Instant pudding

That is not a misprint, it is what Obama turned Romney into this evening: pudding, very vanilla pudding. For the first half hour, Mittbot held his own but then his synapses misfired and he went all 404 error messagey out there. Hell, he even started sweating like Tricky Dick and his spray tan began melting. Boehner beware…

Seriously, other than a few astonishing issue pirouettes, Mitt went into rope-a-dope mode, and played for a draw. He didn’t get it; although his stance as a born again dove was calculated to appeal to undecided women voters in (where else?) the Ohio suburbs. Guess they’re not calling them soccer moms this time around, which is a great relief to me. Why not little league moms?

In the end, this election will boil down to the ground game and who gets their voters to the polls in the swing states. At times, it feels as if they’re running for President of Ohio but that’s the electoral college for you; as long as we have that anachronism, it will always boil down to a few swing states. Hopefully this time around they won’t:

In other good news, my San Francisco Giants rallied from a 3-1 series deficit and beat the St Louis Cardinals 9-0. The game ended in a driving rain but, hey, I didn’t have to sit through it so it didn’t bother me. I did, however, suffer through Joe Buck, the Luke Russert of sportscasters, but not for the entire game, most of which I spent hunkered down in the Crack Van snickering at Romney.

I am looking forward to the upcoming blue state World Series against the Detroit Tigers. Of course, the Giants’ reward for beating the Cards is having to face Justin Verlander who has been pitching like a gentile Sandy Koufax for the last month or so. Yeah, I know, Verlander is a right-hander but I wanted to use the phrase gentile Sandy Koufax so sue me. Btw, Verlander hails from Goochland, Virginia, which is within spitting distance of Dr. A’s hometown. Okay, that’s not true either. (Staunton is 83 miles away from Goochland, which is a gloriously silly name.) I blame it on an overexposure to Willard the mendacious. These debates have been hard on my verisimilitude, y’all.

Finally, “I love teachers” who are, of course, associated with binders but that was last week’s meme…

2 thoughts on “Instant pudding

  1. Hmmm. “A gentile Sandy Koufax.” Drysdale might have had something to say about that. Actually, I agree. I feel about Verlander like Roger Angell wrote about Koufax in 1966: “only members of the Flat Earth Society are prepared to bet that Koufax can lose two Series games in a row.” Unfortunately, he never got the chance to pitch a second game in that Series.

  2. Yay, somebody commented on my gentile Sandy Koufax line. Verlander is much better than DD. He getting to be in a class with Marichal and Gibson too but gentile Koufax was funnier.

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