Saturday Odds & Sods: Tombstone Shadow

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Henry Fonda as Wyatt Earp.

It’s been a tough week in the Gret Stet of Louisiana. The July heat has metastasized into even more gun violence than usual here in New Orleans, and more spectacularly in Lafayette. The notion of a movie theatre shooting is unnerving for someone like me who has spent vast chunks of my life in the dark watching flickering images on the big screen.  We’ve learned that the shooter is not just another demented loner but a Confederate flag flying wingnut. Nice.

Another sad fact is that it is easier to get a gun in Louisiana than it is to vote. Any attempt to limit our egregiously stupid open carry law is doomed to fail no matter who is elected Governor in the fall. Anyone surprised? I thought not.

Speaking of Governors, PBJ was in the state for the first time in a month and skedaddled to Lafayette to take part in a “looking concerned” photo-op and press conference. He had nothing of substance to offer. Bob Mann said it best when he wrote that all Jindal had to offer were “hugs and shrugs.” In other PBJ news, his staff were able to convince gullible reporters at Politico and the Advocate that an INTERNAL POLL showing PBJ at 8% in Iowa is a surge. 8 fucking percent? Give me a break.

How was that for a cheery opening note for this week’s Saturday post? Don’t worry, the usual contingent of jokes and puns will be forthcoming. On to this week’s theme song, John Fogerty’s Tombstone Shadow. There *is* a connection between it and the iconic image of Henry Fonda in John Ford’s My Darling Clementine but we’ll get to that after the break. But first let’s rock with the original CCR studio version followed by a 2005 live version from John and his crack band. I opted out of the Creedence Clearwater Revisited rendition because it has all the vices of the original (the same mediocre rhythm section) and none of its virtues.

We’ll get oddsier and sodsier after the break if such a thing is possible.

Continue reading “Saturday Odds & Sods: Tombstone Shadow”

Wingnut Mailbag: Bad Timing Edition

 Remember Rob Maness aka Col. Mayonnaise? He ran in the 2014 Louisiana Senate primary as a Tea Party candidate. He’s gone on to form something called GatorPac. I guess he’s not much of a sports fan or he’d know that Gators are Tiger Bait in the Gret Stet of Louisiana.

Anyway, he proves yet again why his name rhymes with anus. A fundraising email landed in my in-box earlier this afternoon. Col. Mayonnaise is raffling off a rifle. The  funds will go to protect good Mericans from gun grabbing libruls. The rub is that it arrived on the day the country is reeling from the Charleston church massacre. Way to go, GatorPac.

You can see the email after the break.

Continue reading “Wingnut Mailbag: Bad Timing Edition”

A Nation Under The Law

– owners of people. Stalin’s purges were under the rule of law. Jim Crow was under the rule of law. Nuremburg was under the rule of law. — Hubbit (@hubbit) November 25, 2014 Obama last night:  First and foremost, we are a nation built on the rule of law.  And so we need to accept that this decision was the grand jury’s to make. There are Americans who agree with it, and there are Americans who are deeply disappointed, even angry.  It’s an understandable reaction.  But I join Michael’s parents in asking anyone who protests this decision to do so … Continue reading A Nation Under The Law

Fall/Winter Do-Something Project: Help a School District Attacked by the NRA

Among the many fake wingnut freakouts this week was a full-on Internet pigfuck designed to rile up the web’s most rabid and sic them on a small Wisconsin school district. The Eau Claire Area School District hosts a veterans’ program every year that invites the local kiddos to learn about our history and honor the vets. It’s the usual nicey-nice community thing, only this year the school district said look, we live in media culture of 24-7 school shooting coverage. The sound of gunshots wigs kids and their parents out. Couldja maybe not do the rifle salute you do every year?  “We like … Continue reading Fall/Winter Do-Something Project: Help a School District Attacked by the NRA

Red Stick Creepfest

That’s my name for it, they called it the Republican Unity Rally. It was held in support of the Cassidybot Senate campaign and among the speakers were Bitter Vitter, Colonel Mayonnaise, Gov PBJ, and an outside agitator, Senator Aqua Buddha. Here are a few tweets featuring this rogue’s gallery of malakatude: Red Stick Creep Fest: pic.twitter.com/38IuMUjN3q — Shecky (@Adrastosno) November 11, 2014 Sen. Aqua Buddha wearing a table cloth. pic.twitter.com/8mt9UKftpb — Shecky (@Adrastosno) November 11, 2014 @ekeog I think it was a day time rally so Gov Bat Boy was in his coffin. — Shecky (@Adrastosno) November 11, 2014 It’s a … Continue reading Red Stick Creepfest

Today In Responsible Gun Ownership: Jose Canseco Edition

Former American League MVP Jose Canseco is a legendary meathead. From turning his team mates on to steroids, to damaging his career by pitching in a game to satisfy his huge ego, to various brushes with the law, Jose has an established track record of severe malakatude. The latest Jose sighting involves that whole Second Amendment thing: Former baseball star Jose Canseco nearly lost a finger after accidentally shooting himself in the hand Tuesday. Las Vegas Metro police Lt. Mark Reddon told the Associated Press that officers responded to a call of an accidental shooting at Canseco’s home just after 5:30 p.m. ET. … Continue reading Today In Responsible Gun Ownership: Jose Canseco Edition

Tweet Of The Day: Gun Totin’ PBJ Edition

Bobby Jindal may be one of the most unpopular Governors in the country but he knows how to pander to the gun nutterazi: https://twitter.com/Gun_Shots/status/525159387078602752 Little “Bobby” looks ridiculous in that picture but not as ridiculous as the caption. And that monogrammed windbreaker is from hunger. In the end, his campaign will only amount to a Magical Misery Tour: Since the Krewe of Spank met last night, I could not resist the Krewe du Vieux reference. It was the mother krewe’s theme in 2008. I suggested Spank do a political freak show theme this year with PBJ and Bitter Vitter as conjoined twins but the group … Continue reading Tweet Of The Day: Gun Totin’ PBJ Edition

Today In Responsible Gun Ownership: Institutional Edition

Anyone surprised that open carry mania trumps a serious death threat? I actually was. I should have known better:  A feminist speaker has canceled a speech at Utah State University after learning the school would allow concealed firearms despite an anonymous threat against her. Anita Sarkeesian was scheduled to give a presentation on the portrayal of women in video games on Wednesday evening. She made the decision to cancel Tuesday night. University staff members had received a threat earlier Tuesday from an unknown person who vowed to carry out a mass shooting if the event was held. University spokesman Tim … Continue reading Today In Responsible Gun Ownership: Institutional Edition

Today In Responsible Gun Ownership: Oregon Edition

Just in case y’all were under the mistaken impression that open carry doofi (doofuses?) were restricted to red states: An Oregon man openly carrying his brand new handgun was robbed of the firearm Saturday by another armed man. Portland TV station KPTV reported that the 21-year-old victim, who had bought a semi-automatic .22-caliber handgun earlier in the day, was openly carrying the weapon down a street in Gresham, Ore. while talking to his cousin. The two men told investigators that another man approached them on their walk and asked for a cigarette. Police said the group’s conversation eventually turned to … Continue reading Today In Responsible Gun Ownership: Oregon Edition

Today In Responsible Gun Ownership: Restaurant Edition

I’ve picked on gun nuttery in other states, it’s the Gret Stet of Louisiana’s turn: Walk into many stores, restaurant or workplaces nowadays, and you see the signs reading “No weapons allowed.” But a popular local restaurant is bucking that trend by not only encouraging people to show off their guns, but offering a discount to those who do. It’s the Friday lunch crowd at Bergeron’s with fried catfish, the top seller. Owner Kevin Cox says 500 people come through the Port Allen restaurant daily. So about two weeks ago, he started a new promotion to help some of his customers … Continue reading Today In Responsible Gun Ownership: Restaurant Edition

Today In Responsible Gun Ownership

Another moron with a gun did something stupid. Because 2nd Amendment: A 5-year-old’s birthday party took a grisly turn on Saturday after her family’s dog escaped from the yard and was shot by an armed pedestrian. Emily Martinez recalls hearing a gunshot after her dog Clifford jumped a fence during her daughter’s party, The Denver Post reported. The family poured into the street and found a stranger, apparently walking his own dog, standing over the family pet, still brandishing a gun. According to neighbors and guests at the party, the man who shot the dog was shouting that he was within … Continue reading Today In Responsible Gun Ownership

Waiting for the End of the World

In my day, people with root cellars filled with guns, butter and likker or backyard bomb shelters were called survivalists. They’re now called “preppers,” which is a term that I’d never heard of until today. It turns out that Nancy Lanza, the mother of the mass murdering Newtown monster, was a prepper. Nancy Lanza, whose gun collection was raided by her son Adam for Friday’s massacre at Sandy Hook school, was part of the “prepper” movement, which urges readiness for social chaos by hoarding supplies and training with weapons. “She prepared for the worst,” her sister-in-law Marsha Lanza told reporters. … Continue reading Waiting for the End of the World