I have fond memories of watching game shows with my mother. She was a bridge grand master who couldn’t get enough of game shows, highbrow or lowbrow it didn’t matter. She enjoyed watching others compete and even enjoyed the smutty jokes made by Paul Lynde on The Hollywood Squares and Charles Nelson Reilly on The Match Game.

Another game show we watched together was Name That Tune. I haven’t seen the 21st Century reboot but I dug its earlier iteration.

As more and more Republicans have denounced Donald Trump, I’ve pondered how to do a pop quiz about their comments. Then it struck me, Name That Republican.

You’ve surely noticed my use of old movie comedians as featured images for my campaign posts. This time, I’ve left Harold Lloyd hanging and Buster Keaton in the projection booth and gone with Stan Laurel and Oliver Hardy in The Music Box.

Some of the quotes come from the brand new comprehensive NYT quote collection. Some quotes lurked in my memory and others were googled.

Not all the answers are plausible but that’s okay, neither was a Trump presidency until it happened.

It’s time for NAME THAT REPUBLICAN:

1. “We need to acknowledge he let us down. He went down a path he shouldn’t have, and we shouldn’t have followed him, and we shouldn’t have listened to him. And we can’t let that ever happen again. ”

A. Liz Cheney

B. Cassidy Hutchinson

C. Alyssa Farah Griffin

D. Nikki Haley

E. Adam Kinzinger

2. “I saw him when the cameras were off, behind closed doors. Trump mocks his supporters. He calls them basement dwellers.”

A. Stephanie Grisham

B. George Conway

C. Omarosa

D. Sarah Matthews

E. The Mooch

3. “He is a con artist. He runs on this idea he is fighting for the little guy, but he has spent his entire career sticking it to the little guy.”

A. Jeb Bush

B. Carly Fiorina

C. Marco Rubio

D. John Kasich

E. Chris Christie

4. “Donald Trump, who would attack civil rights icons and professional athletes, who would go after grieving Black widows, who would say there were good people on both sides, who endorsed an accused child molester; Donald Trump, and his decisions and his behavior, was harming the country. I could no longer be a part of this madness.”

A. Mark Robinson

B. Kanye West

C. Tim Scott

D. OJ Simpson

E. Omarosa

5. “Facts are blunt instruments, and a mountain of facts demonstrates that Trump is unfit to be president. In particular, he has no political philosophy, and does not have ‘policies’ as conventionally understood. Searching for policy coherence is fruitless, since he cares almost exclusively about his own interests, and refuses to take responsibility for decisions he makes that go awry.”

A. Bob Corker

B.  Jeff Flake

C.  Marge Green

D. John Bolton

E. Rex Tillerson

6.“Trump is a race-baiting, xenophobic, religious bigot. He doesn’t represent my party.”

A. Stuart Stevens

B. Sarah Longwell

C. Tim Miller

D. Charlie Sykes

E. Lindsey Graham

7.  “I’m gonna tell you what I really think of Donald Trump: This man is a pathological liar. He doesn’t know the difference between truth and lies. He lies practically every word that comes out of his mouth, and in a pattern that I think is straight out of a psychology textbook, his response is to accuse everybody else of lying.”

A. Bill Kristol

B. Ted Cruz

C. Liz Cheney

D. John Kasich

E.  David Pecker

8.  “Coward. Complete and total coward, a yellow streak so far down his back.”

A. Chris Christie

B.  Ted Cruz

C. George Conway

D. Enrique Tarrio

E. Elmer Stewart Rhodes

9.  “Think of Donald Trump’s personal qualities, the bullying, the greed, the showing off, the misogyny, the absurd third grade theatrics.”

A. Mitch McConnell

B.  KMAC

C. Mitt Romney

D. Steve Garvey

E. Lauren Boebert

10. “I think he’s unfit for office. He puts himself before country. His actions are all about him and not about the country. And then, of course, I believe he has integrity and character issues as well.”

A. Miles Taylor aka Anonymous

B.  Cassidy Hutchinson

C. Olivia Troye

D. Mike Pence

E. Mark Esper

QUIZ ANSWER KEY:

1D: Nikki Haley. She endorsed him anyway. She hopes to pick up the pieces after Trump loses.

2A:  Stephanie Grisham. The only White House press secretary to never hold a press briefing. I am not making this up

3C:  Marco Rubio. Sold out to Trump. He even wanted to be his running mate in 2024.

4E: Omarosa. Apprentice villain bit the hand that fed her when she quit.

5D: John Bolton. The mustache of war thinks Trump is a moron. Plans to vote for Beetle Bailey or some such shit.

6E: Lindsey Graham. Say no more.

7B: Ted Cruz. He’s running for reelection. Let’s hope Colin Allred feeds him a can of whoop-ass.

8A: Chris Christie. He’s still an asshole in my book.

9C: Mitt Romney. Remains equivocal on voting. My hunch is that he’s voting for Brigham Young or some such shit.

10E:  Mark Esper. Trump’s former defense secretary is made of sterner stuff than most GOP pols. He supports Kamala. Any of the other former Trump associates listed could have said likewise.

That concludes this episode of Name That Republican. It’s likely to be a one-off. Pop quizzes are a lot of work but help me stay fresh after blogging for going on 20 years.

The last word goes to the Mountain Goats: