Zombie Joke

“The First George W.” — the stupid one-liner that will not die.

January 9, 2004
President Bush Addresses Members of His Team
DAR Constitution Hall
Washington, D.C.

The first George W. hangs over the fireplace. That would be your George Washington.

May 20, 2005
National Catholic Prayer Breakfast
Washington Hilton Hotel
Washington, D.C.

The Catholic contribution to American freedom goes back to the founding of our country. In 1790, a newly inaugurated George Washington — the first George W. — addressed a letter to all Catholics in America.

September 14, 2005
National Dinner Celebrating Jewish Life in America
National Building Museum
Washington, D.C.

Back in 1790, the Jewish congregation of Newport, Rhode Island, wrote to congratulate George Washington on his election as the country’s first President. Some say he was the first George W.

October 28, 2005
President Discusses War on Terror
Norfolk, Virginia

This part of the country was home to the first English-speaking colony on the continent, birthplace of representative government in America, and the site of George Washington’s victory in the Revolutionary War. I call him the first George W.

May 4, 2006
National Day of Prayer
White House

During the darkest days of the Revolutionary War, the Continental Congress and George Washington — I call him the first George W. — urged citizens to pray and to give thanks and to ask for God’s protection.

May 25, 2006
Change of Command Ceremony for the Commandant of the United States Coast Guard
Fort Lesley J. McNair
Washington, D.C.

The history of the Coast Guard dates back more than two centuries, to the Revenue Cutter Service, established by Alexander Hamilton during the presidency of George Washington. Or as I call him, the first George W.

February 19, 2007
President Washington’s 275th Birthday
Mount Vernon, Virginia

Thank you all for coming. Laura and I are honored to be with you in this historic place, on this special anniversary. I feel right at home here. After all, this is the home of the first George W.

March 7, 2007
President Bush Addresses Members of His Team
DAR Constitution Hall
Washington, D.C.

Speaking about history, on the walls there is a portrait of George Washington, so I’m looking at him all the time. George W., the first George W.

March 16, 2007
President Bush and Prime Minister Bertie Ahern of Ireland Participate in Shamrock Ceremony
White House

In 1783, President George Washington — I refer to him as the first George W. — wrote to recent Irish immigrants in New York that “America is open to receive the oppressed and persecuted of all nations,” and he expressed his wish that the blessings of equal liberty and unrestrained commerce would one day prevail in Ireland.

May 11, 2007
Military Spouse Day
White House

Each of you is part of a legacy of service that harkens back to our country’s earliest days. When Martha Washington — the husband [sic] of the first George W. — organized sick wards for wounded soldiers and made visits to battlefields to boost the morale of the troops, she volunteered for a cause bigger than herself.

6 thoughts on “Zombie Joke

  1. Iwonder says:

    What a dumbass. Its more like Curious George was the first George W. and Rove is the man in the yellow hat.

  2. tena says:

    Well Holden – remember? He read a book. It’s probably the only book he’s ever read – that biography of Washington.
    No wonder he uses it over and over. He also thinks he’s just as important since he has the same name. That’s how he thinks, as far as I can tell.

  3. pansypoo says:

    so proud of himself. for doing nothing but having a name.

  4. Elspeth R says:

    I think I am going to vomit now…the painful lack of cognitive thought processes, the lack of proper speech capabilities, the on the fly lame verbal edits, the lust for power/money and causing unnecessary death of our citizens here and abroad, the Oedipus issues, the delight in the unnecessary deaths of the Iraqi civilians…the wanton destruction and the no-bid contracts – and DON’T even get me started on the lack of response/denial of the 10% match waiver…
    If he were a bowling alley, I would have hit the ‘RESET’ button already – his pinsetter is stuck at nonfunctional…
    Cue regurgitation in 3…2…1…
    Elspeth

  5. anonymouse69 says:

    As long as he’s the LAST “G.W.”

  6. “..and the portrait of the first George W. is right here, over the rug. It’s an interesting thing about this rug…”

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