I had a hectic day today, which isn’t always great for blogging.I did bip Joseph Cao around at my own blogbut otherwise the well was dry today. This, however, is a gusher of a Richard Thompson song: Continue reading I Want To See The Bright Lights Tonight
I thought of the usual hysteria over how awful reality television is and how scummy and nasty journalism has become with the advent of that great killer, The Internet, whenI listened to this over the weekend. The world is always about to end. A. Continue reading Our Terrible, Horrible Modern Culture and How It’s Ruining Our Lives
At times in my life, I’ve wanted the powers of law enforcement. To arrest my crackhead neighbors for disturbing the peace by yelling Ludacris lyrics in the alley at 6 a.m. To subpeona information some jackass was stalling on for a story. To put George W. Bush in prison for war crimes. I would exercise eminent domain thehell over the craptastic big-box pharmacy that should have been a bookstore down the block. Not to mention locking up every goddamn van driver who can’t make a left turn downtown in less than 25 agonizing minutes. Oh, have I wanted the powers … Continue reading This ISN’T HOW IT WORKS
Good morning, gentle people – well, I’ve been putting it off for a while, but there’s a stack of Freeper mental sludge drums with “taking their country back” stamped all over them. I’ve had Kibitzer and Adrastos put up some extra plastic sheets on the walls in case any of the toxic Freeper waste splashes out when we open them. (Looks like Dexter’s hobby room in there.)
Let’s crank up the blowers, suit up, and crack that airlock door, shall we?
First up – I think we have the Freeper “We’re not racists” thing in its true perspective, because nothing says tolerance and inclusion like wanting to shoot someone with the wrong skin colour because you don’t like the way they dress.
Pants On Ground Prompts Bullet In Butt
The Smoking Gun ^ | October 4, 2010 | Staff
Posted on Monday, October 04, 2010 12:14:15 PM by50mm
Incensed when two teenagers ignored his demands to pull up their saggy pants, a Memphis man allegedly shot one of the youths in the back, according to police.
Kenneth Bonds was arrested Saturday night and charged with two counts of aggravated assault and jailed on $25,000 bond. Bonds, 45, is pictured in the mug shot at right.
Investigators contend that Bonds admitted to shooting Cameron Tucker, 17, following a September 25 argument on a Memphis sidewalk. The teenager was accompanied by Isaac Taylor, a 16-year-old friend.
Tucker told cops that he and Taylor were walking to a candy store when Bonds “began yelling at them to pull their pants up,” according to a Memphis Police Department arrest warrant affidavit. “Bonds got angry when Tucker and Taylor refused and that’s when the three got into a heated argument,” reported police.
At that point, Bonds allegedly pulled out a pistol and fired a shot at the older boy. The shot missed, but as the boys fled, Bonds continued firing at them. One bullet hit the 17-year-old in the buttocks and exited through his thigh (the boy was treated for the wound at two different hospitals).
A witness, Percy Chalmers, told cops that he saw Bonds “pull a large black semi auto handgun from his waist band” and fire several shots. Both Tucker and Taylor were able to identify Bonds in a photo spread prepared by Memphis police.
When contacted by phone, Bonds reportedly “admitted to shooting Cameron Tucker after an argument,” according to the police affidavit. Bonds was scheduled to be arraigned this morning on the felony counts.
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I’ve wanted to handle droopy drawer situations this way.
Not guilty!
I’ve started telling my daughter’s friends that this is how gays in prison advertise.
Heehee. If you’re going to get arrested, get arrested for doing what everyone else is secretly longing to do.
They actually wear a “normal” pair of underwear. The boxers that you see hanging out are actually an accoutrement to the whole “ensemble.”
I’ve spoken to some of the “men” at the company next door to us, and they explained this to me as simply a social fashion statement. Perhaps I’m white
Okay, if he shot the kid in the butt, how come the kid didn’t fall over dead from brain damage?
This is just wrong and unacceptable… but I’ll bet that young feller
“Young feller”? What’s the matter, gramps – couldn’t spell “whippersnapper”?
.pulls up his shorts next time someone tells him to.
/johnny
They look like they were dressed by a monkey. Oh wait …
My old man used to always have a few 12 g shells around that he had removed the buckshot from.
And replaced them with rock salt…
There wasn’t too many stray dogs or coons around our house!
“Don’t forgret when young urbanites were wearing stocking on their heads.”
Ah the negro turban. Whenever I don’t think I will get assaulted for it, I like to refer to the silly getups as costumes.
I gave up on grumpy.
Now I just go straight to icy cold and venomous.
That’s the beauty of this story. It’s beautiful.We can laugh and discuss it because the hero of the story is — quite decidedly black himself.
The racists are flummoxed…
Rand Paul may be ahead in the polls but DemocratJack Conway is still playing to win the race for Jim Bunning’s seat in the Senate. In fact, Conway’s people have thrown a wicked curveball at Paul with this ad that may resonate with religious voters in Kentucky. Will it work? Beats the hell outta me but I’m glad Conway hasn’t given up. UPDATE: Conway and Paul debate Aqua Buddhism. Rand blames his problem on bloggers but not Athenae specifically.. Continue reading The Return Of Aqua Buddha
Here’s another tune from John Hiatt and the Nashville Queens from German teevee circa 1997. This band featured David Immergluck on lead guitar. Hardcore Hiatt fans called him Pebbles because of his hairdo at that time. Look closely and you’ll see what I mean: Continue reading Native Son
Okay, so last week we did music you love but are ashamed of loving. This week, a really bad movie you can’t help loving. Here’s one of mine: A. Continue reading Weekend Question Thread
Post away. Or our First Lady will KICK YOUR ASS. A. Continue reading Saturday Blogwhoring Thread
We here at First Draft were ahead of the curve on the Brett Favre sexting kerfuffle. I’m not proud of it but who among us does not enjoy a good, or even mediocre, dick joke? I should probably have more class than to pile on now that everyone is snickering about it but I don’t. You can stick that in your cheesehead hat and smoke it or is that stroke it? Anyhoo, in the spirit of helpfulness for which I am known, I would like to suggest a theme song for Mr. Favre in his time of woe. A good … Continue reading Brett Favre’s New Theme Song
Music by Charles Mingus. Lyrics by Joni Mitchell. Jaco Pastorius, Wayne Shorter. Say no more. Continue reading Goodbye Pork Pie Hat
In the twist of history, we remember him as a 24-year-old rounding the bases while waving his helmet in the air. Later that day, he posed for a photo in which he planted a juicy kiss on the sweet spot of his bat. Both images are true. Both images are disingenuous. To know the man they called Maz, you’d have to look at his glove. It was a flat, worn piece of leather that reminded colleagues of an old miner’s glove, harkening back to his days as a child in Wheeling, West Virginia. It had no padding. It had been … Continue reading Maz
We have a blanket in the living room that’s backed with this mangy faux-fur, and Claire just adores it. Out of the corner of your eye, you almost can’t see her burrowed in, but then her little head pops up: A. Continue reading Friday Ferretblogging: Where’s Claire?
You’ve all seen the pictures and heard the astonishing rationalizations from Rich Iott who is a teabagger candidate for Congress in Ohio. He’s also the slam dunk choice for malaka of the week as well as the third malaka from the left in the snap above. <clicking my heels> Herr Iott has spent a lot of time trying to convince people that he dressed up in a German uniform to bond with his kid or that the Waffen SS were just soldiers and not really Nazis. If Herr Iott knew any *actual* history as opposed to theWiking.org version, he’d know … Continue reading Malaka Of The Week: Rich Iott
Della: “You talkin’ to me?” Oscar: “Please let me sleep. Oooh.” Continue reading Friday Catblogging: Attitude
And fuck yeah, NASA! I didn’t watch any of the rescue coverage, but I have been watching videos posted all over the Interwebs, and this movie version of this is going to make Apollo 13 look like that one time you took your dog for a walk and forgot your keys. A. Continue reading Fuck Yeah, Chile!
Seriously, where we get off lecturing people on how to run their societies, I really don’t know. Researchers at Princeton say that without segregation, the expansion of these subprime loans, and the subsequent economic crash, couldn’t have happened. Mortgage brokers needed swaths of communities where people met the following criteria: 1) they didn’t already have a home loan, 2) they were used to predatory lending practices, and 3) there weren’t other financial institutions around to clue buyers into the fact that these subprime loans weren’t a good deal. Segregated communities like those on the South and West sides of Chicago … Continue reading A Country of Assholes
Fun times at TPM: Rich Whitney is the Green party candidate for governor in Illinois this year. But there’s been a small matter of a typo on the state’s electronic voting machines. On electronic voting machines in 23 wards — about half of which are predominantly African-American districts — Whitney’s name isset to appear as “Rich Whitey“. Whitney is unhappy about this and is investigating what remedy he has. For whatever reason, the problem can’t be fixed, even those these are on electronic machines, rather than on paper ballots. Continue reading Rich Whitey Goes Green
Christine O’Donnell caled her opponent Chris Coons a Marxist last night. He is one scary looking dude, after all: Mr. Coons looks more like a CPA than a member of the CPUSA. It’s a tough sell trying to paint him as the next Fidel or Che. Hmm, Lenin *was* bald. Of course, wingnut cupcakes like Ms. O’Donnell don’t know what Marxism is in any event. At least she hasn’t started making jokes about his last name but I bet some wackadoodle somewhere has already done so… Continue reading The Face Of American Marxism?
FromAlbum3 Every time I think the usual suspects can’t get more Full Mental Whackjob… Continue reading First, They Came for the Campbell’s Soup
So I’m browsing around the stupid at Clownhall, and seriously, this is the headline: How Leftists are Killing ‘The Jetsons’ Shoot me now: For the first time in American history, today’s generation is looking at a future that resembles the Flintstones more than the Jetsons. President Obama’s science adviser, John Holdren, preaches the virtues of “de-development,” by which he means the destruction of technological advances; the Obama administration preaches cap and trade policies, which would cripple American standards of living if implemented. Obama and his cronies have no faith whatsoever in human ingenuity and entrepreneurship: the best solutions are always … Continue reading Wherefore Art Thou, George Jetson?
There’s a pretty lively race to succeed Charlie Melancon in the Louisiana Third Congressional District. Teabagger Jeff Landry is the front runner in a race for a seat that won’t exist much longer: the Gret Stet is poised to lose a seat when the census results are in. But Democrat Ravi Sangisetty (that’s right an Indian candidate in the land of LeBlancs and LaBordes) is running a pretty feisty underdog campaign. And Mr. Landry seems to have the odd skeleton in the closer or is that under his house? I’m not sure if Sangisetty is gaining any traction but he’s … Continue reading Dirty Landry
In my mind, this is pretty much what the First Draft Crack Van looks like. Except with ferrets. And speaking of the Van, I’m hoping it’s gonna roll for Election Night. Maybe it’s a little premature to pester Athenae about, but on the other hand it’s never too early to pressure wash the walls and shampoo that chartreuse shag carpet. The Gossip, from their new albumMusic for Men. Continue reading WWTFUS: Kitten Punch 3
Some malaka wasted some perfectly good bacon in Secession/Thurmond/DeMintville. I’m not sure if this qualifies as porky tagging or as a particularly greasy hate crime. You decide: Slices of bacon were laid down on a brink walkway to the Florence Islamic Center in Florence, S.C. on Sunday in a manner that spelled out “PIG CHOPS.” The incident — evidently aimed the center because of the Islamic dietary restrictions against pork — is just the latest in a string of anti-Muslim episodes around the country. In fact this isn’t the first time even this particular mosque has been hit — earlier … Continue reading Bacon is a terrible thing to waste
Okay, look. First of all, it don’t matter worth a shit if I’m mean to Obama or not. I know this. I know that the difference between his having a shitty presidency and his having a great one is not how hard I am on him on my website. And second, I’m trying to be patient here. The world is FUCKED, and Bush had eight years to break everything. Obama had about ten minutes to fix it before everybody went sadly and predictably nuts because there was a black man in the White House and also a socialist Marxist Muslim. … Continue reading You’re Arguing With a Martian About His Homework
So what Clarice is really saying is, the people of the Twelve Worlds have gone so far into Ravenclaw and Slytherin that Griffyndor isn’t even a possibility anymore. And letting faith speak for itself isn’t working, because sex and drugs — as she well knows — are way more awesome than self-denial. So how do you sell self-denial to people who can have everything in thereal world, and double that in the Matrix? By building a disgusting highway interchange that substitutes Slytherin and Ravenclaw for Griffyndor, because they’re too stupid to know the difference. They’ll drink the sand. And if you scare them bad enough, the downsides of that — the withering and eventual dropping-off of your leperous vestigial soul — won’t even matter anymore.
It’s the most cynical, nasty, wrong-headed thing imaginable. It’s also precisely the way we, as a country and a world, do tend to talk ofreligion: “I offer you a religion that removes the need for faith. A religion of certainty.” That’s the most hateful possible way to describe both sides of this fake, dumb IRL debate. It’s also how Dawkins got rich, because that’s what it looks like to a Ravenclaw: Like sheep, praying to Santa Claus. She’s not wrong — they’re not wrong — but she’s right on such an adverse, horrific vector that I’d rather see the apocalypse come about. (Luckily…)
Which is sort of something my doctor told me a few weeks ago, during one of our periodic Is This Normal or Is This The Crazy conversations. Some things just suck, hard, and they’ll suck until they don’t. Death. Disappointment. Rejection. Breakups. Endings in general. They just suck, and you can’t force them to not suck, and you can’t make a secret reward where there isn’t one for having gone through it, and you can’t make the suck Virtuous and you can’t make it Necessary and you sure as hell can’t make it shorter.
It is exactly what it is. No matter how much you drink or work or run or think, it still sucks. You just have to keep walking upright. It sucks. It hurts. Sometimes you want to lie down and kick your feet and flail your fists like a two-year-old. Guess what? So does everybody else. Everybody else feels like this, at least a certain portion of the time. That’s not much of a comfort, but it isn’t The Crazy talking. The reason I say all the time that we get back up is seriously, tell me what else there is to do? What other choices do we have? This show is about what if we had other choices, and I think it’s pretty clear how horribly wrong it’s going to end up being.
Continue reading “Every TV Set That Has Them Lit: Caprica Thread”
Mr. Obvious meets Adrastos’ obsession with the Jayhawks. Here’s a live version ofSmile complete with clips fromThe Straight Story for some obscure reason. Guess I could have called this post, Gary Louris meets David Lynch: Continue reading Smile
Rare good news made even better by chatter that the Pentagon may comply with the order. Let’s hope the DOJ is on the same page as well: A federal judge ordered an immediate halt Tuesday to discharges of openly gay and lesbian soldiers under the “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy, rejecting the Obama administration’s request to wait until Congress acts on the issue. U.S. District Judge Virginia Phillips of Riverside ruled the 1993 law unconstitutional Sept. 9, saying it intrudes on service members’ personal lives and freedom of expression and reduces military effectiveness by needlessly excluding qualified personnel. Her injunction … Continue reading Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, Don’t Appeal
SCDP may be in deep trouble butMad Men bounced back big time after a rare off episode. The sense of desperation felt by Don and the gang is palpable: everything they do seems to backfire and every new client they solicit tells them to call back in 6 months. Why? Nobody expects them to make it. On to the usual random and discursive thoughts: Midge, the artist from the Village, who was Don’s season-1 chick on the sly returns. She appears in the lobby and claims to be looking for work from the Time-Life octopus. It turns out that she … Continue reading Mad Men Thread: It’s a doggy dog world
I’m really getting intoBoardwalk Empire. FormerSopranos writer Terence Winter has chosen a large canvas to paint on and they’re doing it well thus far. Is it just me or does Nucky’s squeeze Lucy Danziger remind anyone else of the character of Susan Alexander Kane inCitizen Kane? They don’t look alike BUT their voices are similar and they both have a sarcastic diva quality in common. Also, when the news reel guy tracks the second Mrs, Kane down, she’s singing in a dive in Atlantic City. Coincidence or hommage by Terence Winter and executive producer Martin Scorsese? Continue reading Deep Boardwalk Empire Thought
This country doesn’t completely suck. A. Continue reading Smile