Your President Speaks!

To the WaPo, yesterday.

The Capability To Be Able Should Not Be Underestimated</p

The reason why is, it is an accurate reflection that this ideological war we’re in is going to last for a while, and that we’re going to need a military that’s capable of being able to sustain our efforts and to help us achieve peace.

Positively Awful</p

There’s been some very positive developments. And you take a step back and look at progress in Iraq, you say, well, it’s amazing — constitutional democracy in the heart of the Middle East, which is a remarkable development in itself.

Drain Bamage</p

So part of my policy review is how do we deal with that in a way that then enables the Iraqi people to live in a more secure society so that the government can prove its worth to the people — saying, we can help you.

Drain Bamage, Noun-Verb Agreement Edition</p

There’s other threats, by the way.

The Point of the Point</p

And we’ve got a very robust effort — I said the other day something that, I guess, people didn’t pay that much attention to — but for October and November and the first week of December, our actions on the ground have — as a result of action on the ground, we killed or captured nearly 5,900 people. My point in making that point is our troops and coalition troops are on the offense in a lot of areas.

Ugh</p

I think the American people — I know the American people are very worried about an external threat and that they recognize that failure in Iraq would embolden that external threat, and they expect this administration to listen with people, to work with Democrats, to work with the military, to work with the Iraqis to put a plan in place that achieves the objective. There’s not a lot of people saying, “Get out now.” Most Americans are saying, “We want to achieve the objective.”

Son Of Ugh</p

I’ve got four constituencies I speak to on a regular basis; one is the American people, who are justifiably frustrated at the progress in Iraq. And they expect the commander in chief and the people in Washington to support our troops. Supporting our troops not only means good equipment, good, good housing — it also means a plan that helps achieve the objective.

It Means Rummy Crapped His Pants</p

The leaders I have talked to wonder whether or not — what the elections mean, or what the Baker-Hamilton commission means, or what changing secretary Rumsfeld means — that’s what they wonder.

Take Risk For Peace!</p

And that’s an important question for them to have answered, because in order to make difficult choices and to take risk for peace, they’re going to have to be assured that they’ll get support.

You’re Nothing Without Me</p

I do want to say something about the press. I hope you realize that, one, I enjoy the relationship, and two, know it is vital for my presidency. You can’t exist without me, and I can’t exist without you.

A Decider And An Adherer</p

I’ve often talked about how it’s important to trust the judgment of the military when they’re making military plans as the key advisers to the president, as opposed to the president determining the tactics on the ground, which has happened in previous wars. And so I’m a strict adherer to the command structure.

I Missed The Sex</p

There was a lot of — look, you’ve got a guy using earmarks to enrich himself; there was sex and all kinds of issues that sent the signal that perhaps it was time to give another group a chance to lead.

Return of Drain Bamage</p

The microphone of the president has never been louder, and I think we have a good — in other words, to talk about what I think is important.

95% Of Americans Are Doing Workers</p

There is a better way to treat people, and there’s a better way to deal with the issue of finding workers Americans are not doing, to fill on a temporary basis. And, therefore, there need — and that in itself will take pressure off our border.

Like A Sheet of Toilet Paper</p

There’s no question the military has been used a lot.

13 thoughts on “Your President Speaks!

  1. I don’t know. You’d think someone in the Bush maladministration would be a tad embarrassed by this sort of thing and try to shut him up. Maybe they do, but he won’t listen.
    The three last quotes are unbelievable.
    Holden you deserve some kind of reward for walking through this shit. Do you wear a protective mask while doing it?

  2. It Means Rummy Crapped His Pants
    thank you for that. boy did i need a laugh this morning.

  3. You can’t exist without me, and I can’t exist without you.
    Uh Oh! Chimpy’s been watching Fatal Attraction again!
    “I WON’T be ignored, Gregory!”

  4. no wonder they call him the ceo president – he sure babbles on like one, without actually saying anything.
    -dan mcenroe

  5. Should Not Be Misunderestimated.
    Are there no dictionaries? Is there no spellcheck?

  6. He’s not my president. Never was. Never will be.
    Can we send him to be the president of Iraq for a while? After all, they love freedom just as much as he does.

  7. Alas, no. Not in the decider and adherer’s head. He’s not programmed for that.

  8. “The microphone of the president has never been louder, and I think we have a good — in other words, to talk about what I think is important.”
    “Cuz, as the president, I personally decidered to turn it up a good 4 or 5…little mark thingies, above where it is usually set.”

  9. “There is a better way to treat people, and there’s a better way to deal with the issue of finding workers Americans are not doing, to fill on a temporary basis. And, therefore, there need — and that in itself will take pressure off our border.”
    See that! Our President just trying to make sure that all workers get fucked.

  10. “Drain Bamage, Noun-Verb Agreement Edition
    There’s other threats, by the way. ”
    (The action going on in the mind of the Decider): Dubya’s Texan personality has his Yalie sissy-boy, cheerleader personality down and is kicking him in the ribs.

  11. Dear fucking lord. I also listened to it, which was worse. In many other countries, he’d be led away.

  12. “There’s” is perfectly good Southernglish and you know it. And it don’t have no tense. Don’t be mean to the Bush Baby.

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