It’s Carnival time and I’m feeling ho hum. This case of Carnival ennui is unfortunate given that we live inside the parade route box, but what can ya do? I don’t want to be the skunk at the parade party, but if I didn’t live inside the box, I’d skip it all this year. Oh well, what the hell.

Enough kvetching from me. Let’s move on to our theme song.

Gary Louris wrote Haywire for The Jayhawks 1997 album, Sound Of Lies. Sounds like 2026, doesn’t it?

The Jayhawks are based in St. Paul, Minnesota. They issued this statement last week:

Here’s another song called Haywire:

I opted not to make it a co-theme song because its provenance is confusing. Damn, I sound like an appraiser on Antiques Roadshow. Not a bad image since the song was written by Roddy Frame. His provenance is Scottish. Aye, Roddy.

Our second act consists of three pieces by former Washington Post reporters on the slow motion murder of an American institution. Two of them, Sally Jenkins and Ruth Marcus, were WaPo lifers and Ashley Parker planned to be one. They’ve all decamped to magazine world, The Atlantic for Parker and Jenkins and The New Yorker for Marcus. They’re lucky to have them. The Bezos malakatude, it burns.

Ashley Parker: The Murder Of The Washington Post

Ruth Marcus: How Jeff Bezos Brought Down The Washington Post

Sally Jenkins: You Can’t Kill Swagger

The Jenkins piece is about the WaPo’s legendary sports section. It’s gone for good. I’m glad Jenkins was able to quit with dignity instead of being shitcanned by email. That’s right: management didn’t have the decency to face their staff. Fuck them and the MAGA horse they rode in on.

The last word goes to a tune composed by John Philip Sousa in 1889.

I’ve heard that march many times but didn’t know it was named for the WaPo. You learn something new every day.

We begin our second act with our favorite stolen feature.

Separated At Birth Casting Edition: Clifton Webb played John Philip Sosua in the 1952 film Stars and Stripes Forever. I’m posting this quad poster in lieu of side-by-side headshots.

Your Basic Basie:  This time, a Gershwin doubleheader.

Have I told you lately how much I love Count Basie? That goes for Anthony Benedetto as well.

The Best Of SCTV: The great comedic actress Catherine O’Hara died recently at the age of 71. Here she is as Katharine Hepburn.

Classic Movie Trailer: I long ago pledged my troth to Nazi mockery. Ernst Lubitsch did so in 1942 with this brilliant film.

Grading Time: I give To Be Or Not To Be 4 stars and an Adrastos grade of A. It’s a stone cold classic.

Repeat after me: Mockery is the best medicine.

Saturday GIF Horse: I usually loathe remakes. I make an exception for Mel Brooks’ version of  To Be Or Not To Be.

It’s Hitler Rap time, y’all:

Toon Time: I’m not a fan of Politico. I make an exception for Matt Wuerker’s excellent cartoons:

Let’s close down this virtual honky tonk with some more music.

Saturday Closer: Another day, another Tiny Desk Concert. This time, the fine band with a dumb name.

That’s all for this week. The last word goes to Dustin Hoffman, Robert Redford, Jason Robards, Jack Warden, and Martin Balsam in All The President’s Men.