Let’s show these prehistoric Massholes how we do things in Debris Town

After deciding to close and sell a number of churches in recent years,
the Roman Catholic Archdiocese of Boston is now being held hostage.
Parishioners in five of its closed churches are … refusing to leave!
That’s right, they’ve decided to “occupy” some of the closed churches
to prevent the Archdiocese from selling their longtime places of
worship. Impudent scum! Don’t they understand that these properties
need to be liquidated to help pay for recent, ahem, legal settlements?
Do they think the Catholic Church is made of money?

Afront page article in today’s New York Times describes the scene as a “Quiet Rebellion”.

1,533 days, the group at St. Frances has taken turns guarding the
building around the clock so that the archdiocese cannot lock them out
and put it up for sale. They call it a vigil, but by now it is more of
a lifestyle.

So what is the Archdiocese’s response to these pesky squatters?

archdiocese will not provide priests to most of the vigil churches, and
it has removed most statues, altar cloths and sacred objects. It
changed the locks at St. Frances in October 2004 but unwittingly left a
fire door open, an error the parishioners call a miracle.

The archdiocese has not tried to evict the parishioners or shut off the heat and electricity.

haven’t tried to shut off the heat? Why the hell not? You can’t wage
spiritual warfare with wimpy half-measures. Where’s that old tyme
religious spirit? Cut the juice and turn those pews into human ice

Many of the St. Frances holdouts describe
being transformed from passive Catholics to passionate, deeply involved
members of a spiritual community that they say could be a model for the
future of the troubled Catholic Church.

Clearly, this rebellion is headed down a very disturbing path.

St. Frances has no priest, parishioners lead services that include
everything but consecration of the host. On the Sunday before
Christmas, about 50 parishionersattended a service conducted entirely
by women
, including two who distributed communion.

women? What an abomination! You can’t take the “homme” out of the
homily without incurring the wrath of the Almighty… Torquemada their asses!

“The [vigils] can’t go on for
infinity,” said Terrence C. Donilon, a spokesman for the archdiocese.
“These [vigils] have to end at some point, but how, I don’t know.”

You don’t…know?
Really? These rebels have been occupying your property for over 200
weeks and you still don’t know how to end it? (Or is it that you
“know”, but don’t have the will to do it?)

In any event, let the Crescent City show you how tosweep the riff-raff out of God’s house.

Orleans police evicted parishioners from two Uptown Catholic churches
Tuesday, allowing the Archdiocese of New Orleans to reclaim the
churches which parishioners had occupied around the clock for almost 10

Police were instructed to arrest occupiers if they
resisted, with Archbishop Alfred Hughes deciding “It’s time to bring
this to a close”

Now that’s leadership! I’m sure the Godhead is looking down on this, most pleased.

and church officials had to force their way into Good Counsel [Church],
sawing an opening in a side door… novelistPoppy Brite and Hunter
Harris Sr. were led out of the church in handcuffs and placed in a
police squad car.

Throw the book at them!

[A]nother Good Counsel parishioner, Harold Baquet… also was removed in handcuffs and placed in a waiting squad car.

Baquet said he climbed out onto the church’s roof to escape notice, but police found him there.

rooftop manhunt? Awesome. I can think of no better way to celebrate the
Feast of the Epiphany. The Archdiocese of New Orleans is comprised of
very, very wise men. And they know how to take action. They even got
the police to saw down a 100 year old church door during their search and

similar scene occurred at St. Henry’s Church, literally right next door
to my daughter’s school. While I’m glad my daughter was able to witness
this historic eviction first hand, I only wish she could’ve seen the
police drive over a protester’s foot (as they did at Good Counsel) and
heard the subsequent wailing. When Religious Leaders and law
enforcementcoordinate their efforts, shit gets done! That’s a lesson
my daughter can cherish for life. (New Orleanian of the Year, Karen “Gadfly” Gadbois can be seen in the backgroundmaking trouble with a camera at the 1:11 mark in the vid.)

Again, the spokesman for the Boston Archdiocese said hedidn’t know how to end the occupation
of the closed churches. The solution is obvious. Getarmed cops to sweep
them out. Have them crack some skulls to send a message to other rogue parishes, God willing.

I’m reminded of the great theologian Ralph Wiggum, who oncesaid
“The rat symbolizes obviousness.” I don’t know what he was referring
to, precisely, but in this case we know who the rats are, and we know
where they hide. The solution is obvious. It’s just a matter of
willpower. The New Orleans Archdiocese showedthe fortitude to sweep
the rats out. Now it’s Boston’s turn.

3 thoughts on “Let’s show these prehistoric Massholes how we do things in Debris Town

  1. Well, evicting parishioners forcibly is NOT going to help the Catholic Church’s message much, n’est ce pas?
    This all could have been avoided had the Massholes Management STOPPED the paedophilia in its tracks many, MANY moons ago instead of ‘turning the other cheek’ so to speak. Then they wouldn’t have had to spend all that dosh on court fees, legal fees and payouts… No, instead they diddle the formerly innocent acolytes, pay thru the nose and then shut down their houses of worship and then skunk the remaining faithful that WANT to still worship despite the problems…
    Way to go Archdiocese of New Orleans, way to go.
    And the NOPD actually did a rooftop manhunt? Funny, they couldn’t do jack during the aftermath of Katrina to RESCUE folks fast enough. Between this mess, and the City of New Orleans leveling threats against the grieving yet artistic mother for her painted sidewalk – what the fuh-hell???? Like there isn’t a LARGER problem of violent crime…?!?!??!
    (beats head on worksurface…thud…thud…thud…!!!)

  2. correction – lemme rescind most of the vitriol I layered on NOPD (only as regards the busting into the church) – after reading Poppy Brite’s post on her Live Journal, there was apparently only one Testosterone-Timmeh who got a charge out of the deal. The rest were stuck like chuck having to do this. Please see Poppy Brite’s actual experience.

  3. I’m conflicted. On the one hand, the Catholic Church is, in fact, made of money and there’s no reason why it can’t support a nearly infinite number of loss-leader churches, other than that the Vatican makes the average dragon look like a piker in the hoarding business. On the other hand, I’m precisely antireligious enough to think that closing churches is on principle agood thing. The Catholic Church is also, in fact, made of human misery, and I’d like to see it dry up and blow away. (I’d also like to see just about every other religion* dry up and blow away, so I’m not being particularly sectarian here, FWIW.)
    * I say “just about” because there may actually be a harmless religion out there that I’m not aware of.

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