Torches and Pitchforks are Coming

Picture what would happen if this was a bunch of African-American kids in a parking lot, not a bunch of white assholes on boats: 

While it’s not entirely accurate to say lawlessness reigns out on this stretch of water, the magnitude of the Chicago Scene Boat Party and the free flow of people inhibit authorities’ interference, according to a Chicago police officer who used to frequent the Playpen and was hired as security for Boat Scene. “They try and control it, but by the time it gets to that size it’s just so difficult because of the nature of the setup. You have one or two police boats. Everybody’s drinking. What do you enforce? It’s a good party, but how do you control it? It’s really hard.”

Hovering on the outskirts of the Playpen, teams from the Chicago Police Department’s marine unit, the Fire Department’s marine rescue, and the U.S. Coast Guard seem to be playing it cool. If they aren’t exactly looking the other way, they also aren’t making any noticeable effort to break up anyone’s fun. Which is good, because some of these boats are veritable floating pharmacies.

“If you want weed, you can get weed. You want coke, you can get coke. You want Molly, you can get Molly. You can get anything as long as you’re tied to the right line,” says a CPS teacher finishing a crawl down one of the Boat Scene’s many chains.

“There was some guy from Hawaii, and he had all this crazy weed with red tips,” the teacher’s wide-eyed friend gushes. “He handed me a giant bud, like, ‘Here.’ And I don’t even smoke.”

The entire story (and attendant bitchy comments along the lines of UR JUS JELLUS from partiers) just reeks of casus class belli, though to be honest I’m more interested in the idea that law enforcement can’t figure out what to enforce. It’s right there in your name, guys. Pretty sure selling drugs on the open water isn’t, you know, okay.

Or if it is, it’s okay for everybody, and we need to open up a few prison cells and let some guys who weren’t lucky enough to have a yacht under them while holding out into the world again.


2 thoughts on “Torches and Pitchforks are Coming

  1. I was reminded of this sort of thing when BillO said that in “ghettos” it was “expected” that children smoke weed. I thought we called them prep schools, but who knows what the lingo is these days.

  2. I can’t believe this garbage. Gimme some context here . . Because the wealthy assholes do this in most of our little lakes hereabouts, DNR or local police do jump their ass and, y’know, enforce.

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