Today On Holden’s Obsession With The Gaggle

As I’m sure you all know by now, President Slurpy McNearbeer awoke feeling woozy today. Short-termerDan Bartlett explains.

MR. BARTLETT: Well, the President woke up this morning and wasn’t feeling very well. He’s not sure if it was something he ate last night, or just — or this morning, for that matter — but not feeling completely up to snuff.


Q How seriously would you characterize what he has right now?

MR. BARTLETT: Not serious. I mean, like I said, just being very — taking a precautionary step by allowing himself to rest and recuperate a bit. Like I said, he was up this morning at about — fully dressed, but kind of was settling in on him about, oh, about a half hour before his meeting with President Sarkozy. And he was — thought it was, out of abundance of caution, to dial it back a bit. And that’s why the meeting took place in the private quarters.

A few hours later, after several aspirin and a bit of the hair of the dog, Boozey McShitfaced is all better.

MR. BARTLETT: The President has just returned to the talks. After having an opportunity to rest, he feels rejuvenated. The suspicion is that it was some sort of bug, probably more viral in nature and highly unlikely to be anything related to food or anything he ate — just think it’s something that may be running through the system. Mrs. Bush, a couple days ago, didn’t feel very well herself; didn’t stop any of her activities.

So most likely that it’s just a bug that he’s managing through. He’s not a hundred percent, but he felt well enough to return to the talks and looks forward to completing the session currently underway, as well as some of the bilats that he was scheduled to have today — you know, pull-asides that were informally arranged.


Q Did the President eat anything unusual in the last 24 hours?

MR. BARTLETT: Doesn’t believe so. And, again, he woke up this morning initially feeling fine.

His “medication” caused the problem in the first place.

Q Is he taking any medication?

MR. BARTLETT: I don’t have the details on that, and we typically don’t disclose the details of the type of medical care the President is receiving.

4 thoughts on “Today On Holden’s Obsession With The Gaggle

  1. The President is recovering from his exercise regimen. He did too many 12 ounce curls last night.

  2. Interesting that Bartlett didn’t deny that Bush was receiving medical care saying “we typically don’t disclose the details of the type of medical care the President is receiving”.

  3. Why were they so careful to assure everyone that it wasn’t anything he ate or drank? Symptoms like they’re describing are often from food.
    Of course, alcoholic gastritis is up there also.

  4. Oh, MapleStreet – notice how they only refer to “ate” and “food” and no inclusion of the word “drank” or “beverage” (or the like)!!! Um, methinks they were trying to head off the obvious tie-in that we have made based on the photographic record…
    Wow, those 30 Bucklers must have hurt! And he probably shouldn’t have tried the blackmarket Zima knock-off… 😉
    He’s such a turdbucket…I canna stand heem!
    Peace out!

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