Coming To Get You


In your schools, in your pools, in a box, with a fox, green eggs and ham, etc.:

Studies show, no society that has totally embraced homosexuality has lasted for more than, you know, a few decades. . .

I honestly think it’s the biggest threat our nation has, even more so than terrorism or Islam.

They want to get them into the government schools so they can indoctrinate them.

…They are going after our young children, as young as two years of age, to try to teach them that the homosexual lifestyle is an acceptable lifestyle.

You know, gays are infiltrating city councils…did you know that the city council of Eureka Springs is now controlled by gays — they are winning elections.

One of my colleagues said We don’t have a gay problem in our community…well you know what, that is so dumb. If you have cancer in your little toe, do you just say that I’m going to forget about it since the rest of you is fine? It spreads! This stuff is deadly and it is spreading. It will destroy our young people and it will destroy this nation.

Controlled by gays, with their mind-control rays and their secret councils where they sacrifice good suburban matrons with tight perms to the lesbo goddesses. Somebody has a gay problem, all right, but it isn’t who this crazy bitch thinks it is.

Reading this supremely self-absorbed bullshit, I can only make the comparisons to the Freepi who see Islam around every corner, to the gun nuts who want to arm us all for the coming Reign of Fire-style era of total societal breakdown, the tinfoil-wearing alien-abduction crowd; that is, to groups of people who are just incredibly desperate for their lives to matter. They’re desperate to feel locked in some critical struggle, against outside forces determined to destroy them, the better to demonstrate their unyielding virtue and glorious strength. They’re desperate to be doing something that feels like doing something, and we’ve talked about this before, but more and more I think it’s what drives a lot of the cracktastic awfulness in society, this empty, gasping neediness, so that the first faux-fear “cause” that comes along snaps them right up. People living lives they thought mattered would never for an instant believe this shit; they’d been too busy doing other stuff.

Reasons aren’t excuses, of course; I can’t pity Mrs. I’ve Got Stuff Going On Crazy Eyes up there, because what she says results in harm to people. What she says does find a listening audience that nods along and says, “Yeah, now that you tell me I’m being subjugated by Teh Ghei, of course I feel it. Protect my marriage, please, by denying people health insurance.” It’s insidious and it needs to be opposed in the loudest voice possible, because Sally Kern didn’t come up with this shit on her own. Somebody told her, once, the things she’s telling others.


15 thoughts on “Coming To Get You

  1. If you have cancer in your little toe
    You’ll have to do better than rhetoric cribbed from Col. Flagg.
    I guess when you’re desperate for bullshit disease/health metaphors to describe the latest existential threat to America, there are whole buildings full of ditto masters and carbons from the Red Scare era to give you inspiration.

  2. The thought just occurred to me: once the dreadful “gay menace” is defeated, what will be next? The city dweller’s menace? The college education menace?

  3. I am Death. I am the lesbian overlord of the Crack Van. I am intent on driving it off a cliff, landing in a huge fireball on top of a nursery school full of innocent two year olds.
    Fear me America. I am not content here in your little toe. I am spreading…

  4. Oh, The Other Sarah, I wish they had enough to be afraid of. But they don’t–they have to be afraid of everything, everywhere, all the time. Otherwise, what would they do with their time? People obsessed with authoritarianism *need* fear, because otherwise, how do you justify giving your absolute obedience to the authority figure?
    What’s the biggest threat to fundie Christians?
    What do The Ghei have that scares them to death?
    What do we got that they ain’t got?

  5. Crap! I clicked the link to see who this nutcase was and the first word I saw was Oklahoma. So sorry that we produce so many of these people here. We’re not all that way.

  6. modernity must scare the shit out of them. they should just be a luddite. nobody is gonna forse gay sex on them and they aren’t required to get an ipod.

  7. Maybe someoneshould force gay sex and iPods on these people. Maybe once they came out the other side of the horrible Baphometic Fire Baptism (heheheh!) alive and mostly intact, they’d learn something.
    On the other hand, I’m not volunteering to either get an iPod or (especially!) sleep with Sally Kern, so take it for what it’s worth. 🙂

  8. “Maybe someone should force gay sex and iPods on these people. Maybe once they came out the other side of the horrible Baphometic Fire Baptism (heheheh!) alive and mostly intact, they’d learn something.”
    Maybe they’d come out of the closet themselves.

  9. wtf?!? more than a few generations?!? clearly whoever wrote this has never heard of, oh, um, where was it again…ANCIENT GREECE, widely held to be one of the cultures which sired our own “Western” civilization.

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