Column: Haha, McCain


It’s too bad we have all this serious real-life stuff going on, because McCain’s jokes are really something. Did you hear the one about why Chelsea Clinton is so ugly? Because Janet Reno is her father. Hah! Nothing like a sitting U.S. senator picking on an awkward teenager to score some chuckles.

Wait, though, he’s got another one, this one sung to the tune of a Beach Boys song: “Bomb bomb bomb, bomb bomb Iran. …” Isn’t that hilarious? Maybe we could play that over loudspeakers at the Republican National Convention next month. Maybe we could use it as a theme song to actually, you know, bomb Iran, and kill some American soldiers, because that’s what bombing other countries gets us, more often than not. Let’s all have a giggle at how funny war can be.

These are serious times. The campaign rhetoric this summer has been almost entirely a repeat of that in 2004: Democrats want us all to die at the hands of our Islamofascist (no, really) overlords and would surrender the country to Osama bin Laden at the drop of an envelope of anthrax, while Republicans want to smoke ’em out, hang ’em high, get ’em dead or alive. It’s about that coherent. The argument was utterly dishonest the first time around; now it’s just tiresome.


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