Pam Bondi has been called many things since becoming Trump’s Attorney General; none complimentary. She’s been compared to Cruella de Vil and called a mean girl. I’m down with both descriptions but let’s throw another one on the bonfire and see if it burns. Bondi’s arrogant and haughty demeanor at Congressional hearings is straight out of the dominatrix playbook. Should the AG be called Mistress Pam? Hence the post title inspired by this venerable song by The Tubes:

If Bondi is a dominatrix, she’s an odd one. She’s all S with Congress and the public and all M with her audience of one, the Kaiser of Chaos. She’s done his bidding: presiding over invalid indictments, lying in court documents, defying court orders, and turning the DOJ into Trump’s personal law firm. Why not? She was one of his shysters during his first impeachment. You know, the one about the “perfect phone call” with President Zelensky.

Cruella de Vil was, of course, a character in Disney’s 1001 Dalmatians. Mistress Pam is associated in my mind with the dog sprawled across her lap in the featured image, a St. Bernard named Master Tank:

“As reported by the Tampa Bay Times in 2010, as Hurricane Katrina hit in 2005, the Couture family from New Orleans, Louisiana, left their dog, Master Tank, at a temporary animal shelter. The Humane Society of Pinellas County later received Tank alongside more than 280 other animals.

Bondi adopted Tank, a Saint Bernard, in October 2005, renaming him Noah. However, when the Coutures tracked down the dog, Bondi refused to return him, saying the dog had heartworms and other problems before the hurricane. The family sued, but the case was settled before trial, with the dog returned to the Coutures.

When the Tampa Bay Times asked whether she was concerned by any reputational damage caused by the story, Bondi said, “Not at all.”

“I’ve received a tremendous amount of support from people and animal rights activists and no criticism at all,” she added.”

That was, of course, untrue. Anyone surprised? Lying is like breathing for MAGA maggots like Bondi.

One could call this case: Master Tank v. Mistress Pam. Oddly enough, there’s an Australia clothing brand called Bondi Couture. They make wedding dresses, not dog sweaters. I am not making this up.

Does President Pennywise know that his submissive stooge is a dog lover? He hates dogs. Mistress Pam may not be a  dog-stealer but she’s certainly a dog-suer. The Couture case reflects Bondi’s S side: going after Katrina victims wasn’t cool. It even became an issue in her 2010 campaign for Florida AG. That was before she took a dive for Trump on one of his many fraud cases.

Back to Bondi’s Capitol Hill performances. She brought binders full of oppo-research with which to beat up on Democrats who dared to ask tough questions. It reminded me of this bizarre moment during a 2012 Obama-Romney debate:

Since 2012 the GOP has gone from Romney’s binders full of women to Bondi’s binders full of bluster and bullshit.

Willard Mittbot Romney’s clueless weirdness seems refreshing after 10 years of Donald Trump’s malevolent weirdness. That’s why I call him President Pennywise.

Bondi’s DOJ is retreating on several fronts. Perhaps she’s worried about disbarment or worse after Trump 2.0 ends. The Insult Comedian may be immune from prosecution, but his minions are not. It would be a fitting conclusion to Mistress Pam’s grotesque misrule of the DOJ. Put that binder down and STFU, Pam.

The last word goes to The Tubes with this medley of Don’t Touch Me There and Mondo Bondage: