A Questionnaire

I am having an abortion because:

A) I’m a selfish whore

B) I’m a selfish whore

C) I’m a selfish whore

That’s basically the upshot of this nonsense:

State Sen. Todd Lamb helped draft the abortion legislation and
describes it as “a common sense measure with bipartisan support.” He
says the left has tried to skew the law’s intent through a campaign of

“We’re not trying to embarrass anybody, hurt anybody
or make anybody’s identities known. That’s not the purpose of the
legislation,” the Republican lawmaker says.

“We want to collect hard data that can be a useful tool in helping prevent future unwanted pregnancies.”

law requires doctors to fill out a 10-page questionnaire for every
abortion performed, including asking the woman about her age, marital
status, race and years of education.

One section of the
“Individual Abortion Form” says the woman must state her reason for
seeking an abortion and answer this checklist. “Having a baby:

• Would dramatically change the life of the mother;
• Would interfere with the education of the mother;
• Would interfere with the job/employment/career of the mother.”

Forget the incredible invasion of privacy this is, or that this is the sort of thing conspicuously NOT being asked of the men who knocked these ladies up and perhaps in some cases have contributed either financially or emotionally to the woman’s decision to have an abortion (through presence or absence of support). Forget all that.

What possible use could any of this information be to anyone? I mean, ideally, sure, there would be a use for such data, were the Republican Party of Oklahoma not FUCKING INSANE. Is there, based on this survey info, going to be a statewide initiative to provide, say, increased educational or job opportunities for new parents based on who says what here? Like 30 percent of the selfish whores who kill their unborn say they’re doing it because having a kid makes them basically unemployable, is Oklahoma then gonna turn around and offer free day care throughout the state to any unmarried mother?

Somehow I doubt it. Which means this is just about finding ways to shame poor women and frightened young girls for being so horrible as to think about their job prospects (so impractical to consider employment when planning a family!) or their education (because middle-school dropouts always totally win at life!) at all in the context of their pregnancies. This is just about being able to say in TV ads that women are selfish bitches and should have thought of these things before they opened their legs.

As per usual. Using this data to prevent unwanted pregnancies? You know what would
prevent the fuck out of unwanted pregnancies and not require any survey
data at all? CONDOMS. In every frigging Happy Meal.


13 thoughts on “A Questionnaire

  1. “Common sense measure?”
    I’m so sick of this shit. It makes my head explode.
    Ok, here’s my compromise, fuckwad. Make the doctor fill out a similar survey before they can dispense any dick hardener medication. I want it laid out, how the inability to have a boner is going to negatively impact the life of the patient. I’m sure that information will be useful in trying to prevent some mental health or save some marriages or something, so those guys won’t mind having to go through that exercise or having the information saved.

  2. I know this is a dumb question, but what steps did the good Senator take to validate the survey?

  3. 1. To keep up with the Congressional pages.
    2. To practice their “wide stance.”
    3. For hiking the old “Appalachian Trail”.

  4. I still say every anti-abortion advocate should sign up to be aan organ donor. Giving organs saves lives too. Now when they refuse to donate a kidney or liver lobe they should have the same questionaire.

  5. You know what? The Oklahoma Senate’s questionnaire is unconstitutional. It provides for legalized discrimination. (they don’t get the fathers in to fill it out independently, do they? yeah, thought not.)

  6. And since it has to be filled out by the doctor (or an aide) and then get filed, and then the doctor has to answer questions about it later, that’s another half hour per procedure that the overworked, death-threat-burdened folks at clinics and hospitals can’t spend actually, y’know, saving women’s lives and health.

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