Wherefore Art Thou, George Jetson?

So I’m browsing around the stupid at Clownhall, and seriously, this is the headline:

How Leftists are Killing ‘The Jetsons’

Shoot me now:

For the first time in American history, today’s generation is looking at a future that resembles the Flintstones more than the Jetsons. President Obama’s science adviser, John Holdren, preaches the virtues of “de-development,” by which he means the destruction of technological advances; the Obama administration preaches cap and trade policies, which would cripple American standards of living if implemented. Obama and his cronies have no faith whatsoever in human ingenuity and entrepreneurship: the best solutions are always proscriptive and prophylactic.

Obama thinks your hybrid car sucks. Go buy a rusty Ford, you fucking hippies!

Also, like The Virgin Ben would know from prophylactics.

Okay, even I’m ashamed of that one.

So what’s this column about? It’s about the rights of morons to crash their cars into whatever because they’re too busy yammering on their phones to drive.

No, really.

While driving, how many of us use our cell phones to check on the safety of our loved ones, to do business or even to make emergency calls? How many of us would be willing to give up those conveniences — and, in some cases, those necessities — in order to satisfy LaHood’s safety requirements?

If you can afford a phone, nine times out of ten it comes with a small hands-free thing. I have a cheapass phone that sucks, and even it comes with a cheapass headset thing that sucks. So come on.

I’m not anti-phone, and I’m not even rabidly anti-phone in the car. I ride my bike wherever I can and I’ve been almost hit or doored not by people on phones but by stupid assholes who just don’t look where they’re going because they’re stupid. Take away the phone, they’ll still be stupid. But this is a little … really, you have the God-given freedom to do whatever in your car, even update Facebook from OnStar? And by disallowing this obviously insane thing, the government wants Astro the Jetson dog to die?

Google, the most innovative company on the planet at the moment, is busily creating vehicles with the capacity to drive in traffic without human intervention.

Okay.

I don’t know about you, but I still want my flying car. Maybe I’ll never get it. But I’d sure as hell rather live in a world where the only limits are those imposed by nature rather than by man. We all deserve a “Jetsons” future. If government continues to grow, that future will fade into oblivion.

Gotcha. Judy Jetson will never take her top off for you if you don’t get your Google car, and also Obama sucks. You should have just said that from sentence one and saved us all the trouble.

A.

12 thoughts on “Wherefore Art Thou, George Jetson?

  1. dr2chase says:

    He’s half-right, but it’s not the fault of liberals. If we had sense, we’d be using bicycles for a lot more transport.
    The car safety guys should go talk to the public health guys about safety. The best way a self-driving car could enhance safety, is for it to check the distance of its journey, and if it’s under a mile, it would tell you to get out of the car and walk or bike. One internet stat (not sourced to my satisfaction) is that the health risk of not-walking/biking is 10-20 times larger than the crash risk of walking/biking (per-mile, walking is much more dangerous than biking — you can look it up). Another stat says that the annual mortality rate (adjusted for risk factors) for people who do not bike to work, is 39% higher than for those who do. Car crashes kill nowhere near that many people — no amount of technology that leaves you sitting on your passive butt in a car, can close that safety gap.
    So, all that right-wing blather about crime and self-protection and avoiding cities and gangs and stuff — if it cons them into moving to the burbs, so they have to drive everywhere, then they made a losing safety trade.
    This stuff drives me nuts. You’d think we were a nation of two-year-olds.

  2. Jude says:

    Wasn’t George Jetson a crummy, lazy worker in a crummy, boring job overseen by a rotten, overbearing boss?
    Oh, right. That’s what the right-wingerswant everyone to have. If Jetson were a producer, he’d be the one running Spacely Sprockets, building transcontinental railroads and buildings and going Galt when future government threatens to raise his top marginal tax rate to the absurdly high level of 35%.

  3. paul says:

    How many pedestrians, cyclists and other motorists would really prefer not toDIE just so that this jerkwad can have the convenience/necessity of talking and texting in traffic?
    This would be just funny if there weren’t millions more jerkwads nodding sagely and putting piles of money behind the attitudes that go along with such hateful tripe.

  4. hoppy says:

    Repubs really have to stretch to create reasons for opposing every single thing the Democratic Congress and President tried to do. Next, I suspect we will hear that the true reason for global warming is the health insurance reform bill. Ho hum.

  5. FeralLiberal says:

    So Benny and the Jetsons wants his flying car? The moronic drivers I encounter on my daily commute can barely handle controlling a vehicle in 2 dimensions, dog forbid navigating in three…and texting at the same time???

  6. MapleStreet says:

    Does he miss the point that safety is a limit also?
    That global warming will impose some rather hefty limits?
    That sustainability is a limit of nature and not some arbitrary limit imposed by the govt?

  7. virgotex says:

    are those imposed by nature rather than by man.
    let’s get rid of the stop signs and speed limits and the yellow dividing lines and those damn bumpy reflecter thingies while we’re at it.

  8. It’s about FREE-DUMB. Freedom to be dumb, it’s our God-given right as red-blooded Merkins! Yes our soldiers are dying in Afghanistan and Iraq so that some asshole has the freedom to text while driving.
    Give me a fucking break. These people are whining because they are opporessed by COMMON FUCKING SENSE.

  9. pansypoo says:

    see how evolved republikkklans would be if we went gault on THEIR asses.

  10. thebewilderness says:

    Srsly? Having to pull over to use your cell in order not to cause a traffic accident is a dreadful imposition? How does he feel about stop signs and speed limits? Using your turn signals while talking on the cell?
    Stupid or lying, stupidorlying? Who could know?

  11. somethingblue says:

    PALIN/DEMINT ’12
    Because we all deserve a “Jetsons” future.

  12. montag says:

    Very funny that a guy who wouldn’t know shit from shinola, sodium chloride from dihydrogen monoxide, is ranting on about Obama being a Luddite who’s singlehandedly going to destroy technological advancement.
    Good thing the nanny state is there to protect Shapiro from himself. This is a guy who’d stick his tongue in an electrical socket to see what electricity tastes like (thank you, thank you, thank you, TBogg).

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