s wars and were completely fine with Mitt Romney declaring half the United States a bunch of welfare cheats. This party nominated and supported a man who bragged about sexual assault, ignored perjury by a sitting Attorney General, stripped health care from millions of goddamn kids and with their next breath cracked open some beers. They have no interest in holding Trump — or any other Republican — accountable because it garners them nothing.

They control Congress. They control almost every state legislature. They hold governorships from sea to shining sea. What profit do they seek they can’t obtain by simply sitting still? They’re rational actors. Power protects itself, first last and always. Until the American people show them they have no power that can’t be taken away if they displease us, I’m straining to think of a way this goes anywhere.

Congressional Republicans could have stopped this when Trump’s rallies turned into Nuremberg Lite. They could have stopped this when his people yelled LOCK HER UP. They could have stopped it when he said, “Grab them by the pussy.” They could have stopped it after the Muslim ban. After he fired Sally Yates. After he declined to hire people to run the government. After his kids hawked their wares on government property. After the 478th unhinged midnight tweet.

That we actually think they’re gonna stop it now is a testament to how seriously we take a white dude losing a job.

I would love to be wrong about this. I would love for this to finally be the bridge too far. I would love for this to be the turning point, but I have to be honest with you. All I see is a straightaway, the GOP clown car barreling down it full speed, with no new direction in sight.

A.

Bomb the Suburbs

Fucking FINALLY, someone pays attention: 

Trump’s real base, the actual backbone of fascism, isn’t poor and working-class voters, but middle-class and affluent whites. Often self-employed, possessed of a retirement account and a home as a nest egg, this is the stratum taken in by Horatio Alger stories. They can envision playing the market well enough to become the next Trump. They haven’t won “big-league,” but they’ve won enough to be invested in the hierarchy they aspire to climb. If only America were made great again, they could become the haute 
bourgeoisie—the storied “1 percent.”

Trump’s most institutionally entrenched middle-class base includes police and Border Patrol unions, whom he promptly unleashed after his inauguration by allowing them free rein in enforcing his vague but terrifying immigration orders, and by appointing an attorney general who would call off investigations into troubled police departments. As wanton as their human-rights atrocities in the years leading up to the Trump era have been, law-enforcement agents are already making their earlier conduct look like a model of restraint. They are Trump’s most passionate supporters and make concrete his contempt for anyone not white, male, and rich.

I’ve been yelling about this for at least five years.

Source.

During the 2011 Wisconsin gubernatorial recall, the reddest parts of the state, which went the hardest for Walker, weren’t purely rural. They were the white-flight suburbs of Milwaukee. People there moved out of the city and nurtured in themselves and their children a story about how black and brown people “ruined” “their” neighborhoods. The city was a shithole out of which they’d been driven, and they were going to get their revenge.

National treasure Heather Havrilesky got at this right after the election when the national press was still jerking itself off about Hillbilly Elegy, about suburban discomfort and the need to conform:

In the suburbs the constant fear is “safety.” I recently sat at a suburban lunch table and listened to three women my own age talk for an hour about how to keep their purses safe during pre-school dropoff. Somebody knew somebody who’d heard something on the radio about men doing smash-and-grab with purses out of minivans and this was a federal case now. The preschool should have security cameras. Here’s my brand of car alarm.

(Just don’t leave your purse in your car, then. Don’t be an idiot. Why are we still talking about this?)

A group of moms at a playground recently devolved into talking about the lack of indoor playspaces nearby. I mentioned one, in a predominantly Hispanic suburb, which was bright and open and always had plenty of room for more kids. “That neighborhood is so sketchy,” one of the women told me. Had she been there? Of course not, her husband would never allow it! Everybody nodded; the world was dangerous and you had to protect yourself! It’s just awful about things these days. People are so goddamned scared.

Local TV news feeds this phenomenon, and the local suburban press as well. The city is always a cesspool of black and brown criminals, homeless, needy, looking to carjack you the minute you go downtown for a play. People always want to take what’s yours. If you’re from the city, you left because you HAD TO move away to protect yourself (and your children, the ready-made excuse for your racist crap) and that sense of being driven out by outside forces (black outside forces; unscrupulous real estate agents, not so much) informs everything around you now. You moved to be safe, but you don’t feel safe because now you’ve let fear control you and once is all it takes.

If you know anything about inherited trauma, you know what you tell your children about why you live where you live. People my age didn’t flee African-Americans marching for open housing but they damn well know why their parents and grandparents did, and among themselves, after a couple of beers, they’ll tell you they know how to keep everything under control.

From the Nation article:

Their material security bound up in the value of their real-estate assets, suburban white people had powerful incentives to keep their neighborhoods white. Just by their very proximity, black people would make their neighborhoods less desirable to future white home-buyers, thereby depreciating the value of the location. Location being the first rule of real estate, suburban homeowners nurtured racist attitudes, while deluding themselves that they weren’t excluding black people for reasons beyond their pocketbooks.

So the people who support Trump the hardest? The people who backed him with their donations and lawn signs and votes? They’re not trailer trash. They’re worse, and it’s because they think they’re better.

They think they’re better than trailer trash because they don’t use the n-word (as they stake a BLUE LIVES MATTER or a WE BACK THE BADGE sign into their lawns and ask why “minorities” have to make everything about race). They’d never tell a Hispanic woman to go back to “her” country if they saw her in the grocery store, but the next time they’re two glasses into the rosé at book club they’ll wonder if she was talking about them when she was speaking Spanish, and declare that immigrants don’t have to learn English anymore.

They’re not going to yell at a woman on the street to make them a sandwich. They will, however, tell a woman with a job that it’s too bad she can’t stay home with her kids, and say they’d never let “a stranger” take care of their children. They’ll put a bumper sticker on their cars: It’s a child, not a choice, or Defund Planned Parenthood, but they’re not bigots or sexists themselves.

They think their fear is more valid than the racism of some Confederate Flag-waving jackhole with a white truck and brown teeth. They think it’s more virtuous to be scared than to be evil. And if they ever do start to wonder if they might be monsters, if they might be on the wrong side of something, well, they have the trailer trash to look at and say, we’re not that. We have one ass instead of two, and nobody in our family’s in jail for making meth.

Dad worked in an office, not a coal mine. We’re better than them. We just vote for the same people, over and over, no matter what, and if we tell ourselves we have a different reason, maybe it buys us out of hell.

A.

Spouting off –

Hi all! Just flew back from the Yucatan, and boy are my arms tired!

A short “Obsession” follows, but first – what I did on my summer vacation :

Barbara and I went on a snorkeling trip, but only for the boat ride and not to go snorkeling (Inah reef is pretty much dead now). The trip goes from Puerto Adventuras, North around 10 miles along the coast.

The Piratas de Tejas is a 75-foot V-hull and not a catamaran, so it’s pretty susceptible to the wave action that is mostly nonstop in the channel between the Yucatan and Cozumel island, and it was a pretty rough ride. For some reason, the crew were playing Spanish language rap and techno (as if any of the 20-odd passengers were going to be dancing around instead of just hanging on) all the way out.

We stopped South of the reef, and the snorkelers were herded into a bait ball and led over to the reef. Barbara and I took advantage of the wind, stillness, and impossibly blue water to relax and chat with the other non-snorkelers, and have some ice-cold beers.

FullSizeRender

After the touristas were loaded back on and lunch served, we headed back.
That’s where it got a little strange.
At first, it was just blue skies and mile after mile of jungle as we made our way back South.
FullSizeRender (1)
Then I saw something interesting in the storm clouds that were forming up ahead. Something very interesting.
FullSizeRender (3)
Quoth I – “Look! A waterspout!”
 .
Everyone rushed over to where I was to take a look. One passenger looked down at the side of the ship – I guess he thought I meant water was spouting out of the boat.
They all gasped, and I proclaimed that since I was the first to see the developing water tornado were were heading directly for, I got to name it.
 .
I dubbed it : “Brussels”!
 .
FullSizeRender (2)
 .
Then two more formed, making three waterspouts now crisscrossing the Caribbean, dead ahead.
Yep – we’re still heading straight for them.
The Captain came down and told not to worry, then crossed himself twice and bit into his own clenched fist as he left us. Funny boy.
 .
Then the music (which had mercifully been changed to classic rock earlier) changed again.
 .
First – AC/DC’s “Thunderstruck”.
 .
Then CCR’s “Who’ll stop the rain?”
 .
Finally, “My heart will go on” from “Titanic”.
.
Like I said. Funny boy.
.
Some Freeper funnies at the handy link below..

Continue reading

Tagged , , , , , , ,

They Just Wanna Say Fuck You

Keep writing thinkpieces about the inner workings of Trump voters. This is what they’re all about: 

The Trump administration is discontinuing a signature girls education initiative championed by former first lady Michelle Obama, according to officials.

The “Let Girls Learn” program, which she and President Barack Obama started in 2015 to facilitate educational opportunities for adolescent girls in developing countries, will cease operation immediately, according to an internal document obtained by CNN.
While aspects of the initiative’s programming will continue, employees have been told to stop using the “Let Girls Learn” name and were told that, as a program unto itself, “Let Girls Learn” was ending.

Fuck the black First Lady and anything she liked. That’s all that matters to them, saying that. Trump is a human foam finger at a rally for the most hateful sports team in the world.

A.

Local Tool Can’t Handle Kids Asking Questions

It never ceases to amaze me that the GOP is the party of big swinging dicks, of Strong Defense Daddy, of Git ‘Er Done, because when a girl who weighs 90 pounds soaking wet asks her local rep to do something like hold a town hall meeting, that GOP rep freaks out like he’s just seen a sea monster: 

A group of University of Illinois students gathered in D.C. Tuesday to confront Congressman Rodney Davis.

The group visited Davis’ office voicing some of their concerns about higher education.

 The organizer recorded a Facebook live of the confrontation which had more than 8,000 views as of Wednesday.
Students asked Davis why he wouldn’t meet with them for a town hall meeting and in the video.

“I’m not surprised,” organizer, Anna Sekiguchi, said. “He was extremely dismissive and condescending and I think that speaks to how he views his constituents and specifically students.”

Davis then took to Facebook himself to post a longer video of him acting like a whiny asshole, along with more whining assholery:

Last night, you may have seen a story on FOX 55/27 Illinois about University of Illinois Urbana Champaign and University of Illinois Chicago students who came to my DC office for a photo Anna, Scheduling Director for the Illini Democrats, had requested. What the story didn’t mention was the students did get their photo and why the students were eventually asked to leave my office. Here is the entire Facebook Live video filmed by the students. I am happy to meet and speak with students but shouting and aggressive behavior is not productive.

“Aggressive behavior?” Again, the biggest person in that delegation is somebody I’m pretty sure this guy’s mom could take in a fight.

The full video, which he thinks exonerates him, shows him immediately getting turned off after realizing the woman speaking to him is a Democrat. He shows her card to the camera several times, saying “Democrats” in a “/redpill MGTOW commenter” voice, refuses to engage beyond that, and splits from the office like it’s on fire. He’s refusing to talk to his constituents, they went to him, he acted like a giant baby, they made chicken noises, and he fled.

Tell me again how we need Republicans in charge so that we can feel protected.

A.

Happy Boo Republicans Week

It’s spring break time for Congress. That means that Senators and Congresscritters are back home ostensibly interacting with their constituents. In 2017, that makes this boo Republicans week. The trend started when Trumpcare was under consideration has continued: rowdy town halls packed to the rafters with jeering constituents.

According to Tiger Beat On The Potomac, those Republicans not ducking town halls have made some adjustments:

Republicans across the country appeared much more comfortable and better prepared to deal with noisy town hall crowds. Yoho didn’t fire back when he was overwhelmed by angry constituents and protesters. Rather, he’d get down on one knee and gaze directly at his questioner, absorbing any heckling until he could finish his answer. Others defused tension with jokes, waiting out hecklers or pivoting to safe talking points.

“Let’s do some more!” Coffman said when the moderator called for one last question, at an event that had already gone 45 minutes late. It was a stark contrast from a few months ago, when Coffman escaped out the back door of a town hall event that had been overrun by protesters.

Part of that newfound confidence is due to increased vetting of town hall attendees.

Coffman’s constituents, for instance, had to register and show their IDs at the door to prove they were actually constituents. Policemen also stood by and watched from the top of the auditorium. In one instance, they even escorted out a woman who make a ruckus about Coffman’s views on climate change.

Raising a ruckus is as American as apple pie. Members of Congress work for us, not vice versa, and if they can’t take the heat they should stay out of the kitchen. I’ll apologize for that string of clichés with this musical interlude:

Here in the Gret Stet of Louisiana, freshman GOP Senator John Neely Kennedy continues to duck town halls. I’m not sure what he’s so afraid of: he’s been known to handle hecklers reasonably well in the past. It’s what happens when you’re a political chameleon like Neely. He may be afraid that 2004 liberal Neely will make an appearance instead of the 2017 Trumper model.

Some folks in New Orleans held an empty chair town hall the other day:

The questions fell like hail on the impassive white face of a cardboard cutout meant to represent Sen. John Neely Kennedy, who was not present for a “citizen’s town hall” hosted April 19 at First Unitarian Universalist Church by the New Orleans and Metairie chapters of progressive organization Indivisible.

At the event, which was meant to spotlight a perceived lack of responsiveness from the Louisiana freshman senator’s office, speakers took the mic to pose inquiries to the mock Kennedy, who rested opaquely in a cardboard “office” reminiscent of Lucy’s psychiatric clinic in the “Charlie Brown” comics.

You say cardboard cut-out, I say empty chair. Let’s call the whole thing off.

This event was a follow-up to the Milk Carton Kennedy protests in March. This image of the missing Solon was all over the internet back then:

Just remember, the next chance you get to boo a Republican member of Congress, go for it. And if you happen to see Joe Wilson, greet him with a hearty, “YOU LIE.”

One more thing. I am proud of those Democrats who pitched in to help Jon Ossoff in the recent primary election. That was once Newt Gingrich’s seat, so Ossoff’s first place finish was a moral victory. And he still has a chance to win the seat as long as he and his supporters will heed Curtis Mayfield’s admonition and keep on keeping on:

Vive les Maquis.

MOAB DICK

Call me Ishmael. Call me anything; just don’t call me late when supper’s ready.

Last week’s astonishing series of Trump administration* foreign policy u-turns and flip flops convinced some in the MSM that the long-awaited PIVOT had come. The Insult Comedian actually got some positive press as the media drooled over the “beautiful” missiles that struck Syria. Lyin’ Brian actually out malaproped Gum Spice on that one. Instead of gushing over Trumpian manliness, the MSM should be worried about the erratic course this incompetent and incoherent administration* is steering. 

While many in the MSM became tumescent over Donald’s dick waving, those of us who do satire searched (groped?) for the right analogy. As you can see above, Dr. Strangelove references are popular with the madcap zanies at Wonkette. They got there first so that’s Slim Pickens for me. That’s when a military acronym exploded in my head: MOAB.

MOAB is, of course, military speak for the mother of all bombs. They’ve been around for a while but neither Bush nor Obama wanted to drop the very big one. The Donald is made of stupider stuff: how could he resist dropping the biggest non-nuclear bomb in history? It’s like being Dirk Diggler for a day. y’all. It *almost* made us forget his teeny, tiny hands. Almost.

MOAB was tailor-made for Trump. He’s just another boomer chicken hawk whose manhood is linked in his own mind with weaponry. Bombs are glimmering phalluses hence MOAB Dick. I have the feeling that the Insult Comedian never finished Moby Dick, so he might want to pick up one of these nifty comix. Cliff’s Notes are so un-presidential.

It’s from 1942, so it’s older and rarer than Trump-hab. His white whale was the White House, which has become such an Albatross that he spends every weekend at Mar-A-Lugee. We’re also treated to endless stories of the struggle between Bannon and young Jared as they vie to be Ishmael to Trump’s Ahab. The Melville character was the sole survivor of the Pequod and narrated Moby Dick. My money is on Jared. He married the boss’ daughter and gave the president* grandchirren. All Bannon gave him was the White House. Jared is blood. Blood trumps everything in Trump World: “Call me Jared. I survived.” He *is* a two-legged cockroach, after all.

Back to the dangerous situation caused by Trump’s face off with pipsqueak North Korean dictator Kim Jong-un. They’re actually peas in a very crazy pod. Both will do *anything* for attention, which is why the Obama administration’s policy of’ “strategic patience” was a wise one. When a toddler pitches a tantrum at the dinner table, one can either ignore them or go the time-out route. Never give them what they want: attention and approval. That’s what the world needs to do with both of these baby men: put them in time-out.

Our Asian allies are noticeably unenthusiastic about toddler tantrum as policy:

Those in the US&A who would like a manly “preemptive strike” on North Korea forget the fact that it’s the Republic of Korea that will suffer the consequences. It’s a friendly nation, and has become a democracy during my lifetime. South Korea is going through a painful political scandal and has no appetite for Trumper dick waving. I wonder if he even knows about the impeachment and indictment of former President Park Guen-hye

The Darnold is a profoundly, indeed militantly, ignorant man. He was convinced until recently that China could order North Korea to knock it off.  Wrong.The Kim family dynasty have long been China’s crazy communist cousin. The PRC has influence but Kim Jong-un and his generals run the show in Pyongyang. I’m waiting for another overgrown toddler, Dennis Rodman, to revive wormplomacy and offer to serve as an intermediary.  The Insult Comedian might take him up on it: Rodman appeared on Celebrity Apprentice twice. I hear the ratings were better than on Arnold’s watch. Believe me.

Another thing strikes me about Trump’s new role as MOAB Dick to the world. He’s facing off with two family dynasties in Syria and North Korea. Perhaps that’s why he thinks he can solve these problems: he learned about dynastic power at Fred Trump’s dinner table. The Assads and the Kims, however, put the nasty in dynasty. They’re not going anywhere even though we all wish they would. It’s much harder than dealing with other developers, gangsters, Ed Koch, and Gary Busey. Believe me.

Team Trump’s effort in wagging the dog and distracting attention from their scandals has been surprisingly effective. It’s the only thing they’ve gotten right thus far, but the act isn’t going over very well in Seoul and Tokyo. It’s time for them to put the MOAB Dick back in their pants and zip it about North Korea. Twitplomacy won’t work any better than wormplomacy despite Rodman’s tremendous tattoos. Believe me.

I didn’t plan to write such a long post. I guess the Melville geist has taken hold. It’s time to meet Bartleby the Scrivener for coffee. I hope he doesn’t consider me the Melvillain of the piece…

Today on Tommy T’s Obsession with the Freeperati – from bad to obverse edition

So – The Darnold decided to bomb the fuck out of Syria to distract everyone from the rolling clusterfuck that is his administration  avenge the dead babies.  What could have turned him from a “Crooked Hillary wants to get us in wars” isolationist/fuck NATO kinda guy into George Patton II? Advice from his Generals? Advice from his (heh) National Insecurity Council? His astrologer?

Funny you should ask.

Eric Trump: Ivanka Convinced President Trump to Strike Syria

Eric Trump: Ivanka Convinced President Trump to Strike Syria
pjmedia.com/thedailytelegraph ^ | 4/11/17 | Tyler O’Neil

Posted on ‎4‎/‎11‎/‎2017‎ ‎4‎:‎19‎:‎04‎ ‎PM by ColdOne

President Donald Trump’s 33-year-old son Eric told Britain’s The Daily Telegraph that his sister Ivanka, rather than her husband Jared Kushner, convinced the U.S. head of state to launch 59 Tomahawk missiles in retaliation for a sarin gas attack last week.

“Ivanka is a mother of three kids and she has influence. I’m sure she said ‘listen, this is horrible stuff.’ My father will act in times like that,” Eric Trump told The Telegraph in an interview at the Trump Turnberry golf resort in Ayrshire, Scotland.

“He also confirmed that President Trump’s decision to bomb a Syrian airbase … was influenced by the reaction of his sister Ivanka, who said she was ‘heartbroken and outraged’ by the atrocity,” the British paper reported.

1 posted on 4‎/‎11‎/‎2017‎ ‎4‎:‎19‎:‎04‎ ‎PM by ColdOne
Reactions?
To: ColdOne

 

She is the mother of 3 kids so bombs away.

2 posted on 4‎/‎11‎/‎2017‎ ‎4‎:‎20‎:‎46‎ ‎PM by BRL

To be fair, all moms have probably considered calling in an air strike on their kiddos at some point.
To: ColdOne

 

I hope she doesn’t ask him to give 3,504 weeks of maternity leave because single pregnant mothers break her heart 🙂

3 posted on 4‎/‎11‎/‎2017‎ ‎4‎:‎20‎:‎59‎ ‎PM by dp0622 (The only thing an upper crust cIonservative hates more than a liberal is a middle class conservative)

Can’t understand what’s keeping the “blood coming out of her whatever” remarks…
To: BRL

 

What’s going to happen when a world event coincides with her being in PMS

4 posted on 4‎/‎11‎/‎2017‎ ‎4‎:‎22‎:‎01‎ ‎PM by BRL

Right on schedule – and the third post after the OP, too.
To: BRL
What’s going to happen when a world event coincides with her being in PMS 

The Navy will launch 59 frying pans instead of cruise missiles?

10 posted on 4‎/‎11‎/‎2017‎ ‎4‎:‎26‎:‎39‎ ‎PM by 50mm
youguys
To: jimjohn

 

THis is pretty pathetic imo

13 posted on 4‎/‎11‎/‎2017‎ ‎4‎:‎28‎:‎02‎ ‎PM by ground_fog ( My God this was from today!)

To: Rebel2016
Ivanka, go back to NYC, leave military business to your dad. 

Agreed….and…..take your husband with you.

11 posted on 4‎/‎11‎/‎2017‎ ‎4‎:‎27‎:‎35‎ ‎PM by rockabyebaby (The next four years will be YUGE!)
To: ColdOne

 

Eric, just shut up. White House staffers do not disclose internal deliberations. You people need to climb the learning curve in a hurry.

17 posted on 4‎/‎11‎/‎2017‎ ‎4‎:‎30‎:‎19‎ ‎PM by colorado tanker

ThatShipHasSailed
To: ColdOne

 

Upset Ivanka and I’ll bomb you.
Trump’s new foreign policy?

22 posted on 4‎/‎11‎/‎2017‎ ‎4‎:‎36‎:‎55‎ ‎PM by VitacoreVision

Fortunately for humanity, she hasn’t toured either Korea yet.
It is a little strange that in a thread with so much Trump daughter hate, there’s not one iota of hate for the person who TOOK Ivanka’s PMS-laden advice.
Not one particle.
And now, the post of the thread!
To: ColdOne

 

I’m giving her a pass because of how good looking she is. If she was ugly, I’d be calling her Amy Carter by now.

25 posted on ‎4‎/‎11‎/‎2017‎ ‎4‎:‎38‎:‎42‎ ‎PM by Opinionated Blowhard (“When the people find they can vote themselves money, that will herald the end of the republic.”)

Hold the rimshots!
Could last week have gotten any worse for the Freeperati? Read more and find out!

Continue reading

Tagged , , , , , , ,

Sean Spicer’s Odyssey From Gum Spice To Malaprop Spice

I planned to call this post Gum Spice Is Gassed. No, not the kind of gas they used at the Holocaust Centers. I was referring to the fact that dignity wraith Sean Spicer appears to be used up and spit out like the Orbit gum he crams in his gob. He’s gassed. He’s done.

Gum Spice’s meltdown Tuesday was the worst since Presidents have had press secretaries dating back to 1929. He made Ron Ziegler look like JFK’s crack spokesdude, Pierre Salinger. You’ve all heard Spicer’s inanely incoherent contortions on Assad, Hitler, and chemical weapons. Subsequent explanations have only made matters worse.

The only way Spicer survives in his job is if Trump gets stubborn over the calls for his spokesman’s pinhead. The Insult Comedian likes to do his own firing, thank you yery much, or as he would say very, very, very, very, very, very much. I do wish he would vary his verys…

If you get a chance to see Rachel Maddow’s Tuesday segment on the Spicer incident, it’s must see teevee. It turns out that Gum Spice has a hard time speaking the language, which is odd given his chosen profession: political flack. He fucks up names: he keeps calling the Australian Prime Minister Malcolm Trumbull. His name is Turnbull. T-U-R-N-B-U-L-L. I wonder if there are any flash cards left over at the White House from the Reagan years: they helped Ronnie, why not Seannie? Spicer also has an eerie inability to pronounce the name of the dictator he’s denouncing: Bashar al-Assad.

Since Spicer cannot pronounce, he should renounce his title as Press Secretary. End of Jesse Jackson/Johnnie Cochran moment. Public speaking *is* hard but that’s what he does for a living. Spicer needs a new First Draft nickname as well. I’ve been calling him Gum Spice in honor of his gum habit and my post about it, Sean Spicer Can Lie and Chew Gum at the Same Time. It turns out that I got the lying part right, but when it comes to speaking he’s hopeless. That’s why I am giving him an alternate First Draft nickname, Malaprop Spice. It may be the reason he gets shitcanned: the Insult Comedian is in charge of malaprops in this administration*, thank you very, very, very much.

Every time I think Team Trump cannot be more incompetent, they top themselves. That’s what happens when an entire administration* wings it. I may not be a prophet (with or without honor) but I wrote a piece about Trump in December, 2015 entitled Winging It With The Insult Comedian:

Trump’s tendency to spout off and utter unfiltered bullshit is the most alarming thing about his candidacy, not his ideology. The Insult Comedian has no ideology: the only thing he believes in is himself and the roar of the crowd. The last thing a country with the world’s largest military needs is a guy who wings it as the Oval One. Impulse control is a very important quality for any President to have. The Insult Comedian has none, he’s like the kid who eats all his Halloween candy in one sitting and wonders why he’s puking his guts out.

I stand by my prediction in that post that this would blow up in Trump’s face. I certainly was off in my timing but it’s happening as I write. Between lies and incompetence, the Trump administration* has no credibility left. The Guardian’s Spencer Ackerman argues that Trump has had five Syria policies and counting in the last two weeks. He’s absolutely right. It’s what happens when you’re winging it with the Insult Comedian.

Back to Malaprop Spice, the artist formerly known as Gum Spice. I almost feel sorry for him right now. Almost. He’s a beaten man. He’s licked…all over.

Rumor has it that the Trumpers want to hire Reagan’s White House spokesman, Larry Speakes, to replace the man who has gummed up the works. Speakes had the best name ever for someone in his position. He was never formally White House press secretary because Jim Brady continued to hold that title after being shot. Besides, it was more fun to call him White House spokesman, Larry Speakes.

The problem is that spokesman Speakes died in 2014. Perhaps Bannon, Jared, Ivanka, Kellyanne, and Reince can have a seance and bring back spokesman Speakes. I have spoken.

Repeat after me: if you cannot pronounce, you must renounce.

Today on Tommy T’s Obsession with the Freeperati – Bannon Hammer edition

First they were all like :

Bannon Out of NSC? McMaster Prepares To Reorganize Foreign Policy Team
Zero Hedge ^ | Feb 23, 2017 | “Tyler Durden”

Posted on 2/25/2017, 1:13:55 PM by GoldenState_Rose

“…veterans of past administrations and members of Congress from both parties criticized the decision to put Mr. Bannon on the principals committee, saying that it risked injecting politics into national security. President George W. Bush’s senior adviser, Karl Rove, was generally kept out of sensitive national security meetings. Mr. Obama’s senior adviser, David Axelrod, attended some national security meetings but was not given formal status.”

“As for Bannon, who may be cut from the NSC, Trump’s decision will be carefully watched as such a move would be potentially perceived as a relaxation of Bannon’s influence over Trump, a topic which has been of material focus for the press in recent weeks.”

*******************************

Steve Bannon is the most important figure in our President’s inner circle. Truly one of our own.
1 posted on 2/25/2017, 1:13:55 PM by GoldenState_Rose
I couldn’t agree more.
Initial reactions were pretty predictable :
To: GoldenState_Rose

More F-ing fake news from Zero Hedge.

2 posted on 2/25/2017, 1:15:53 PM by catnipman ( Cat Nipman: Vote Republican in 2012 and only be called racist one more time!)

To: GoldenState_Rose

More junk/fake news from the Ny Slimes being reborn as new junk/fake news:

(snip)

Zero News, takes warmed over Ny Slimes Fake news and makes it into Junk/Fake News.

7 posted on 2/25/2017, 1:19:53 PM by Grampa Dave (No country has a right to ship their poverty laden, killers, rapists & criminals to our/my country!!)
To: GoldenState_Rose

More fake news. Not one single comment from McMaster on Bannon.

35 posted on 2/25/2017, 2:15:23 PM by LS (“Castles Made of Sand, Fall in the Sea . . . Eventually” (Hendrix))

Groupthink doubleplus ungood.
And then – the Bannon Hammer comes down!

Bannon Removed From National Security Council Role in Shakeup [Link Only] Bloomberg [Link in Body] ^ | April 5, 2017 | Jennifer Jacobs Posted on 4/5/2017, 10:43:16 AM by C19fan

1 posted on 4/5/2017, 10:43:16 AM by C19fan
790dc-exploding_head
To: C19fan

Looks like Ivanka and Jarred are taking over.

2 posted on 4/5/2017, 10:45:38 AM by tennmountainman (“Prophet Mountainman” Predicter Of All Things RINO…for a small pittance)

To: C19fan

What does this mean? Did Mz Rice and the NSA have anything to do with this?

tinfoil full

Does Syria? Who did Bannon PO?

3 posted on 4/5/2017, 10:46:59 AM by BarbM (President Trump. (no tag line needed))

 More pissing and moaning after the thingy… Continue reading
Tagged , , , , , , , ,

Today on Tommy T’s Obsession with the Freeperati – in like Flynn edition II

Uh oh.

Ex-Trump adviser Flynn offers testimony if he gets immunity
Market Watch ^ | March 30, 2017 | Shane Harris

Posted on 3/30/2017, 5:46:07 PM by Coronal

WASHINGTON — Mike Flynn, President Donald Trump’s former national security adviser, has told the Federal Bureau of Investigation and congressional officials investigating the Trump campaign’s potential ties to Russia that he is willing to be interviewed in exchange for a grant of immunity from prosecution, according to officials with knowledge of the matter.

As an adviser to Trump’s presidential campaign, and later one of Trump’s top aides in the White House, Flynn was privy to some of the most sensitive foreign-policy deliberations of the new administration and was directly involved in discussions about the possible lifting of sanctions on Russia imposed by the Obama administration.

He has made the offer to the FBI and the House and Senate intelligence committees though his lawyer but has so far found no takers, the officials said. Flynn’s attorney, Robert Kelner, declined to comment.

1 posted on 3/30/2017, 5:46:07 PM by Coronal

Okee dokee – how are the Freepers dealing with the whole “Flynn’s going to testify if he’s given immunity” thingy?

To: Coronal

 

Has he been threatened ?

2 posted on 3/30/2017, 5:48:51 PM by WashingtonFire (President Trump – it’s like having your dad as President !)

CornholioThreateningMe
To: Coronal

 

Maybe he’ll suffer an industrial accident.

3 posted on 3/30/2017, 5:50:31 PM by Brad from Tennessee (A politician can’t give you anything he hasn’t first stolen from you.)

The Russians are faking industrial accidents now? I thought shooting and polonium poisoning was more their style.
To: Coronal

 

I’m thinking fake news.

8 posted on 3/30/2017, 5:55:00 PM by BlueCat
STFU
To: BlueCat

 

They just broke story on FBN. Don’t think it’s fake,

10 posted on 3/30/2017, 5:57:08 PM by jersey117

To: Coronal

 

Grant him immunity, he might roll over on Obama.

13 posted on 3/30/2017, 5:58:33 PM by Timpanagos1

OK – now that’s funny.
To: SE Mom

 

National security reporter was signaling this about flynn last weekend. Most here just claimed it was fake news

30 posted on 3/30/2017, 6:08:08 PM by RummyChick

BanHimKitteh
.
Wait a minute! Maybe it IS fake news??
.
To: BlueCat

 

Lou Dobbs just had an alert that Flynn has NOT offered to testify for immunity. You were right. Fake news.

56 posted on 3/30/2017, 6:30:02 PM by jersey117

Lou Dobbs? How could anyone doubt him!
To: RummyChick

 

Flynn lawyer released statement. He is looking for protection

68 posted on 3/30/2017, 6:54:06 PM by RummyChick

Spoilsport.
.
More after the jump.  If you didn’t know that Flynn’s getting Russian rubles wasn’t Hillary’s fault, it’ll be a revelation!
.

Continue reading

Tagged , , , , , , , , ,

Bonus Sunday “Obsession” – Freedumb Caucus edition

Sorry to spring this on you folks this quiet Sunday morning, but just – damn.

(composite thread)

Donald Trump declares war on Freedom Caucus
Twitter ^ | March 30, 2017 | Donald Trump

Posted on 3/30/2017, 8:57:15 AM by Tea Party Terrorist

“The Freedom Caucus will hurt the entire Republican agenda if they don’t get on the team, & fast. We must fight them, & Dems, in 2018!” – Donald Trump

1 posted on 3/30/2017, 8:57:15 AM by Tea Party Terrorist
Well.
This should be interesting.
To: Tea Party Terrorist

 

He is getting very bad advice. Does he think conservatives voted for him so he could cave to the RINOs who did not? He is killing his chances to hold the House next year.

3 posted on 3/30/2017, 8:59:13 AM by txrefugee

It’s not advice.
It’s him. It’s the way he is, and the way he’s always been.
They made him look foolish, so they must pay.
To: Tea Party Terrorist

 

Super-sized mistake , if an accurate report. IMO, unimaginable.

5 posted on 3/30/2017, 9:00:01 AM by faithhopecharity (“Politicans are not born, they’re excreted.” — Marcus Tillius Cicero)

.
To: faithhopecharity

 

If an accurate report??????????

It’s a tweet. Word for frickin word.

11 posted on 3/30/2017, 9:02:16 AM by KyCats

.
To: faithhopecharity

 

He tweeted it this morning. I almost fell over. This is nuts.

10 posted on 3/30/2017, 9:01:56 AM by Excellence (Marine mom since April 11, 2014)

To: Tea Party Terrorist

 

News Flash: Trump is a populist, not a conservative.

26 posted on 3/30/2017, 9:05:41 AM by rayvd

Actually, according to his poll numbers, he’s a un-populist.
I think this next one is my favourite :
To: momincombatboots

 

Trump is just being true to his real nature – a self-centered big-mouthed New York leftist. The angst around here as Trump continues to reveal himself for what he really is will be something to behold.

9 posted on 3/30/2017, 10:45:04 AM by liberty_lvr (My personal likes and dislikes are totally irrelevant to the salvation of this nation.)

I seem to be detecting some buyer’s remorse here…or maybe just angst in their pants.
To: davikkm

 

Trump really screwed up with this one. The Guys in the Freedom Caucus are in very “Safe” Districts. His threat is only going to be greeted with laughs. I am a trump supporter, but sometimes I wish he would run his proposed Tweets by some of his staff before he cranks them out. Ronald Reagan had an eleventh Commandment about not talking ill of fellow Republicans. Trump would do well to remember that.

18 posted on 3/30/2017, 10:51:25 AM by Old Retired Army Guy (frequently.)

To: faithhopecharity

The Freedom Caucus will hurt the entire Republican agenda if they don’t get on the team, & fast. We must fight them, & Dems, in 2018!
@realDonaldTrump – 9:07 AM – 30 Mar 2017

It’s real alright.

Unwise, to be polite about it. “Real stupid” to be more blunt, and to be frank about it, he’s starting to piss me off.

53 posted on 3/30/2017, 9:11:12 AM by Cboldt
More Et Tu, Brute? below the fold…

Continue reading

Tagged , , , , , , , , ,