FIFA made up its own peace award and gave it to Donald Trump. Or perhaps more accurately, Donald Trump convinced FIFA to give him a peace award as partial thanks for the U.S. hosting the World Cup.

But why a peace award? Well, DJT is touchy when it comes to peace. I think he’s still a little perturbed that green-lighting the prolonged razing of Gaza and then “brokering” a “cease fire” between the Netanyahu government and Hamas didn’t cement his reputation as a peacemaker supreme.

Attempting to eradicate an institution known as the United States Institute Of Peace also presents the PR equivalent of an own goal in this effort, but that didn’t stop DJT. The administration would still like the Institute to disappear, but until then, DJT decided to slap his name on the building entrance.

I haven’t seen that kind of blatant credit theft since umpteen Congressional Republicans sent out press releases to their districts touting all that Biden infrastructure that they had loudly voted against.

The things these people can do with a straight face.

Speaking of slapping names on stuff, you probably saw the homemade signage put up outside the Oval Office and elsewhere in the White House last month. What are we supposed to make of that?

Seems to me it accomplishes two things. First off, it achieves the nearly impossible and temporarily distracts the eye from the tacky-ass “gold” accents now scattered in the vicinity.

Secondly, it would help anyone who doesn’t know where they’re going. Or maybe started to have trouble recalling what is located where. The signage has been upgraded to something less slapdash, and I have no big desire to be that guy here, but seriously, look at the original work above. That’s not done to please a man who likes to be known for his attention to design details and finishes. That’s signage of urgency and/or necessity. Prove me wrong. It’ll be a (slight) relief.

But Back To Awards
With the FIFA fête concluded, what other current events trophies might we mete out?

Given the $12 billion taxpayer dollars Trump now wants to send to the farmers that he screwed over with needless tariff follies in the first place, the president has also made a strong case for the first Smoot Hawley Award For Negative-Sum-Gain Economics.

With the elimination of Dr. King’s birthday and Juneteenth as free admission days in America’s national parks, DJT is a shoo-in for the David Duke Award for Civil Rights Transparency.

Spreading the glory around at least a little bit, Secretary of Defense Hegseth not only picks up but serves as namesake for the Pete Hegseth Award for Underachievement In Military Ethics. His smile says it’s a real honor, but his eyes tell you that he really wanted the Duke award.

Feel free to submit your own awards/recipients below. I’ll be here hoping to win this year’s Hostess Snack Cake Literary Achievement Award.