Dickless in Alabama?

I am obviously a horrible human being for finding this story so hilarious:

An attorney for two Alabama doctors accused in a lawsuit of amputating a man's penis in what was supposed to have been a routine circumcision filed a motion Tuesday seeking to dismiss the claims.

Attorney Mike Florie says his clients, Dr. Michael Bivins and Dr. Alan Aikens, never performed a circumcision on Johnny Lee Banks Jr. that involved the removal of tissue or the amputation of the man's penis. He said the suit's claims are false.

Banks' attorney, John Graves, filed the lawsuit on July 22, accusing the doctors and their medical groups of malpractice, negligence and other wrongdoing. It seeks an unspecified amount of money.

Graves says he stands firmly by the allegations but would not comment on specifics of the case.

Earlier this month, Will Axon, a lawyer defending the two doctors, said "When the facts become known this will be seen as an unfair attempt to damage the reputations of dedicated physicians and their outstanding clinics with sensational claims that are completely false," said Axon.

Axon declined to answer questions about specifics in the suit, including whether the man had a penis when he left the hospital.

Admit it, this is a funny story in an evil way. I hope it doesn't make me a schmuck or putz for finding it so perversely amusing. It should be easy to prove or disprove, all the plaintiff has to do is drop trou…

If I had more oomph, I'd write new lyrics to the state song/license plate slogan but I don't, so I won't:


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