Category Archives: Michael F

Oh, For Fuck’s Sake


Lindsey Graham had a loud harrumph and muttered out loud about how difficult it is to find good help these days before presumably waddling off to get fitted for a monocle, tailcoat, and whatever other snob apparel suits someone worried that a few extra dollars for a few extra months will bring on sloth and other undesirable traits.

Fuck him, fuck them, fuck ’em all.

Lindsey Graham makes a hundred and seventy four thousand dollars a year plus expenses to work part time. He could easily ride out months if not years of forced unemployment, not that he’ll have to. His paychecks didn’t vanish overnight…and have left him with a tidy little nest egg. Meanwhile, millions of people who’ve been working harder than ever for, when adjusted for inflation, less and less money…and are now being accused, on the record, of being lazy and greedy.

Want to see lazy and greedy, Senator Graham? Take a look at yourself and your colleagues.

And fuck the fuck off.

End Of The Line


Vote enough incompetent dingbats into office and eventually you’ll get an incompetent dingbat response to a genuine crisis. And so it’s proving to be with DJT, who follows a long line of not-ready-for-prime-time GOP executives…or candidates for executive. Reagan was their darling, but Robert Taft and even Alf Landon did their best to deny reality and insist 19th Century governing styles were…plenty good enough.

Nope. Not in the 20th Century and sure as hell not now.

The era of big government being over was always bullshit triangulation, and the trope about it being the problem was always a mask for bigotry. People were never really upset about the size/spending of the feds…it was always a matter of who it allegedly went to (as we all recall, the Gipper insisted it went to “strapping young bucks” and “welfare queens.”)

So…the GOP has discovered their inner Keynes, and lord knows there are a ton of people who could use a few extra dollars — or simply a few dollars — now that their income’s been slashed or eliminated (not to mention squeezed over the course of decades). But the national leadership to guide us through this crisis, at least from the GOP, simply doesn’t exist.

We’ll have to ride it out as best as we can, and hope that once it’s over, there are enough pieces left to pick up and put back together…

Does He Really Look Like A Guy With A Plan?


Wow, what a flop, though as usual, major media is doing their best to downplay what had to be the weirdest address-from-the-Oval-Office-to-reassure-the-nation ever.

Looking and sounding like he was on strong medication or had just been awakened, DJT managed to stumblebum/blunder his way into falsely claiming a ban on European “cargo” — lotta good that would do — while oddly exempting the UK from travel restrictions because…well, not really sure why.

And he concluded — to be fair, after he thought the camera was off — with something that looked for all the world like an orange-stain-take-on-the-Looney- Toons-signoff.

That’s All, Folks.

And the political press is gearing up for a months long cycle of Biden-is-gaffe-prone stories?


We’re still at the beginning of this, and who knows whether it will be a matter of worst fears being realized or not, but I can’t think of a more incompetent reaction than what we’ve seen from Team Trump. It’s stupid…on an epic level.

Think of what sort of reaction we’d see if the president was a Democrat. Fox Noise would literally be that, and I’m guessing the rest would, sheeplike, follow along (“the administration was caught off-guard and is scrambling to restore trust”)…yet for Trump, they’ve set the bar so goddamn low you need a backhoe to find it.



One Small Step


Six/seven hours to vote? That’s ridiculous…though also hopeful. People willing to wait that long to cast a ballot must really want to make a statement. And if the ballot is in the Democratic Primary — a primary — the statement is presumably not one in support of Orange Narcissus.

But it also underscores just how cynical and ugly the entire GOP has become. Long lines, reduced early voting hours, onerous registration processes…

This is voter suppression. It’s election theft.

And, oddly, barely reported as such by the allegedly librul media.

Just another way the game is being played by GOP rules and on their playing field. I’m trying to imagine the spittle-flecked rage from Hannity or Carlson if GOP voters were subjected to long waits. Hell, I’m so old I remember Bill O’Reilly screeching about the New Black Panthers (who, if I remember, weren’t even at a white suburban precinct…just saying).

Not that I want to settle for yet another lesser-of-evils — I’m getting old and can’t really remember an election when I wasn’t lesser-of-evil voting — but with basic stuff like voting itself on the line, and with the alternative being, sorry to repeat, a second term for Trump, i.e., the Vengeance-is-Mine farewell tour, maybe it’s an election where we need to.

Because if we don’t…game over?

And Another Reminder…


…of the kind of person who epitomizes the DJT — and now GOP — approach to government, short-lister-for-getting-cast-as Nosferatu-if-there’s-ever-a-remake and until recently Washington’s least eligible bachelor, Stephen Miller

One afternoon in November, a half-dozen government officials sat at a conference table in the White House, waiting for the arrival of Stephen Miller, a senior adviser to Donald Trump. Miller had summoned officials from the Departments of Homeland Security, State, and Justice to discuss a new Administration policy initiative: a series of agreements with the governments of Central America that would force asylum seekers to apply for protection in that region instead of in the United States. Miller, who had helped make the deals, wanted to know when their provisions could go into effect…Miller has a habit of berating officials, especially lower-ranking ones, for an agency’s perceived failures. Chad Wolf, now the acting head of D.H.S., used to advise colleagues to placate Miller by picking one item from his long list of demands, and vowing to execute it. “It’s a war of attrition,” Wolf told them. “Maybe he forgets the rest for a while, and you buy yourself some time.”

One participant in the November meeting pointed out that El Salvador didn’t have a functioning asylum system. “They don’t need a system,” Miller interrupted. He began speaking over people, asking questions, then cutting off the answers.

As the meeting ended, Miller held up his hand to make a final comment. “I didn’t mean to come across as harsh,” he said. His voice dropped. “It’s just that this is all I care about. I don’t have a family. I don’t have anything else. This is my life.”

Miller, who was a speechwriter during the campaign, is now Trump’s longest-serving senior aide. He is also an Internet meme, a public scourge, and a catch-all symbol of the racism and malice of the current government. In a cast of exceptionally polarizing officials, he has embraced the role of archvillain. Miller can be found shouting over interviewers on the weekend news shows or berating reporters in the White House briefing room; he has also vowed to quell a “deep state” conspiracy against Trump. When he’s not accusing journalists of harboring a “cosmopolitan bias” or denying that the Statue of Liberty symbolizes America’s identity as a nation of immigrants, he is shaping policy and provoking the President’s most combative impulses.

Of thirty current and former officials I interviewed, not one could recall a White House adviser as relentless as Miller, or as successful in imposing his will across agencies. These officials resented him as an upstart and mocked his affectations—his “arrogant monotonal voice” and tin-eared bombast—but few were comfortable going on the record, even after leaving the government. Miller is famously vindictive, and, as Trump runs for a second term, he is sure to grow only more powerful. “Miller doesn’t have to get Trump to believe everything he does,” one of the officials told me. “He just has to get Trump to say it all.”

When Miller and I spoke by phone, it was off the record. Without an audience, he gave the same message at half the volume—a litany of talking points about all the ways in which the President had delivered on his campaign promises. Afterward, the White House sent me a quote for attribution: “It is the single greatest honor of my life to work for President Trump and to support his incredible agenda.”

Imagine Stephen Miller in a second Trump term.

There’s nothing wrong with a serious discussion/debate, or whatever you want to call it, to consider and select the best candidate to take on, um, not to mince words, the nascent fascism of Trump. But whether the winning candidate is my personal preference (her last name rhymes with Soren) or whether I once again grimly exercise my civic duty by opting for the lesser of evils, Trump will forever remain the greater of evils, in no small part because of people like Stephen Miller.

Oh, and that certain idiot Dems (e.g., Chris Matthews) and ostensibly Never Trumpers (Bill Kristol) think Bernie Sanders is too much…goddamn.

It was bad enough that Democrats abandoned George McGovern in 1972 for Nixon…but Donald Trump is no Dick Nixion. He’s much worse.

Begging Pardon


So, am still far, far away from the USA, which means I wasn’t around for last night’s debate or DJTs festival of pardons on, I guess, Tuesday… but in what I hope doesn’t become something that bores people to tears, I’ll repeat last week’s mantra: Anyone but Trump…

And yeah that even includes, gag, Mike Bloomberg, though god knows I hope it doesn’t come to that.

Trump this week was a preview of Trump, The Second Term. Just like how super storms these days are a preview of the new normal after global warming.

Imagine this week’s Trump…every week.

I can’t.

A Modest Reminder


So, am fortunate to be traveling/taking a break from, well, everything up to and including the Northern Hemisphere. But while out of the loop, I’m not entirely disconnected.

I did see, though, some hand wringing from the usual suspects. Democrats in disarray. Is Bernie too far left?

Well, to repeat what Adrastos said below, the house is on fire. The enemy is the guy pictured above.

If Sanders wins the nomination, I’ll vote for him. Same with Buttigieg. Same with Amy Klobuchar, Elizabeth Warren, or even Joe Biden if either of the latter two gains any traction (and as an aside, more than ever I think Iowa and New Hampshire have outweighed any usefulness in first-in-the-nation status. Time to move to national or at least regional primaries)… sorry to digress, but I’ll vote for any Democrat over Trump.

And if you think otherwise, um, that means you’re part of the problem.

Because if you think Trump is awful — and for fuck’s sake, he is — imagine what a re-elected Trump will be.

Same As It Ever Was


Sure, credit where it’s due, but let’s not elevate Mitt to the status of house god, Republican Daddy Hero, Last Honest Man in Washington, etc., etc.

Romney took a look at Pennywise and applied his conscience and Mormon faith (where he’s worked in an official capacity) to reach the unsurprising conclusion that DJT was self-serving and crooked.

Makes me wonder what’s going on with other GOP senators who claim to be faithful (assuming they’re not prosperity Gospel types).

Oh, and Mitt’s “suffering” will be, what? Estrangement from a man and movement that went out of its way to publicly humiliate him? Aww…poor guy. He can cry in his non-caffeinated, non-alcoholic beverage in any of his half dozen houses or three story garage.

Or he can become a fixture on some cable news network. Howard Baker for our time.

The foregone conclusion of the impeachment trial is another example of how we can’t rely on or expect any GOP hero to come to the rescue. Handing Trump his walking papers will have to be done by ourselves, because Trump and the GOP have merged/morphed into a freak show carnival ride alliance that all can see is deranged and damaged, but from which none of them can jump off.

Besides, while it’s not going to be easy to show DJT the door, it can be done. Sure, his minions are rabid creeps, but we outvoted them four years ago. He’s president by arcane rules, not a popular mandate, no matter how often he tries to pass off that lie.

We shouldn’t forget that.

See No Evil

Long Live the Red Sun of the World's People, Chairman Mao, Chinese Cultural Revolution Poster

The show will go on for a few days, or a few days more if, by some odd set of circumstances, you don’t get the rest of the GOP caucus — excuse me, the GOP cult — to fold like, take your pick, Cory Gardner or a cheap card table.

C’mon…Mitt? Hahahaha.

Sure, watching Bolton testify wouldn’t hurt, but how much more evidence do you need, and how much more evidence will the MAGAts ignore?

Lev Parnas — who’s wearing an ankle monitor — is less delusional than the cultists, who’ve gone all in.

And, for who? Donald J (could be for John, could be for Jackass) Trump.

What the hell? Is George W. Bush just a lesser-of-evils in their eyes? He’d get their vote, but is kind of sophisticated and nuanced?

At this point, I doubt evidence that Trump was Putin’s personal valet would change any GOP mind. I can picture his Senate defenders saying, sure, he’s a paid Russian agent looking to destroy the country from within, but if you’re the president, that’s ok…

And the GOP base would erupt in cheers. Drink up.


Coming Attractions


On Tuesday, Moscow Mitch — who hates being called Moscow Mitch — anyway, Moscow Mitch was so determined to display how thoroughly zombified his caucus is that he earned a new nickname from Carl Bernstein…while his zombie caucus stumbled and shuffled across the floor of the chamber, dutifully doing as they were told in vote after vote.

Yesterday they did the same as the House Democratic Managers presented a devastating case.

Today will be no different.

The final vote, when it comes, will be Democrats on one side, Zombies (Zomblicans?) slowly shuffling around on the other.

DJT will proclaim it the greatest victory ever, far surpassing the defeat of Nazi Germany.

Which means that, while impeachment definitely will leave a mark, Trumpism — which is now the entire GOP — can only be defeated at the ballot box.

And even then, it will continue to shuffle around, undead, looking for brains to consume…

The Lev & Rudy Show


Well, the relationship is presumably shattered beyond repair — breaking up is hard — but until then, it was kind of like…Scarface-meets-The-Odd-Couple-meets-Borat-meets-Who-is-America-meets…the fucking United States government, i.e., the reigning global superpower.

A global superpower that’s been…MAGAtized.

Hell, Parnas, judging from last night’s interview, seems the sanest of the damn bunch. Rudy’s a gibberish machine, and Trump himself went off on a no-shit-no-pun-intended-obsession/extendend-rant-about toilets last night.

And it’s not just his equally psychopathic base (and the failure of the media to do a proper job of reporting). It’s the entire GOP cult. They’re all in.

And we’ll be in…deep…if he gets another term.

President Little Mittens Declares Victory In War Against The Sea


OK, maybe that’s a little unfair — to Caligula — and DJT’s performance yesterday was more doggie downer (am guessing that will change if/when he makes it a highlight in his wingnut-bizarro-free-association rallies.)

Besides, what the hell, unilaterally declaring victory beats the hell out of DJT putting his stubby little fingers on any button that might escalate things. Also, with his briefing of Congress so pathetic it made Mike Lee and Rand Paul gag, it looks like the real men who were salivating over the chance to REALLY fuck things up will have to wait a little longer.

No word on if/when Trump nominates a horse for counsel.

And you know, it’d almost be funny to watch Pompeo, Mulvaney, and Pence getting ordered to waddle along a beach collecting sea shells as spoils.

America’s Gaslighters


Happy New Year! And why not ring in the new with bugfuck insanity? It was what, barely a month ago when Trump was giving Rudy the who-is-this-Michael-Cohen-of-whom-you-speak? treatment and buses everywhere were being prepped for Ghouliani to be found underneath…minus Rudy’s insurance policy, whatever that was…

Or, what the hell, maybe he does have something, since he’s apparently back in the circle for however long enough, along with twin goons Lev and Igor and whoever else…and they’re all going to insist that we’re the ones with the problem, we’re the ones who support corruption, we’re the ones up to our necks and beyond in Russia or Ukraine…and who are we going to believe? Them or our lying eyes?

This year’s going to be interesting, and not always in a good way.

Oh, and forget about the media doing its job. Two words: Chuck. Todd.

Welcome to the future.

Trump L’Oeil


Happy Boxing Day — and in the spirit, here’s a target if you’re inclined to practice a jab or cross.

DJT did his part to merit jab or cross status, celebrating Christmas by “lashing out” and generally acting like a baby — is that even news anymore?

And while I can’t complain about much if anything personally, I think the best present for next Christmas would be a pink slip for the present occupant of the White House.

Fire Trump in 2020.

Also, Happy Solstice.

Moscow Mitch Has A Sad


Human Turtle (not entirely certain about the human part) Moscow Mitch — he really hates being called Moscow Mitchexpressed a new found love of precedent following the House Impeachment vote of Donald Trump, and the announcement that the measure could be delayed in being reported to the Senate unless and until he agrees to at least the appearance of fairness.

In fairness, with a nickname like Moscow Mitch, would you expect anything else besides a show trial Vladimir Putin would be proud of?

Oh, and hats off to the Democrats, particularly in swing districts, who votes yes.

Yesterday morning I heard, on NPR of all places, the kind of analysis you’d get from old Soviet TASS or Pravda, namely that Democrats who won midterm elections in Trump leaning districts would need to be careful, because, you know, Trump.

Or maybe Democrats in Trump leaning districts WON midterm elections because of, you know, Trump. You think? Your good old librul media, hard at work.

Anyway…under the circumstances, not a bad outcome.

Whenever Moscow Mitch — and did I mention he hates being called Moscow Mitch? — anyway, when Moscow Mitch emerges from his shell and mutters “hrrumph,” it’s a good sign.

If Donald Trump Was A James Bond Villain


Well, Trump WOULDN’T be a James Bond villain. Bond villains have more class. They have names like Goldfinger, not Shitheel.

Trump’s level isn’t Bond villain, it’s wrestling heel, which he’s actually done. And the impeachment hearings offer more evidence. His style is crude, ham-fisted, heavy-handed, cloddish; his associates are almost comically villainous: Lev, Igor, Rudy, Devin, Gym…his alternate narrative of “what really happened” is straight out of the wrestling hype playbook, right down to the loud, fast paced hectoring offset by epic self-pity.

And if you don’t find the spectacle…repulsive, well…

Just A Bunch Of Fucking Goons


Stupid Watergate continues, and despite the the best efforts by the librul media to pull out all the usual flags — Democrats in disarray, the GOP’s terrified of their base (well, that one…yeah, maybe they should be a little afraid), both sides, Melania (for real — christ) — one thing I keep noticing, in part because I’m still dealing with a busy work schedule, is that, regardless of what you think of the pro-Trump side…at a glance, they all look like a bunch of fucking goons. No lie.

And if what you’ve heard or seen at the hearing, or even simply over the last three years of the daily assault on the senses that is the DJT administration, doesn’t make you look up and say, goddamn, what a bunch of goons, then…

I only did up four, but offhand I can’t think of a single Trump administration official, or hanger on, or Congressional cheerleader, who doesn’t look like they could easily fit in a book of classic gangster mug shots. Contrast them with the career civil servants and legal scholars who testified (and consider Trump Junior’s hack statement that his dad was elected to fire them).

So…sure, the press has to sell newspapers, or at least the eyeballs of those who read newspapers (or view/hear other forms of media) to advertisers, but I can’t imagine anyone having a look and not being able to make up their mind.

You’re either comfortable with the goon squad, or not.

I’m not.

And So This Is Christm…Um, Thanksgiving


Continuing from last week, work’s been super busy (long story), enough to keep me from following the news cycle as much as usually do. It happens.

Still, I made an effort to keep an eye out, and…it was another shitty week for DJT.

Even in the confines of a “cozy interview” with fellow dirt bag Billo, Trump was explaining and backpedaling, and like they say, in politics, when you’re explaining, you’re losing.

So, something to be thankful for.

Have a safe and happy holiday.

His Legacy


So..the debate? Nah, didn’t watch. Besides, the Democrats could nominate an empty podium at this point and I’d vote for it, lesser of evils and all that…

And, will spare the details, but it’s been a distracting week for me otherwise, and my usual habit/hobby of paying attention was limited by…work.

That said, and  with the hope that I’ll never devolve into an actual low-information voter, I feel like my perspective was a little more, I dunno, similar to someone who might only catch a bit of news now and again.

And for those folks, Trump had a pretty shitty week…but also a pretty normal week. Because…everything revealed thus far in the impeachment hearing seems so utterly believable for someone like Donald J. Trump.

If Richard Nixon was the dark side of the American Spirit, Trump is the tawdry, cheap, clown veneer. He’s dictator chic, reality television, and PT Barnum minus the charm or intrigue…Dick Nixon as a warped, old, fat-Elvis impersonator, a greedy liar who’d stomp your fingers for a Rex doubloon, and the worst bead hog at Mardi Gras…someone who thinks a neckful of gaudy plastic implies elevated status.

Not even Las Vegas. More like Atlantic City, if not Biloxi.

His associates are equally skeevy. Lev, Konstatin, Igor…Rudy Buttdial.

And while that very cheapness might motivate his rally goers, I think the rest of the country still has just enough basic decency, if not self-respect, to realize how much of a mistake 2016 was.

Trump, not that I much like it, will go down in history — he’s on the list of presidents (hang my head in shame). But it doesn’t mean he deserves a legacy in stone.

And, good lord, I don’t even want to think of how chintzy a DJT library’s going to be…

A Tale Of Two Hearings

What We Saw


What They Saw


To me it would take the sort of squinting reserved for reading the finest of fine prints in the harsh glare of the brightest of bright summer days — or a intravenous Fox Noise feed at fire hose volume — but I guess if you’re all in with Trump, you’re all in.

And they’re all in.

So, what to a normal person is pretty clear evidence of disgusting, corrupt, petty if not criminal venality becomes in the light-bending black hole of MAGAtry an attempt to root out corruption, and that’s their story and they’re sticking to it.

If Trump killed someone on 5th Avenue, they’d say the victim needed killing.

If clear evidence emerged that Trump was licking the boots of Vladimir Putin, they’d insist it was the classiest, hugest, bigliest boot-licking they’d ever witnessed. And why would anyone be against licking Putin’s boots, unless they hated Donald Trump?

Cult doesn’t even begin to describe.

But I’ll still insist he’s bluffing, and he’s vulnerable. Not that I much like citing David Frum, but credit where it’s due, and yeah, it’s due here.