18 Votes

Look. To the 18 of you who seem to think that “damned homos cost us the election,” please:

Let me say this nice and slow. True, hardcore, “protect my marriage,” anti-gay bigots will never vote for a Democrat. Ever. The Republicans have been way too good at casting us as the party of anal sex. While there may be people who vote for us who are uncomfortable at the idea of gay sexing but who nevertheless understand that stopping boys from kissing doesn’t give you a job nor your kids a college education, on the whole, people who recoil in horror at the idea of two women living together in love aren’t gonna cast their ballots for Democrats, no matter how boldly our candidates walk this particular tightrope.

And honestly, it’s time to stop dancing around it, giving half-assed comments about what marriage truly is (like anybody should be able to define that for anybody else) instead of talking about what society is willing to financially reward (which is the issue, really, tax breaks and fee reductions). It’s time to stop being afraid of our own shadows on this issue and start picking up the chair.

“It cost us elections.” No, not really. What costs us elections is the endemic Democratic disease of being afraid to call out large swaths of the public on their support of a guy who is, on a daily basis, fucking them six ways from Sunday. We like to chip away at little constituencies, a few votes here, a few votes there, because this country is thought to be so closely divided. What costs us elections is our tentativeness, on all things, our unwillingness to say “Hey. You. ALL of you. Americans. That’s right, bitches, listen up.” If we lost on this issue it’s only because we let them make this the issue, let them appeal to bigotry and fear and make us “respond” yet again to the agenda they’re setting, and I for one am tired of trying to win a game when the rules are written by our rivals.

It’s time to start saying, “Why are we on the same side as Iran with this issue? I don’t see how they can hate our freedom when we aren’t giving our citizens much more freedom, not on this at least.” It’s time to start saying, “In the history of this great nation we have always advanced boldly toward greater freedom for ourselves. We should not back away now.” And it’s time to start saying, “Oh, for god’s sakes, what are you afraid of anyway? No self-respecting mammal wants to hit on you, Sam Brownback, much less a gay guy. Shut the fuck up and explain why this war’s such a mess, huh? Haven’t you got better things to do than poke your puritanical nose into other people’s bedrooms? Can we talk about why people are still starving in this country, why people have to pay for health insurance while their bosses can write off million-dollar bonuses and travel expenses, why all y’all are so fixated on penises anyway? What is wrong with you? Get laid, wouldja please, and stop bothering everybody else by making them think about what their neighbors are doing in bed.”

And if all else fails, here’s a radical thought: change the subject. Why is it we let them start all the conversations and then worry about what our reply is going to be? They’ve got a lot to answer for, and plenty of people who should be asking them questions are still too busy blaming each other who for who lost the last fight instead of looking up at the fist coming straight for their faces.