Last week I admitted that I wasn’t an expert on Canadian politics but I’m better versed in them than in Australian politics. The Australian general election was background noise for me this time around but it turned out well: as in Canada, MAGA style populism and the Trump tariffs were major factors in the defeat of the right-wing Coalition. Thanks, Donald.
Prime Minister Anthony Albanese was once considered too far left to lead the ALP (Australian Labor Party) to victory. He’s now done it twice in a row. He’s the first Australian PM to win reelection since John Howard in 2004. More importantly, he’s the first Labor Prime Minister in eons not to face a coup attempt from his caucus. Such hijinks devastated the Rudd-Gilliard-Rudd Labor government of 2007-2013 opening the door for a return of the right.
Albanese is a temperate leader not given to performative theatrics. He’s just what the doctor ordered for Australia after the pandemic. His demeanor has proven more important to voters than his ideology, which remains devoutly progressive.
In contrast to the calm prime minister, coalition candidate Peter Dutton ran hot during the campaign. He adopted some Trumpy rhetoric and policies whereas Albanese left the Trump bashing to surrogates. It went poorly for Dutton: He lost his seat of 24 years as well as the chance to serve as Prime Minster. In this election, the nice guy beat the asshole.
Are Dutton and MAGA Gestapo guy Tom Homan the same dude? They both have faces like clenched fists, after all.
Running even hotter during the Coalition’s shambolic campaign was Senator Jacinta Price who was to be in charge of some DOGE-style rathfuckery if they won. She took the Trumpiness too far by stealing his slogan: Make Australia Great Again. I only steal from the best, but Senator Price stole from the worst. She tried to distance herself from her stolen slogan, then this picture of Price and her husband went viral:
Oops.
Who the hell wants a Trump ornament on their Christmas tree?
Albanese’s victory proves yet again that standing up to the Kaiser of Chaos is the only way to handle him. Appeasement never works.
Repeat after me: Not everything sucks. Fuck yeah, Anthony Albanese.
The last word goes to Steve Howe: