I used a blurry screen shot of the man who isn’t sure how to pronounce his own name because his campaign is off to a blurry start. You say Duh-Santis and I say Dee-Santis. Let’s call the whole thing off.
I wish we could call the DeSantis campaign off. It’s joyless and pointless as he tries to outflank the Indicted Impeached Insult Comedian on the right. There’s no room to the right of Trump: he’s far right and far gone. DeSantis once again proves that he deserves my nickname for him, The Louse.
The Atlantic dispatched one of the funniest political writers in creation, Mark Leibovich, to cover The Louse in the Granite State. Suffice it to say that Leibovich thinks the Florida Man is shitty at retail politics. New Hampshire is all about retail politics, not glitzy ads wherein the candidate channels Tom Cruise.
Florida flash doesn’t work with the dour Yankees in Manchester unless you’re the Indicted Impeached Insult Comedian. Flash is his jam. He hung out with fellow pathological liar Truman Capote at Studio 54 back in the day, after all.
That was a long build up for a short and pithy quote of the day:
His whole act can feel like a clunky contrivance—a forced persona railing against phony or hyped-up outrages. He can be irascible. Steve Peoples, a reporter for the Associated Press, approached DeSantis after a speech at a VFW hall in Laconia and asked the governor why he hadn’t taken any questions from the audience. “Are you blind?” DeSantis snapped at Peoples. “Are you blind? Okay, so, people are coming up to me, talking to me [about] whatever they want to talk to me about.”
Here’s the video of The Louse being lousy:
We all know that this won’t hurt The Louse with the Republican base, but he better mind his tongue when he debates his opponents. I suspect Trump has a personalized insult ready for DeSantis. How is that pronounced again?
These David Byrne lyrics neatly sum up The Louse on the stump:
No sense of harmony, no sense of timeDon’t mention harmony, say“What is it? What is it? What is it?”Give a little shock, and he raises his handSomebody shouts out, says“What is it? What is it? What is it?”
DeSantis is just a blind man bluffing. The last word goes to Talking Heads:
I say “DiSastrous.”
How about “DeSphinctis”?