To Mr. A, as I’m missing a trip to the Chicagoland area to spend a weekend teaching kids how to report, write and annoy the administrators at their schools. It’s convention season, which means I’m running my ass off all over the Twin Cities, dodging people wearing some of the ugliest team colors ever conceived. (Seriously, who the hell looked at maroon and gold and said, “Sweet! Wait until we make polyester uniforms out of this for our MARCHING BAND!”)
I wish I could be there, buddy. You are the older brother I never had, desperately wanted and always needed. Miss you more than you know and you are on my mind now more than ever.
I hope you have a great time with The Missus and The Midget. Make sure she gets all the cat-cat time she can handle. Don’t let her eat too many ferret treats.
If I don’t see you, have a happy birthday and treat your wife to all the love she deserves.