This is a tale of two Republicans who are in the news today. The first is the La Pasionaria of the teanut set, Michelle Bachmann. As we all know, t he crazy eyed wackadoodle from the sensible state of Minnesota isn’t running for re-election. She *claims* it has nothing to do with the ethics charges swirling about her goofball campaign for President, but that she’s suddenly for term limits, which she used to be against. And now she’s self limiting her term or some such nonsense. Of course, no one should believe a word that comes out of the Bachmann bazoo. She’s not running because it would be too hard. Sound familiar?
Establishment GOPers are heaving a sigh of relief over Bachmann’s exit-for now-from center stage. That brings me to the second Republican in the news this week. It’s an unlikely one: Bob Dole former Senate Republican leader, 1976 Veep nominee, 3 time GOP candidate for President ,and the party’s 1996 nominee. In a sane world, Bob Dole would be regarded as a mainstream conservative. But in the fun house/loony bin that is the GOP in 2013, he’s a squishy, moderate RINO as far as the teawads are concerned.Ted Cruz, Mike Lee, Senator Aqua Buddha and the wacko bird caucus don’t like Bob Dole and that’s fine with Bob Dole.
That’s right, sports fans, this is the same Bob Dole who served as a hatchet man for Tricky Dick and his hapless successor, Jerry Ford. The same Bob Dole who called World War II a “Democrat war,” and always referred to himself in the third person. That Bob Dole. It shows what the GOP has come to when a politician who was moderate on a few issues in his time-food stamps, the Americans with Disabilities Act-now looks halfway decent because he wasn’t barking mad.The good news is that the wingnuts will not listen to Bob Dole telling them what Bob Dole would do if Bob Dole were running the show. That’s because Bob Dole is a squish, which makes St Ronnie one as well since he signed <shudder> a librul abortion law in California before discovering the sanctity of life,
While I’m not a Chris Christie fan, I would love to see him run a scorched earth anti-wingnut campaign in 2016. The lunacy of the current Republican party is doing untold damage to our political system because today’s GOPers have no interest in getting shit done. And while I’m a liberal Democrat, I also belong to the party of get-shit-doners, and I’ve had a bellyful of filibusters, ideological purity and the inmates running the political asylum.
Things are bad when I find myself nostalgic for Bob Dole. Really bad. I won’t have to miss having Michelle Bachmann to kick around because I’m pretty sure she’ll turn up spewing nonsense on Fox News and in the wingnut-o-sphere. Charlie Pierce calls her The Girl With Faraway Eyes after the Stones song from Some Girls, so I’ll let Mick, Keith, Woody and the gang have the last word: