I’ve spent the final days of the campaign mocking Trump and Trumpers. It’s time to sing the praises of the next president of the United States, Kamala Harris, he said in his best convention roll call voice.
The thing many people do not understand about Kamala Harris is that she’s the lawyer’s lawyer. Many attorneys have sat in the Oval Office but only Lincoln and Taft were as immersed in the law as Kamala. It explains so much about her style.
Kamala is methodical and well-prepared but has a refreshingly goofy side as you can see from her appearance on SNL:
Her laugh is the stuff of legend as well as attacks from an opponent who never laughs. We cannot help how we laugh: I have a loud cackle, which should have led to a career as an audience plant for stand-up comedians but did not. Instead, I went to law school. So did Kamala Harris.
Kamala was immersed in the law from the time she entered what was then UC Hastings law school in San Francisco in 1986. It’s always been an elite law school, difficult to get into. I should know: I applied and was wait listed before going to Tulane in 1987.
Can you imagine the Kaiser of Chaos surviving the rigors of life as a 1L? Me neither, he would have bribed someone to take tests for him or some such shit. He is the stupidest person ever to be POTUS. He makes Dubya and Gamaliel look like stable geniuses.
Kamala worked as a line prosecutor before becoming San Francisco District Attorney and California Attorney General. I’m from the Bay Area and when she was running for DA an old friend told me that she had the right stuff to be the first woman president. That’s when I began following her impressive career which was based on intellect and hard work. As she says in her stump speech, “Hard work is good work.”
Trial lawyers are a special breed. They learn early on to think on their feet and pivot when things are going wrong. Those skills have served Kamala well as she climbed what Disraeli called the “greasy pole” of politics.
As a Senator, she was known for her skillful questioning of Judiciary committee witnesses including Justice Bro DBA Brett Kavanaugh:
Her first presidential campaign flopped. She wasn’t quite ready to top the ticket, but she learned from her mistakes. That’s what intelligent people do as opposed to her opponent who repeatedly makes the same mistakes. Kamala adapts and pivots.
2020 was not Kamala’s time to be president. Instead, Joe Biden selected her as his running mate and her rise continued. She faced a lot of stupid criticism that was rooted in sexism, but she kept grinding and served Biden loyally and well.
As Veep, she learned about governing from a master. She was present for every important meeting and was involved in all major decisions. She was treated with the same respect by Biden as he was shown by Barack Obama. She watched, listened, and learned. When Joe decided to withdraw, she was ready as his trusted Vice President to pick up the torch and carry it to victory. It was finally Kamala’s time.
Kamala has been relentlessly on message. She’s been one of the best presidential candidates of my lifetime equaled only by Barack Obama. We’ve been told repeatedly that she was about to give the most important speech of her life. She nailed it every time as she did the debate, which I called the Philadelphia Beatdown. Kamala Harris is a big game player.
Kamala’s campaign was compressed into 107 days, which is an argument for shorter campaigns. Team Harris ran a nearly perfect campaign without major missteps or gaffes. The disgusting trolls of Team Trump threw everything they had at her, but nothing stuck. It’s because Kamala Harris knows who she is and where she’s going.
Kamala is a genuinely nice human being, but like all trial lawyers, she’s tough. She’s withstood the Insult Comedian’s barbs about her intelligence because she knows they’re not only untrue but based on projection. In 2016, Trump was rubber and Hillary Clinton was glue. In 2024, the reverse is true.
It’s been a long time coming but America is ready for our first woman president. We can thank the Dobbs opinion for that. Ever since Sam the Sham Alito’s horrendous opinion was handed down, American women have been pissed off at having such an important and intimate right taken away. If SCOTUS told me what I could do with my body, I’d be pissed too.
I selected the featured image of the Two Kamalas because it captures the Veep’s warmth and sense of humor. I also have a small crush on Maya Rudolph. I hope playing Kamala Harris is an 8-year gig for Maya. She deserves it, so does America.
It’s Kamala’s time.
The last word goes to Todd Rundgren:
Repeat after me: We got this.