Category: Jude

Economy, Jude10 Comments

Got Your Pitchforks And Torches Ready?

Really, at this point, is there anything else that will get the message across? I don’t know if you’ve heard, but Associated Bank here in Wisconsin has been making headlines lately. And not in a good way. It seems that Associated Bank went to the government and got some of that sweet, sweet TARP smack. Somewhere around $525 million. Yeah. Half a billion dollars of our money went to this bank. And what did they decide to do? Throw a party, of course! Actually, the trip in question had been planned for some time. It was a getaway for 100 … Continue reading Got Your Pitchforks And Torches Ready?

Jude, Of Interest6 Comments

Now That Blogs Have Killed Journalism, They’ve Turned On Themselves

Hey, Rocky, watch me pull a new media outta my hat! I’m surprised Athenae didn’t mention this; I suppose she’s been too busy lining newspapers up against the wall and shooting them. But it is mysad gleeful duty to announcethe demise of Pajamas Media. Yes, apparently, offering shitty right-wing commentary on the events of the day and sending ignorant-ass Ohio contractors to play at being war correspondents is not a viable business model. (I know the TV part hasn’t died yet–but don’t fret. Instead, prepare the popcorn) Guys and gals of Pajamas Media: The right-wing is not profitable. You dumbasses. … Continue reading Now That Blogs Have Killed Journalism, They’ve Turned On Themselves

Jude7 Comments

Snakes On A Planet

Because it’s just not the same without a visual. Here’s the giant snake mentioned yesterday. I’m so glad I wasn’t born any sooner than I was. Naturally, there weren’t any people at all–or even apes, for that matter–58 to 60 million years ago. So, after the dinosaurs but before the mammals, it appears there was an Age of Giant Snakes. And now you know a little more about the Cheney family tree. Go in peace. Continue reading Snakes On A Planet

Jude

Before You Get Your Super Bowl On, Get Your Super Roll On

Get your roll on, Chop. So, Madison, you’re gonna watch the Super Bowl on Sunday. But what to do beforehand? And where to watch the game? Don’t worry, Mad-town.I got your back. Warm up for the Sunday action by watching some ass-kicking live! Come on down to the Veterans Memorial Coliseum at the Alliant Energy Center to watch the bad-ass women of the Mad Rollin’ Dolls skate their hearts out. And beat each other up. Hard hitting, but with fewer pads. And, if I may opine, better uniforms. Doors open at noon, the first bout starts at one. So you … Continue reading Before You Get Your Super Bowl On, Get Your Super Roll On

Current Affairs, Jude11 Comments

I Hope They’ve Learned Something

Really, I hope Obama and his team have learned something from the ongoing stimulus bill drama. We all know what happened, right? The House Dems put together a stimulus bill to which, surprise, the Republicans objected. What did they object to? Family planning. Because, you know, helping people avoid pregnancies during tough times clearly can’t do anything to help ease economic pain for individuals. Oh, no. So the President, naively, urged the House Dems to drop the family planning proposal from the bill. And they did. Republicans cooed approvingly, happy that the new President was reaching out to them in … Continue reading I Hope They’ve Learned Something

Economy, Jude10 Comments

These Motherfuckers Are Beyond Shame. Or Redemption.

Time to throw a few rich pricks in one of these again. It takes a very special kind of person to bethis much of a prick: Three days after receiving $25 billion in federal bailout funds, Bank of America Corp. hosted a conference call with conservative activists and business officials to organize opposition to the U.S. labor community’s top legislative priority. Participants on the October 17 call — including at least one representative from another bailout recipient, AIG — were urged to persuade their clients to send “large contributions” to groups working against the Employee Free Choice Act (EFCA), as … Continue reading These Motherfuckers Are Beyond Shame. Or Redemption.

Immoral Values, Jude12 Comments

More “Pro-Life” Bullshit

Behold Lucifer himself. This is why the “conscience clause” is transparent, anti-woman bullshit. A clinic nurse first removed her intrauterine birth-control device without permission, says the patient in a federal action, then told her that “having the IUD come out was a good thing,” because “I personally do not like IUDs. I feel they are a type of abortion. I don’t know how you feel about abortion, but I am against them.” The patient sued Presbyterian Health Services Rio Rancho Family Health Center and nurse practitioner Sylvia Olona in Federal Court. The plaintiff says she went to Rio Rancho to … Continue reading More “Pro-Life” Bullshit

Diary, Jude

I Have A Problem

That’s what I just said. I know what you’re thinking. Just one? And you’re probably right. However, last night, I had a long, involved dream. It’s unusual for me to remember anything about my dreams, but this one stuck. I dreamed it was election day. In 2012. And I was reassuring nervous friends that Obama was going to be just fine, even though I was feeling a little trepidation myself. So, yeah. My life has become likeThe West Wing, but without the glory, fame, power, or money. Happy Inauguration Day, everyone! Continue reading I Have A Problem

Jude, Stupid Republican Tricks2 Comments

Ben Shapiro Is An Asshole

Ben Shapiro, undated file photo. I know this really isn’t news, but Ben Shapiro is an asshole. What’s he done lately? Good question. Bear with me. After extolling the benefits of virginity (and remember–some choose abstinence, while others have abstinence thrust upon them), writing some shitty books, losing his job as a lawyer, and hitting the wingnut welfare circuit, Ben Shapiro, aka the Virgin Ben, has decided to try his hand at–wait for it–entertainment criticism! That’s right. I love shit like this. A 24-year-old with no life experience or knowledge of art as an entertainment critic? It gives me so … Continue reading Ben Shapiro Is An Asshole

Jude, Stupid Republican Tricks7 Comments

Hey, Jagoff

Oh no! The Red State Strike Force! I’m quaking in my boots, someone get me some clean underwear, whatever will we–oh, I just can’t keep this up. Some people make it their goal to place themselves beyond parody. If you know anyone like this, point that person to Erick Erickson at Red State–he will show that person the way. I swear to god, I am not making this up. blockquote> If you are interested in being a part of the Army of Redstate Activists in your state, please fill out the form below. We’ll post this on a regular basis. … Continue reading Hey, Jagoff

Jude, Of Interest3 Comments

Jara Sang His Song–A Weapon, in the Hands of Love

Victor Jara, 1932-1973 Go read Bob Harris. Do it. And do it every day. The man has a way with words. I actually learned about Victor Jara from a U2 song (“One Tree Hill,” quoted in the title to this post). And I’m glad I bothered to look him up. Hooray forThe Joshua Tree! Seriously, though. Check outBob Harris’ site. And maybe buy one of his books? You’ll be glad you did. Continue reading Jara Sang His Song–A Weapon, in the Hands of Love

Jude, Of Interest4 Comments

Next Thing You Know, We’ll Be Singing “The Internationale” On Our Coffee Breaks

Rollin’ with the homies. For the last few years, I tried slogging through graduate school. And, well, for various reasons, I just can’t be educated. So now I’m back at regular-ass jobs again, and being out of the ivory tower can sometimes be fun, in that bizarre “I’m living inThe Office” kind of way. Not that graduate school wasn’t replete with idiot bosses, nauseating ass-kissers, freaks (though not usually the fundamentalist sort), jerks, failed attempts at romance, and the typical melange of dipshittery that we call “humanity” when we’re in polite company. However, working in an actual corporate setting somehow … Continue reading Next Thing You Know, We’ll Be Singing “The Internationale” On Our Coffee Breaks

Jude, Of Interest2 Comments

Adios, 2008

Taking out last year’s trash. Hello hello, First Drafters. I hope everyone’s celebrations went well last night, and that your hangovers this morning are mercifully tolerable. Happy New Year, everyone. And a big thanks to Athenae & Scout for sharing their platform with me. Thanks as well to all our regular contributors, and to most of our commenters. Speaking of comments, I have a topic for you: The first day of the year, which we imbue with so much promise, begins with moans of regret from millions. Discuss. Also, because I have to start off the new year right: Fuck. Continue reading Adios, 2008

Jude, Music

Your Mistletoe Is No Match For My TOW Missile

So, it’s Xmas music you want, eh? I’m including a shout-out to home with Aaron Neville, and some other stuff that I like. The Tori Amos “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas” is just haunting. I heard that one cold, cold December night in New Hampshire ten years ago, and I had to pull to the side of the road to listen to the whole thing. Also, the Drifters kick all kinds of ass. Since we don’t get enough hip hop around here, I threw in some old school Run D.M.C. Finally, what would Christmas be without the Pogues? So … Continue reading Your Mistletoe Is No Match For My TOW Missile

Jude, Of Interest7 Comments

Someone Get Some Valium for Athenae

She’s headed for this town. Once again, a newspaper columnist gets it wrong, wrong, wrong. Hey, dumbshit: blogs aren’t your problem. In addition, you don’t even really address how they might be in your stupid column. And can we cut out this stupid shit about the Golden Age of Journalism, please? I got three words for you, fucko: William. Randolph. Hearst. Instead of whining, try doing your fucking job. Schmuck. Sorry, A. I’ll get the good Scotch out for when you’re in town next, I swear.  Continue reading Someone Get Some Valium for Athenae

Jude, Of Interest10 Comments

Catching Up On A Few Things

I’ve been like one of these. But with less venom. Hey hey, everybody! It’s me again. What? You’ve forgotten about me already? Dang. Well, I’m really busy these days, and the job I’ve got now has no Internets, so I don’t have enough time for readin’ and thinkin’ as in the past. That should change sometime in the future, but for now, I’m afraid I just can’t post as much as I would like to. Anyway, I’ve got a roundup of a few things that have caught my eye, but I haven’t had the time to write about. First of … Continue reading Catching Up On A Few Things

Jude, Of Interest8 Comments

I Got Yer War On Christmas Right Here, Bub

Hey hey, everybody. Sorry for my absence. I’ve been busy with things, and helping Athenae with her slaughtering of journalism. That, plus the ice and snow. Anyway, I just wanted to say how pleased I am that it’s once again time for the War On Christmas. Really, it’s my favorite time of the year. I just can’t wait to go around, saying “Happy Holidays,” and then watching civilization collapse. If I weren’t so busy at the abortion mill, I’d take it up full time. You know us liberal, queer-lovin’ pussies. It’s because of us that you can’t have images like … Continue reading I Got Yer War On Christmas Right Here, Bub

Jude, Of Interest13 Comments

Dear American Media

Yes, this is an actual photo of my computer. Dear American Media: While you’re fixing your various other deficiencies (see Athenae’s posts for, oh, the last four centuries if you need a good place to start), could you please, please, fuckin’please, for the love of Nutella, stop referring to every scandal or possible scandalby appending the suffix “-gate”? This has bothered me for some time. It actually has since you morons tried calling the Iran-Contra scandal “Irangate.” And, of course, you fucks went crazy during the Clinton years, even trying out “Lewinskygate” on us. For fuck’s sakes–you people are supposed … Continue reading Dear American Media

Jude, Of Interest17 Comments

Adventures in False Equivalence

Yes, you. What the fuck, Chris Hedges? Seriously, what the fuck? And you, Salon. What the fuck? It’s bad enough you continue to inflict Camille Paglia on us, you gotta have an interview with this dick, too? So Chris Hedges has a new book about the “New Athiests.” You know, Richard Dawkins, Christopher Hitchens, and Sam Harris. What about them? Well, you see, Mr. Hedges claims that they are “preaching a fundamentalism as dangerous as the religious fundamentalist belief systems they attack.” Uh, dude? Shut the fuck up. Really. I’ll believe that these “New Atheists” are as dangerous as Christian … Continue reading Adventures in False Equivalence

Jude, Of Interest5 Comments

From The Department Of “It’s About Fucking Time”

Thanks for everything, Dick and George. Courtesy of reader Hell Kat, here’s a story from CNN today. An extensive federal report released Monday concludes that roughly one in four of the 697,000 U.S. veterans of the 1990-91 Gulf War suffer from Gulf War illness. That illness is a condition now identified as the likely consequence of exposure to toxic chemicals, including pesticides and a drug administered to protect troops against nerve gas. The 452-page report states that “scientific evidence leaves no question that Gulf War illness is a real condition with real causes and serious consequences for affected veterans.” The … Continue reading From The Department Of “It’s About Fucking Time”