A new name for the Republican Party?

The deranged GOP majority in the House of Representatives has decided to torpedo immigration reform. They’ve decided that they don’t need any minority voters because they tend to represent lilly white districts that have been Gerrymandered to keep “those people” out. I’m not sure that they’ve considered the impact on moderate, white suburban voters who aren’t into bigotry. Of course, many of those swing voters have vaginas so the teabaggers only want them if they’re “pro-life.”

On to the post title. I like to be helpful and I think it may be time for the GOP to change its name to something more accurate. Here are a few suggestions:

The Neo-Know Nothings. The original anti-immigrant party ran former President Millard Fillmore so you know they were awesome. Great name, terrible President.

The Neo-Confederate Party: This has a nice ring to it and is accurate since the solid South is the GOP’s base. It would also make Senator Aqua Buddha and his crazy father feel right at home…

The White People’s Party. It could lure David Dukkke back into the party but maybe they don’t want to do that. Maybe. The Jim Crow party is along the same lines but it sounds a bit too much like Bourbon for the religious right to groove on.

Okay, I’ve kidded around, here’s my *real* suggestion:

The Me Party. Current Republican doctrine, such as it is, is all about “self reliance” and keeping your boot on the head of the guy below you so that he or she cannot rise. They’re essentially narcissistic nihilists but those words are too big for the base so the Me Party will have to do.

Anyone else wanna play?

7 thoughts on “A new name for the Republican Party?

  1. azportsider says:

    I’ve long favored the ring of DESPICABLE ASSHOLES.
    And, MichaelF, you ought to call them what they are: an organized crime syndicate.

    Like

  2. sad says:

    Um…
    The Illiberal party?

    Like

  3. MichaelF says:

    Don’t know about changing the name, but how about calling it a cult — or a sect — instead of a party?

    Like

  4. Snarki, child of Loki says:

    Party of God. In arabic: Hezbollah.
    Perhaps I’m just hopeful, but “neo-Whigs”.

    Like

  5. Gummo says:

    No, but I can suggest some snappy slogans:
    FORWARD INTO THE 18TH CENTURY!
    I’VE GOT MINE, FUCK YOU
    APARTHEID WORKS! (JUST ASK SOUTH AFRICA)
    FAITH OVER FACTS
    CORPORATIONS AREN’T JUST PEOPLE; THEY’RE THE ONLY PEOPLE
    WE CREATE OUR OWN REALITY
    DEMOCRACY FOR ME AND MY FRIENDS
    NO COMPROMISE, NO SOCIETY, NO FUTURE

    Like

  6. justsomeguy says:

    The party of fear and hate.

    Like

  7. Tommy T says:

    “The church of Scientology”.
    Tommy

    Like

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