‘Teaching 3rd Graders and Doing Landscaping’

That sort of thing is apparently beneath our Galtian overlords:

Someone in the Chicago Board of Trade dropped leaflets on top of “Occupy Chicago” protesters Wednesday afternoon as they rallied alongside unions in the city’s financial district.

“We are Wall Street,” theleaflet said. “It is our job to make money.”

“Go ahead and continue to take us down, but you’re only going to hurt yourselves,” it continued. “What’s going to happen when we can’t find jobs on the Street anymore? Guess what: We’re going to take yours.”

“Do you really think we are incapable of teaching 3rd graders and doing landscaping?” the leaflet asked.

Right. You work at the Board of Trade because you’re ABOVE such things, after all. I mean, the reason you pledged a frat was so that you wouldn’t end up living life like the plebes do. Your parents played all that golf with the chancellor for a reason!

Fucking arrogant pricks. I’m sorry, but you know what? It is possible to be a rich person without being a TOTAL DILLHOLE. It is actually possible to go to your job, make your money, go home, and enjoy your life. America really wouldn’t hate you, if you did that. Not to the point that there’d be rallies outside your work place asking people to honk if they want you indicted.

What makes America hate you is shit like this, this epic whining that you have it so rough and how dare five guys with mowhawks bang drums. Not only do you want to make a giant pile of money to swim around in like Scrooge McDuck, but you want every single person in the world to love you, too. Guess what? It is a matter of physics. Eventually you have to stop jerking or you willbreak it off, man. It starts to look needy.

Nobody in any one of the dozens of Occupy outposts around the country is saying you, personally, Trader Joe, give me $50. What they’re saying is that the system rewards you and punishes them, and they would like to stop being fucked so hard constantly for the unpardonable sin of working every day. Doing trivial things. You know, like landscaping, or teaching third grade.



23 thoughts on “‘Teaching 3rd Graders and Doing Landscaping’

  1. They may be making money but they don’t MAKE anything. I won’t argue that they have no value but they don’t exactly contribute anything to the GDP.
    But, as you said, I don’t really give a crap how much someone makes as long as they don’t commit fraud, don’t steal taxpayers’ money, pay their fair share of taxes like the rest of us and don’t trash the economy.
    Is that too much to ask of these pricks?

  2. “Do you really think we are incapable of teaching 3rd graders and doing landscaping?”
    No, but I bet I can find people with 10 times the talent at doing both, and for less than what your overwrought ego thinks you deserve to be paid. Asshole.
    I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: I’m personallynot in favor of ending this by going the tumbrels-and-guillotines route, but whatever floats your boat, man…

  3. And I love it when Wall Street Gordon Gekko-wannabes start talking all tough:
    “What’s going to happen when we can’t find jobs on the Street anymore? Guess what: We’re going to take yours.”
    There are probably places where saying that kind of shit out loud will end with a quick trip to intensive care. Or worse, a morgue.

  4. “It’s our job to make money.”
    What a joke. We bailed out these creeps, and then they had the nerve to whine about the reasonable request that their annual bonuses be smaller than usual…given that, ahem, we had to bail out these creeps.
    “you’re only going to hurt yourselves, etc., blah blah blah…” Oh yeah? How?
    Job creators? What jobs? We’re supposed to be ok with 9 percent unemployment?
    Fuck ’em. Let ’em try to teach schoolkids or landscape yards. Outdoor work? One word: Coronary. And rehashing the “we’ll teach third grade” from whatever dipshit said it last spring is too rich, pardon the expression. If it wouldn’t irreparably harm impressionable kids, I’d make every last one of them try teaching 8 year olds for an extended spell…at least half would end up with felony convictions for child abuse…and the other half would quit.
    Too bad I don’t believe in hell…because they’d have the lowest circle all to themselves.

  5. Yeah, because everyone knows that third grade teachers only had to pass fourth grade, har-har! And landscaping is just mowing lawns, right? It requires absolutely no skill or training or physical endurance!
    I’d love to start a pool on how long this guy would last at either of those jobs. I might give him an hour or two at landscaping, if the weather was nice. Less than that in a third grade classroom.
    What an ass.

  6. They take a fee for transferring money from one place to another; they ‘make’ nothing.
    “Do you really think we are incapable of teaching 3rd graders and doing landscaping?” – Yes. Yes, I do. Prove me wrong.

  7. as i said to the very condescending father of a friend of my almost 40 years ago, “ok, frank. i’ll go to your office for two weeks and do whatever the fuck it is you do; you come teach – and i mean really teach – my TMH special ed kids for two weeks. then we’ll see who has all their marbles.”
    btw, rich fucks. if you lose your jobs on wall street and the CBOT, i understand there are lots of jobs opening for ag workers in alabama.

  8. Actually, Ido think they’re incapable of teaching 3rd graders and doing landscaping. Teach requires a lot of patience and creativity. Landscaping involves hard physical labor. Mr. Leaflet spent his entire year’s store of creativity and industry typing up that that stupid thing up, printing it out a few dozen times and dumping it out a window.

  9. I dunno…I kinda feel sorry for those guys up there in the towers. I can’t get Glengarry Glen Ross out of my head. I’d rather pump gas, honestly.

  10. “Do you really think we are incapable of teaching 3rd graders and doing landscaping?”
    Landscaping they might be able to handle, although probably not well and not for long. It is really amusing to even contemplate watching such a spectacle.
    But teach third grade? It is to laugh. How many of those assholes have elementary teaching certificates, do you suppose? I suspect very few of them, had they the proper credentials, would even get through the initial phone screening all prospective teachers in our school district have to pass. Those interviews, you see, are designed to screen out sociopaths and other undesirables who might be dangers to children, which seem to make up the majority of those working in the ‘financial services’ industry.

  11. Now I know where Alabama can get all the crop harvesters they need now that they have driven the workers out of the state. Wall Street wants to harvest your crops, Alabama.
    Abusers never think they are abusers as long as they are “not as bad as Hitler”. They lie steal and cheat people every day and when you object to their behavior you are the problem. Sociopaths are like that.

  12. “Do you really think we are incapable of teaching 3rd graders and doing landscaping?”

  13. And, no, they wouldn’t be any better at our jobs — not in the long term, anyway. Because it is an iron law of employment that if your attitude sucks, sooner or later, so will your performance.

  14. It would be nice if that little leaflet would turn out to be their “let them eat cake” moment. And I wouldn’t want them teaching my kids—I’m trying to raise them to be better than self-centered materialistic douchebags.

  15. The thing is that they’ve internalized the idea that money=skill/talent/goodness. Therefore, if you’re paid more money than someone else, that PROVES that you are better, more skilled, more talented than the person who’s paid less. That means that you could do that person’s job, if you wanted to lower yourself to that level, but that person couldn’t possibly do your job.
    There’s something wrong with the whole system, and that’s becoming clearer and clearer. They’re taking an inequitable and unreasonable system (someone who plays with money via computer is more worthwhile than someone who takes care of a sick or dying person? More worthwhile than someone who teaches a child? More worthwhile than someone who’s doing scientific research to improve the world?), and using the end results of that unreasonable and inequitable system to justify their position in the system.
    They need an education. A real education. I doubt they’d even make the cut for a landscaping job, let alone a teaching job.

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