Malaka Of The Week: Manassas, VA City Police

Zealotry in literally applying the letter of the law in a way that defies common sense can constitute malakatude just as surely as political buffoonery. That is why the Manassa, VA City Police as an entity is/are malaka/malakas of the week:

The teen is facing two felony charges, for possession of child pornography and manufacturing child pornography, which could lead not only to incarceration until he’s 21, but inclusion on the state sex offender data base for, possibly, the rest of his life. David Culver of NBC Washington first reported the story and interviewed the teen’s guardian, his aunt, who was shocked at the lengths Prince William authorities were willing to go to make a sexting case in juvenile court.

“The prosecutor’s job is to seek justice,” said the teen’s defense lawyer, Jessica Harbeson Foster. “What is just about this? How does this advance the interest of the Commonwealth? This is a 17-year-old who goes to school every day, plays football, has never been in trouble with the law before. Now he’s saddled with two felonies and the implication that he’s a sexual predator. I don’t mind trying the case. My goal is to stop the search warrant. I don’t want him to go through that. Taking him down to the hospital so he can get an erection in front of all those cops, that’s traumatizing.”

Consensual sexting between anyone is, well, gross, and between minors it's, well, creepy. But the idea of taking a brand spanking new erect dick pic is creepier than creepy. It's also malakatude taken to its literal extreme. Are the police going to hire a fluffer Boogie Nights style to produce the desired tumescence? Are they going to give the boy some porn to beat off to? Should consensual stupidity ruin a 17 year old's life?The mind reels and the stomach churns

The first time I heard about this story, I thought it came from the Onion. When Josh Marshall posted about it, I realized that it was true. Josh sums it up better than I can:

I think we know our laws about sexting and purported sexual predation have gotten totally f'd up when, in order to prosecute a 17 year old for exchanging naked pictures with his 15 year old girlfriend, prosecutors get a warrant to compel the 17 year old boy to submit to what amounts to a mini-porn shoot with a police photographer.

Sounds like the cops had a big bowl of stupid for breakfast that morning. And that is why the Manassas, VA City Police is/are malaka/malakas of the week.

One thought on “Malaka Of The Week: Manassas, VA City Police

  1. DuggleBogey says:

    This is the same place John and Lorena Bobbitt were from.
    Not a good penis history from that locale.

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