Wanting a War

Well, yes:

I don’t think we’re probably
headed for mass secessions or Civil War or anything quite that extreme.
But I do think a lot of the teabaggers, birthers, and sovereign
citizens do genuinely wish that we were.

Because if there’s a war, then they get to dust off all their copies of Soldier of Fortune and their SCA crossbows and shit, and make it all mean something. If there’s a war, they get to finally prove to everyone what they’ve been jawing about for years, that they’re not really Cheeto-dusted losers but hardcore badasses, Elven cloaks and Rings of Power included. It’s like their other recurring dream, that offinally waking up in an episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation, so they can finally show off everything they’ve ever learned that anybody ever told them was a little bit arcane.

The Coming IslamoFascist Struggle was the fantasy for a while, and before that it was Y2K (remember all that fucking goofiness in the megachurches?) and before that … I don’t know, I only started tracking the advanced insanity around the turn of the millennium. But there’s always something coming that will prove them worthy and you wanting. And THEN you’ll be sorry.


10 thoughts on “Wanting a War

  1. they want their permanent republikkklan majority back. they want THEIR ameriKKKa back. they want georgee back. fux told them they were gonna lrd over us FOREVER!

  2. But there’s always something coming that will prove them worthy and you wanting. And THEN you’ll be sorry.
    All just practice for the Rapture.

  3. Elspeth, I own those movies, I have watched those movies 3,000 times, I was raised on The Hobbit. I have yet to come to the conclusion, however, that only in Middle Earth are my skills worthy or some shit. There’s being a fan and then there’s blatant wish fulfillment fantasy.
    who also had a HUGE crush on Patrick Stewart, so I know whereof I mock

  4. I’m an Aragorn girl myself. But I’ll happily take Boromir, Eomer or Faramir while I’m waiting. 😉
    I’m a moderate level fangirl, hell I haven’t even read the books, but the movies were so awesomely done in their production value and detail… I own the cinematic versions and the extended length ones. I have a replica of Strider’s sword, too. And I’ve made the dress that Arwen wears when she goes all mortal – with local climate changes made to fabric choices. And I had opening night ticket to the midnight viewing of the collection of LOTR props/costumes at the Houston Museum of Nat’l Science…the replica of Boromir in the funereal send off boat – so frikkin’ realistic looking (I LOVE Sean Bean – ‘specially as “Sharpe”) I was sorely tempted to hop the plexi barrier! LOL!
    I tend to cringe at full-on Sci Fi conventions – I went to more than my fair share as a kid w/my aunt who is very into them…even at a tender age, those folks were too ‘special’ for me.

  5. Athenae, I always think of this when I read articles about the military viewing global warming as a threat to national security. These people welcome it: they want to build their planes and their ships and their tanks and they want to play war.

  6. I think this misses the bigger picture. These folks are already on a path that will lead them to (and, I fear, us) catastrophe. They want to be part of something meaningful (as do we all), yet the mainstream of American society has made it quite clear that it is not open to them.
    These people seem like the lunatic fringe now, but with a charismatic leader and just the slightest of causes to fight for they will turn into something much more fearsome.
    This is not some small group of teabaggers. This is tens of millions of people who reject utterly the values and goals of the rest of society.

  7. I’ve said it so many times that I almost get sick of ‘hearing’ myself say it. These jackholes pray every night for Doomsday because they know they have no place in a functioning, civilized society.
    Oh, and I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve seen LOTR, Star Wars, Omega Man, currently re-watching the Potter movies, etc. I’m guessing that the fine people who frequent this blog know all too well the difference between real life and occasional much-needed escapism from that life.

  8. The people you’re referring to, A., always fantasize themselves at the top of the post-Apocalyptic heap. The wisdom and strength they possess, ignored now because of the decadence and corruption of our civilization, will cause big-breasted princesses in revealing chainmail to swoon, while strong men weep to hear their sterling pronouncements on matters of grave importance.
    Or at least, that’s the right-wing blogger crowd. The teabagging masses, as Jim Pharo says, are ripe for a fascist takeover that they themselves will promote, to their everlasting harm. All they know is, they’re being used & abused and they’re sick of it and furious. As always happens, though, the people leading them are the ones using & abusing them.
    If Obama’s various measures succeed, even modestly, we may weather the storm. If the obstructionists have their way, we’re looking at a fascist or theocratic coup.

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