Here’s the thing. Lots of people will say Breitbart is exactly what ABC wanted, a psycho conservative who could talk about how psycho conservatives were taking over the country in a wave of conservative psychoticness. And that it makes a certain kind of twisted sense if what you need is to understand why our country is the way it is, I mean, who better to explain our insanity to us than the person who’s invested a lot of time in making us crazy?
But I don’t believe they thought about it that hard. I think they’re lazy as fuck and they called a guy who “makes news” and who “draws attention” and who would “invigorate the debate” and all the other things idiot newsmonkeys say when they hire creeps, perverts, loonballs and others who you would imagine would be unfit for polite society. Because it’s easy. Because it gets them and their coverage attention. Because he’s been covered by others, and there is no better way to get coverage than to be covered in the first place, like how when you graduate college nobody will hire you until somebody else does. Because they had a hole to fill and his head fit. Because his web traffic’s better than theirs. I think it was attention-whoring, plain and simple, and that’s what we do now, in the political press and the press in general: We try to get attention. It’s why the theme songs for various shows are so fucking loud.
Five years later, we laughed the same, bitter laugh as the Mainstream Media began predictably and endlessly fetishizing as Fresh!And!New! a Teabagger Movement which had clearly been fabricated almost entirely out of the body-parts of old Republicans, and reanimated by the same radical Right wing billionaire industrialists who have bankrolled every other Republican crackpot power-grab for the last 50 years.
If we are, at times, a trifle pedantic it is because this is the basal level understanding of the Right we on the Left have carried around in our heads for a long, long time.
Because after six years, two failed wars and a smashed global economy later we on the Left are watching exactly the same coalition of intractably ignorant bedwetters, religious bigots and racist yahoos who are still freebasing exactly the same toxic witchbag of Hate Radio and Fox News lies, slander and fake patriotism about to march into the same exactly the same polling places to double down on their democracy-killing insanity and prove once again how proudly impervious to facts and reason they really are.
Except this time they’re wearing tri-corner hats, and every one them will swear on a stack of “Don’t Tread On Me” flags that they never even fucking heard of George W. Bush.
Any kind of memory at all, either of what Breitbart actually does and did, or of what the Tea Party people actually are and do, and of the direct line between Nixon’s bagmen and the smearing and ratfucking they did and the kind of nonsense Republicans pull today, is a detriment when your whole job is to get on board whatever horse presents itself at your doorway that morning and ride that bitch until somebody turns off the lights at night. They’re not thinking about what the Tea Party actually means. They’re just trying to get to tomorrow and have people still paying attention. They’re shallow and lazy and their primary interest is not in educating people, it’s repeating buzzwords and talking about page views.
Ergo, Breitbart. Because they didn’t actually think about it. They just grabbed him and stuffed him into a spot. As usual, I don’t hate him half as much as all the people who ask how high when he even thinks about asking them to jump.