Fox host Megyn Kelly doesn’t know a lot but what she knows she knows. You know what I’m saying?
“For all you kids watching at home, Santa just is white.”
Ms. Kelly was replying to a piece by Aisha Harris at Slate and just couldn’t resist stating what to her was obvious.Along with Ms. Harris, I beg to differ:
Santa is loosely based on Saint Nicholas, a fourth-century Greek bishop known for secret gift-giving. But while the names “St. Nicholas” and “Santa Claus” are often used interchangeably, modern-day Santa hardly resembles his supposed inspiration, who was depicted as tall and thin and, you know, Greek.
As a Greek-American, I can testify that Greeks tend to be swarthy. The original Saint Nick was probably a brunette with cafe au lait skin and a very hairy back. My mother’s Nordic genes are the only reason I escaped the hairy back thing but I do tan nicely. Trust me, I have many relatives who could pass for black if they wanted to. Of course, then they’d have to present their birth certificates to placate the birthers…
It got worse for Megyn with a Y. (Btw, does anyone know anyone who spells that name with a Y? I know only Megan’s or Meghan’s. Nary a Y or even YMCA in sight.) She elaborated on her, uh, historical knowledge:
Kelly, a Fox franchise player, dug herself in further by saying that Santa couldn’t be anything but Caucasian because he’s like Jesus. “Just because it makes you feel uncomfortable doesn’t mean it has to change,” Kelly said. “You know, I mean, Jesus was a white man, too.”
All this latest flap really illustrates is the abject stupidity of racial classifications. Only elderly white Republicans care if Jesus looked like a blond surfer dude from Orange County. Cowabunga. Of course, those are the people who watch Fox News. It’s kind of a pity that Megyn Kelly is the one spouting this nonsense. I’ve had a soft spot for her ever since her epic smackdown of Karl Rove on election night. I guess it’s time for her to enlist in Bill-O’s war against the war on Christmas. That would be mighty white of her…
I’ll let a certain Irish Catholic crooner have the last word with his legendary rendition of a Christmas classic that was written by a non-swarthy and possibly Republican Jew. Is that diverse enough for y’all?