Malaka Of The Week: Scott Brown

Dear MSM:

Please stop telling us that Mass. Senator Scott Brown is a mainstream moderate when he’s really a main street malaka. His campaign reminds Joan Walsh of Jesse Helms in 1984. A pretty darn good analogy since that was a despicable campaign run by an odious candidate against an honorable and decent one. It reminds me more of Poppy Bush’s endlessly trivial and loathsome campaign against my hapless countryman, Michael Dukakis. The good news is that Elizabeth Warren is no Dukakis and that it’s 2012, not 1984. Here’s hoping that it’s the last gasp of Helmsville, Thurmondia and Nixonland…

I assume you know what I’m talking about but let me back track and describe it a bit more fully Senator Beefcake’s malakatude. (Btw, I’m living up to our blog’s name and motto and letting it rip. Watch out:anything can happen.) It’s the whole “she don’t look like no Injun to me” thing. It’s pure Nixonian bile and bigotry, and straight out of Bush 41’s pursuit of trivia campaign. I halfway expect to see Willie Horton and the Pledge of Allegiance evoked on the trail as Brown squawks about the, uh, squaw. No, he hasn’t called her that. YET. Hey, at least he’ll be “respectful” and call her Perfesser…

The thing that really set me off was the video of Brown’s staffers doing the tomahawk chop whilst publicly mocking Ms. Warren. My Florida State Seminole fan buddies, Christy and Cait, are outraged at this appropriation of their fangirl silliness by stupid yankee frat boys. Sorry, y’all, I couldn’t help slipping that in. Anyhoo, here are some bozos on the public payroll acting stupid in public:

Hey, at least the Warren and Brown folks agree that the Yankees suck as do I. Anyone up for a rousing chant of Dodgers suck?Go, Giants but I digress. Time to start a new paragraph.

Brown’s fixation on the “Indian heritage” story is ludicrous. I take Ms. Warren at her word that it was a family story and she never checked it out. There are a few stories like that in my own family. My father insisted that my mother was related to Fighting Bob LaFollette and she neither confirmed not denied it. I checked on the internets and it wasn’t so. Guess that disqualifies me from running for the Senate against some lame ass douchebag in a borrowed pickup truck…

Josh Marshall has had a good time mocking Brown’s presumption that he knows an Native American when he sees one or is that the only good one is… Never mind, we’ll skip Gen. Sheridan…

The current President of the Cherokee Nation is not amused by Brown’s bold-n-barefaced malakatude. Bill John Baker has asked Brown to shut the fuck up and channel Richard Harris in A Man Called Horse or even Billy Jack. Please forgive the Joe Don Baker joke, Mr. President, but sometimes I cannot help myself.

I think Scott Brown and his sub-moronic frat boy staffers should be obliged to listen to Indian Reservation (Cherokee People)by Paul Revere and the Raiders on their iPods with the volume cranked up until their hearing is as bad as mine or Pete Townshend’s. Now where the hell did I put my trumpet horn hearing aid? Btw, I like the tune, the torture lies in listening to it on ear buds at Metallica concert level volume. Then, Senator Malaka and his idiot staffers can stick the ear buds up their asses. Ah, that felt good, even that epic thesis sentence. I promise never to do that again…

Anyway, I guess I made my point with this rant. It sure felt fucking good to go the whole Adrastos of a Wednesday evening.

Finally, fuck you, Senator Malaka and your insipidly anti-intellectual campaign. The good news is that the head of the GOP ticket is 26 points behind in Mass. Fuck you sideways, Scotty, boyo, the Mittbot is takin’ you down…

3 thoughts on “Malaka Of The Week: Scott Brown

  1. By Brown’s “definition,” Bill Don Baker might be a little too, um, pale-faced as well.
    He’s really bottom feeding on this one.

  2. Well, aren’t Injuns dark skinned? Dopn’t you see the similarity to Mooslims?
    And, in all seriousness, there has been a long line of protests against appropriation of the Indian Tomahawk Chop – for example see the Atlanta Braves.
    But when are they at least gonna realize that the Hollywood Indian portrayal is both inaccurate for all, but even more is based on those from the plains. When are they gonna realize that these are vast differences??? For starters, living in swampland in Florida, hunting buffalo from horseback just wasn’t practical.
    And maybe then they could figure out that the tomahawk chop is just as insulting as “no tickee, no shirtee” (well except the repubs still think that is a riot as well as sticking chopsticks up their nose and barking like a walrus. )

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