Recipe For Trumpalaya

I’m gratified by the response to my Dining Out With The Clownfish post. I’ve gotten a lot of praise for it on the platform formerly known as Twitter. I’ll be dining out on it for a minute or two. Thanks, y’all.

One reason for the plaudits is the rave review it received from the high panjandrum of Louisiana political pundits, Clancy DuBos:

Cronyism can be a beautiful thing unless it involves David Pecker. It’s unclear if Jeff Landry has any cronies but he *is* a peckerwood…

Readers seem to have enjoyed my Trumpalaya joke. A friend asked if there was a recipe. There was not until now.

For the uninitiated, Trumpalaya is a variation on Jambalaya, which is classic Louisiana festival food. It’s often made in large amounts to feed the masses. Call it populism on a plate.

The ingredients for Trumpalaya are simple: cheap andouille sausage, overcooked chicken, salt, pepper, and cayenne. The secret ingredient is Cheeto dust to evoke the color of the Indicted Impeached Insult Comedian’s mug. Like this beverage, it’s strictly for Trump cultists:

If The Clownfish is in a whimsical mood, he expects his cooks to wear these socks displayed by Gret Stet Lt. Gov Billy Nungesser in this photo montage stolen from The Daily Mail:

Lt. Governors are born sycophants. Bordello Billy should take this Zappa song to heart:

None of that was very appetizing, but neither is Trumpalaya. It typically tastes as if it’s been left outside in the Gret Stet heat too long. It’s guaranteed to make libs retch and Trumpers pledge eternal fealty to the Kaiser of Chaos. Much of Trump’s appeal is down to food poisoning. I *am* making this up.

At Clownfish Restaurant, Trumpalaya is served with word salad and Diet Coke to drink. Former President* Pennywise slathers it with ketchup and keeps the bottle handy in case he needs to throw something in a fit of pique. Ketchup makes a satisfying splatter on the wall.

Is Donald Trump the Jackson Pollock of ketchup tossers? Discuss amongst yourselves.

Word salad is not only served with Trumpalaya, it’s used to describe it since both Trump and Landry have limited vocabularies. Here are a few words that come to mind: Baloney, bluster, bullshit, brutality, and bigotry.

Shorter Adrastos: Trumpalaya B nasty.

Since Trump and Landry dig owning the libs, I thought it was only fair to let a lib own them. The last word goes to John Fogerty:

 

 

One thought on “Recipe For Trumpalaya

Leave a Reply