We begin with a brief health update. I’m on the disabled list for Jazz Fest. It’s the first time I’ve missed it since I moved to New Orleans. I can’t do all the walking and standing involved in festing. Wait until next year.

My recovery hasn’t exactly stalled but it has slowed down. It reminds me of charging an iPhone. It’s easy to get to 90% but the last 10% is difficult, My long range prognosis is good, but the short range reality is frustrating. Oh well, what the hell.

Frank Zappa composed this week’s theme song for his 1969 album Hot Rats. It’s a glorious instrumental with a tongue in cheek title. Frank specialized in cheeky titles.

We have two versions of Peaches En Regalia for your listening pleasure: the studio original and the Mothers live without a horn section in 1971.

While we’re on the subject of peaches. Dickey Betts of the Allman Brothers Band died last week at the age of 80. He was an irascible dude who wrote this sunny song for the Eat A Peach album:

That song always makes me smile. Thanks for all the great music, man.

One more Dickey Betts tune. The title was inspired by a tombstone he saw in a cemetery:

In a word: magisterial.

We begin our second act with a story about a variation on my favorite board game.

Woke Scrabble? I play app Scrabble nowadays, but the board game is still out there. The new version, Scrabble Together, is supposedly less competitive and more cooperative. Whatever.

Anything that inspires this sort of reaction from the creeps at Fox can’t be all bad:

Well, that’s it: They made Scrabble woke. Conservative news outlets have been making a meal the past few days of the news that Mattel is introducing “Scrabble Together,” a cooperative variation on the classic word-making game designed to be more “accessible” and “inclusive” for younger players. “Mattel Creates Scrabble Without Scoring for Gen Z,” declared Newsmax. “Scrabble is dumbing itself down for the woke,” Jeanine Pirro proclaimed on Fox News, over a chyron reading “SCRABBLE FOR SNOWFLAKES.” Even the New York Times ran a piece claiming, “Will Classic Scrabble devotees object? You bet”—although the only actual competitive Scrabble player quoted in the piece sees “nothing wrong with allowing non-word people to have more fun with the game.”

Dan Kois has the details at Slate.

Scrabble is so beloved that there’s even this song about it:

Gone To The Dogs? I may be a cat person now, but I grew up with dogs. I still like them: we even have a bag of doggie treats for the neighbor dog. Apparently, not everyone feels that way as I learned from a piece by Bindu Bansinath in The Cut: Why Does Everyone Hate My Dog?

The last word of our second act goes to Squeeze:

We begin our third act with our favorite stolen feature.

Separated At Birth Twitter Edition: This is an obscure one. I don’t do or care about Tik Tok, so I’d never heard of the guy on the left, but the resemblance is there:

Separated at birth? German cabaret artist Bodo Wartke (the Barbaras Rhabarberbar rap guy on Tiktok) and US House Speaker Mike Johnson.

OK not as close as Scholz and Senator Coons, but still. pic.twitter.com/bW4uEMGeZS

— Dr Seán Ketchem (@cskwriter) April 23, 2024

FWIW, I don’t think Maga Mike deserves to be called a hero for belatedly and begrudgingly pushing through aid to Ukraine. It should have happened months ago.

Your Weekly Oscar: I almost took a pass on this tune because it’s Saturday, but went for it because I’m drinking a cup of Joe while writing this post:

That was all Joe Pass on guitar, so let’s throw in a version of Come Sunday by OP and the Riddler:

Have I told you lately how much I love Oscar Peterson?

The Best Of Letterman: Dave always had a prickly relationship with the suits at NBC. Here’s some proof.

Saturday GIF Horse: Speaking of jokes, it’s a GIF featuring the Talented Mr. Santos:

The world gave George Santos the finger long ago, let’s pile on with some Badfinger:

The Junk Drawer: You know things are going poorly for Marge Greene when the Murdoch Post mocks her.

Tweet Of The Week: President Biden is going after his opponent early and often. What’s not to love about Trump bible jokes?

Wow. Biden in Tampa on Trump: "He said there has to be punishment for women exercising their reproductive freedom … maybe it's coming from that bible he's trying to sell. I almost wanted to buy one just to see what the hell is in it." pic.twitter.com/DbBkOI5lWH

— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) April 23, 2024

Let’s close down this virtual honky tonk with some more music.

Saturday Closer: Last week in this space, I posted a tune by Chick Corea & Gary Burton as a palate cleanser to a brief appearance by the dread Joe Rogan. That’s how I discovered this swell set by the duo.

That’s all for this week. The last word of Zappa-Ernst month goes to Max Ernst: